Appearance: Head prefect.
Spiritual status: Saintly - she is a prominent Christian and takes mass every day.
Earthly status: Saviour of the gastronomically disadvantaged.
Sorry? Her TV programmes and books have raised the culinary standards of a nation. She has taught us everything from boiling an egg to concocting the perfect soufflé.
Marvellous. What does she do when she's not slaving over a hot stove? Counts her cash - she is worth millions.
How does she spend her money? On her abiding passion - football. She is a fervent supporter of Norwich City, where she is a director and majority shareholder.
Are they any good? They had a brief moment of glory five years ago when they beat Bayern Munich, but are now floundering in the middle of the Nationwide League.
How sad. But at least the food must be good. Ah, we'd rather not talk about that.
Why is that? There's been a touch of the Gordon Ramsays in the Norwich City kitchen. The caterers, Food East, have been given the red card.
Fowl play? Supporters were choked about the soaring price of pies and crisps, the lack of catering staff, and the overcooked vegetables.
On the field? No, in the newly-built carvery.
So what happened? Food East is reported to have lost the catering contract - fans reckon they were booted out, though Delia insists it was an amicable parting.
Who will do the cooking now? Delia is planning to steam to the rescue, acting as culinary consultant to the club.
What's likely to be on the menu? Canary en chemise, canary con rucola, canary stuffed with ricotta in balsamic vinegar.
Note for the non-cognoscenti: Norwich, who play in yellow, are called the Canaries.
Not to be confused with: Mrs Beeton, a Woolwich Arsenal fan.
Do mention: The seasoning.
Don't mention: The season.
