Age: Six.
Appearance: An inbox clogged with purchase confirmation emails.
Sounds grisly. What is it? It's the busiest day of the year for online shoppers.
And when is it? That depends.
On what? Who you ask. Some people think it's today. Others think it was a week ago.
I'm asking you. Which is it? Probably neither. In the UK, at least according to predictions from major online retailers including eBay, Amazon and John Lewis, Cyber Monday is almost certainly 5 December. Past sales figures suggest the same: last year, British shoppers bought £350m of gifts online on the first Monday in December, and spent over £1m in a single minute at lunchtime. Although that may just have been one incredibly wealthy mum.
Like that one in the Littlewoods ad? Probably her, yep.
How come we do so much of our online shopping at Monday lunchtime? Theories abound.
Such as? Because we've just been paid; because shopping at work makes it easier to avoid the prying eyes of kids and partners; because the internet in our offices tends to be faster and more reliable than at home; because, having eyed up our intended pressies on the high street over the weekend, we head online to find them all going cheap; and because there's nothing else to do at work on a Monday.
And because a lot of us still secretly believe that the internet's closed on Sundays? And that, yes.
Is there a risk of our gifts not arriving if we don't get in before Cyber Monday? Probably not, although a lot of people had bad experiences with snow last year, part of the reason some analysts predict an early peak in online sales this time.
Still, it's best to get our online shopping in before the rush, surely? Well, even on Cyber Monday, you are unlikely to encounter too many queues.
Yes, I realise that, thanks. It's always best to check with you.
Not to be confused with: Cyborg Monday.
