Appearance: Rarely for more than 10 minutes at a time.
What Ian Wright Wright Wright? More like Ian Wrong Wrong Wrong.
What's he done? Brought himself into disrepute once more.
Oh, come on. I rather like his programme. Jiggly hips, leathers and Harley Davidson tattoo. Smartest chat show host since Russell Harty. What's he done to get you on your high horse? In a fit of pique, he trashed a referee's dressing room.
Not surprising if the bloke had been given a bigger one than Wrighty. We're not talking showbiz here, we're talking football.
What, Ian Wright of Friday Night's All Wright used to be a footballer? Well spotted.
And he's still playing? Occasionally. After a year truncated by injury, he celebrated his return by being the first of three West Ham players to be shown the red card by referee Rob Harris during Saturday's match against Leeds.
What for? Couple of bad challenges, bit of back chat.
Isn't chat what he's paid for? Not on a football pitch. Anyhow, after he had to be restrained by team-mates from confronting Harris on the pitch, he allegedly kicked down the door of the ref's changing room and flung the man's belongings around the room.
Seems a perfectly acceptable showbiz tantrum to me. True enough, but he's not playing for Chelsea.
Didn't he go in for some anger counselling a couple of years ago, to control such outbursts of temper? Indeed he did, following his team-mates Tony Adams and Paul Merson, he sought professional help for his problem. And announced he had got on top of it.
So what happened? He went into showbiz, met Elton John and thought tantrums were what stars had.
Don't say: Oi, Wrighty, it's an early bath for you.
Do say: He was just auditioning for Changing Rooms.
