Age: Eternal or born a day ago, depending on how you look at it.
Meaning? Wait a sec. I'll come back to it. Let's do appearance first.
OK, appearance: Expensive suit, flashy silk tie, Rolex, probably in that chauffeur-driven Merc that just cut you up at the lights.
Bosses, bankers, big shots? Yes, and they, of course, have always been with us. But left-leaning think tank Compass reckon it's become more sinister – that untouchable corporate elites are now out of control. "They have gone feral," said Compass chair Neal Lawson yesterday, lumping together the bankers who caused the crash of 2008, fiddling politicians, media moguls whose newspapers hack phones, and the police who let them do it.
What does he propose? Kill the bankers? Burn the duckhouses? Hack the moguls? Lock up the police? Not immediately. He's launched a petition signed by lots of people from the non-feral elite.
Such as? Greg Dyke, Philip Pullman, Caroline Lucas, Henry Porter.
What about Baroness Helena Kennedy QC? She must have signed. Of course. I was taking that as read.
And the activist Laurie Penny? Naturally. Now, can we get on please.
What does the petition propose? To set up a "People's Jury" made up of 1,000 British citizens chosen by lottery, to propose reforms to banking, politics, the media and the police.
A thousand angry men! And even angrier women.
Could it work? Highly unlikely. Can you see 1,000 randomly chosen Brits agreeing on anything, other than perhaps the restoration of capital punishment?
I think you're just jealous that you weren't invited to sign the petition. I see Polly Toynbee and Madeleine Bunting are on the list. That's below the belt.
Not to be confused with: The far less threatening feral underclass.
Do say: "Revolution now!"
Don't say: "Let's ask the People's Jury subcommittee on bankers' bonuses to report back in May 2014."
