Petr Cech

'Petr should heed his team-mates' warnings when Stephen Hunt is about,' snuffles Rowan Averill Photograph: Photomontage

Matt Warnes reckons Petr should play in a softer area if he's going to avoid injury Photograph: Photomontage

Stew Allan reckons Petr will never part from his headgear Photograph: Photomontage

'The best form of defence is attack. That, and a big helmet,' chuckles Paul Fisher Photograph: Photomontage

'Ivanovic decided against suggesting a game of Swingball next.' Allan Heywood, we thank you Photograph: Photomontage

'A tad confused, Cech leaves Chelsea in search of a new group of freeloading whingers,' honks Christopher Huff Photograph: Photomontage

Christopher Parker notices the Chelsea goalkeeper's likeness to Detroit's finest semi-robotic fictional crime fighter. 'Your move, creep' Photograph: Photomontage

Koichiro Yamamura reckons tin hats not skull caps could be in order for Petr Cech given the alleged behaviour of some Chelsea players Photograph: Photomontage

Tom Nycz-Losi continues along the same theme. 'Come on Ashley, we've flogged this horse as much as we can, time to get rid ...' Photograph: Photomontage