That’s a pretty good comeback from England in the second half of the day. Not enough to redeem the manner of yesterday’s spin bowling, but enough to hint that they might be able to save this game. If Cook and Moeen can hang about for the first session tomorrow, then Pakistan will be concerned - on which point, Stokes and Wood did very well after tea to take wickets.
All of which, of course, is far too parochial, so: Shoaib’s 245 was a masterful knock, and for all the talk of flat tracks, it’s unlikely anyone else will get anywhere near it in this game.
Otherwise, that’s us - we’ll be back tomorrow.
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21st over: England 56-0 (Cook 39, Ali 15) Imran with the final over of the day; two off-side catchers come in, one at mid-off and one at short cover. Two dots follow, then Cook clips off his knees to square-leg and they amble three before Moeen takes a single into the on-side and Cook defends, taking us to stumps.
20th over: England 52-0 (Cook 36, Ali 14) Looks like one more over after this one. Shafiq is on - Shoaib is still nowhere to be seen, the indolent skiver - and singles off the fifth and sixth balls, once they’ve had a look at him, give the illusion of movement.
19th over: England 50-0 (Cook 35, Ali 13) Moeen raises England’s 50 with a knock through midwicket, the only run of the over. Seems a lot like everyone wants to lock up, go home, and talk themselves into coming back tomorrow.
“If you follow Robert Wilson’s suggestion of Root starring in a Bond film,” emails Robin Hazlehurst, can I suggest David Warner be cast as the villain? Or at least as the leading heavy goon. The fight scene between them, with the villain’s lair disguised as a Walkabout and Root disguised in a beard, would be fun to film.”
If Warner’s any villain, he’s this one.
18th over: England 49-0 (Cook 35, Ali 12) A quiet over, a single each from it, and England - whose nightwatchman, Mark Wood is ready - are nearly there. The pitch is “quite dead”, says Bumble, channeling Oscar Wilde.
17th over: England 47-0 (Cook 34, Ali 11) Khan back on and Moeen continues to play watchfully. The consensus in the studio, reached by Rob Key and Matt Prior - has it ever hosted fewer letters? - was that he should play his natural game as that’s always best. But then he doesn’t at number 8, so why would he at number 2, in pursuit of a monster total? Tricky, I guess - or perhaps not, if you’re a bloke looking to cement a spot in the team so keen not to give it away.
Shoaib Malik makes the first ever score of 245 in Test cricket. Only 229 and 238 left to complete the full set of scores from 0 to 250.
— Jonathan Liew (@jonathanliew) October 14, 2015
Ought one to take one for the team, and get out on one of those two other scores, when one reaches them?
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16th over: England 45-0 (Cook 34, Ali 9) After more tight stuff - a single from the first five balls - Cook steps into the sixth, tossed up dead slow, and whips four to square-leg.
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15th over: England 40-0 (Cook 30, Ali 8) Wahab is hurling the entirety of his corporeal into this spell and follows Moeen with a fuller inswinger as he backs away. It’s edged into the pads and there’s a strangulated appeal, drowned out by the call of “no ball”. The england players are sat in the stands with Bell and Rashid in the front row staring at laptops - presumably some sort of hazing ritual. Maybe My Family or The Upper Hand is playing on loop. Three from the over.
14th over: England 37-0 (Cook 29, Ali 7) Zulfiqar continues and after no joy from over, tries coming around. He’s not doing much with the ball, but then you don’t need to to get the edge; he doesn’t though, ceding a single to Cook bunted into the covers.
13th over: England 36-0 (Cook 28, Ali 7) Wahab’s up to 146kph and draws Cook into fencing at one, unsure whether to commit forwards or backwards. He misses, and then again - things are hotting up nicely.
Meanwhile, here’s Robert Wilson on “making your own entertainment” from a little earlier:
“I’m not implying anything but have you noticed that Root’s run-up is exactly that of a secret agent stealing something imperfectly explained but crucially important from a well-guarded, multi-storey criminal lair in a low-rent 90s action film. If you squint, it has an unmistakeable touch of the Jean-Claude Van Dammes about it.
Well, actually, I am implying something. Joe as the new Bond. It would be the perfect cover. International cricketer by day, deadly operative by night. In a variety of the world’s glamour locations - Mumbai, Brisbane, Nottingham. The Blond Barrier has already been broken and Americans would love the exoticism. AND the accent.”
Could anyone love that accent? Only joshing! Though I did discover in seeking the below that Thomas Allinson was from Hulme, so would in fact have spoken Mancunian, unlike Brian Glover.
12th over: England 33-0 (Cook 25, Ali 7) Zulfiqar’s spinning it hard, finding a suspicion of drift though not much in the way of turn. There’s a slip, a leg-slip and short-leg, with men three-quarters of the way back either side of the wicket. That looks sensible - if Moeen goes for it and connects, he’ll clear the fence, but if he miscues, there’s a good chance the ball will go to hand.
11th over: England 32-0 (Cook 24, Ali 7) Wahab is hammering in here, Moeen leaving him reasonably - Athers thinks they should have two slips, and sure enough, one goes in. He then ducks a short one - seems unlikely they’re not aware of his tendency to look away - and if I were him, which, of course, I’m not, I’d be sending down a few more of those. And, as pointed out, it’s slightly odd England didn’t try harder to bang it in, especially given the 53,409 bowlers in the XI. Maiden.
The players have a drink and a blether.
10th over: England 32-0 (Cook 24, Ali 7) Three to Cook flicked to midwicket - run em up, lads! Sprint the first hard! - then a single to Moeen nurdled towards the same area. England are handling things well here, with Cook’s 24 coming from just 33 balls.
“You’re out!” emails Richard O’Hagan. “Not ‘handled the ball’ but ‘obstructing the field’. Puts you in good company, though - Len Hutton and some bloke named Stokes.”
I think I disagree with this; not your interpretation of the laws, but that diverting the flight should be prohibited. If you’re quick enough to get there first, hard lines chaps.
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9th over: England 28-0 (Cook 21, Ali 6) If Wahab can muster the aggression for which he’s famous, he could make things uncomfy for England, and here he is. Talking of Wahab, given that he was fined for one of the most brilliant memories of the last World Cup - it’s below - what should be the rules as to permitted sledging and needle? Cook takes three from the over, a two clipped to leg and a single similarly dispatched, before a helpful cross-seam wide - intended, perhaps, to scuff the ball for reverse-swing and spin - adds another to the total.
8th over: England 24-0 (Cook 18, Ali 6) So, it look like Moeen is playing his natural game - he slog-sweeps Zulfiqar away over square-leg, and they run two. Meanwhile, a Peregrine Falcon tucks into a smaller ex-bird beyond the boundary.
7th over: England 21-0 (Cook 17, Ali 4) Partisan sentiments aside, what an annoyance that Yasir Shah isn’t fit enough to play here. Anyhow, Rahat gives Cook a modicum of width and is duly battered through cover for four, then taken for three more down to midwicket. Then, with the final ball of the over, one bounces a little - ! - and Moeen splices it behind, just safe of point. They run one.
6th over: England 14-0 (Cook 10, Ali 3) Zulfiqar is given the new ball, and this is where things will really get going. He’ll bowl quicker than Moeen and Rashid, I’d expect, a subject upon which Graeme Swann has been very vocal on TMS (yes, along with entymology, Twitter, the policy process in the modern capitalist state and so on. But basically, he says, and should know, that a spinner has to bowl as fast as possible to still get turn. Maiden.
5th over: England 14-0 (Cook 10, Ali 3) The leg-bye that came during the appeal is the only run from the over.
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Bat first! Pakistan lose their first review!
Surprised they went for that, didn’t seem there was much going for it. Worth pointing out that Moeen was so late on that it was almost posthumous, to borrow John Arlott’s lovely phrase.
5th over: England 13-0 (Cook 10, Ali 3) Oooh, Rahat raps Cook on the pad, there’s an appeal - thought i heard bat, not sure it was hitting - and they review!
4th over: England 13-0 (Cook 10, Ali 3) Khan comes around the wicket to Cook after his first ball is easily negated, but it doesn’t help much. A block is followed by a timed block that races down the ground as they run three - ouch - and then three more when Moeen caresses through extra-cover - double ouch. In all our hand-wringing about where he should bat, we shouldn’t forget that he really is a lovely cricketer.
“Bessborough was the initial club of Mark Ramprakash,” emails Matt Emerson, “who I spent an unhappy afternoon watch fillet the Kenton U-14 attack [including me] aged about 11. He then took about five wickets as well. I never liked him after that - a view that was vindicated when he sodded off to Surrey...”
Ah, I think the apocryphal tale we were always told that he was pinched from Stanmore, despite their lovely ground. Still, you can always remain secure in the knowledge that, like all the world’s finest sportsmen, you’re from Kenton.
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3rd over: England 7-0 (Cook 7, Ali 0) But that’s probably nonsense, because Rahat looks dangerous - or at least Cook just made him look thus, swiping across his front pad seeking to pull. He missed, but an inside-edge saved him from leg-before and next ball, ushered two into the covers. Then another single, and this is back to being sedate.
2nd over: England 4-0 (Cook 4, Ali 0) Cook clips two off his hip as Imran Khan races in, and another shove into the on-side earns him a single. Those are the only runs from the over, and already, this feels like we’re simply waiting for the twirlers to come on.
“Given recent events, maybe Bell could cease to be known as Belly or the Sledgehammer of Eternal Justice and become Buckethands instead, as you suggest,” suggests John Starbuck. This would be especially apt because they turn out to be such clangers when he does drop them.”
Consider it done.
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1st over: England 1-0 (Cook 1, Ali 0) Rahat Ali opens, and second delivery, Cook nearly goes! He slices down into the turf, and as it rears up, he makes to claw it away - as Gooch did against Australia (in 1989, I think, having made a ton). But he gathers himself, lets it pass over the top, and makes sure not to knock his stumps over. The week after after the Gooch dismissal, the OBO checked a drive playing for Belmont under-15s against Bessborough, and as the fielder came in to catch, elbowed the ball into the track. In retrospect, that’s probably out, not simply appalling sportsmanship.
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Anyway, here we go.
Bad news: Rashid’s figures of 34-0-163-0 are the worst on debut in Test history.
And, should England attack? Or defend and hope not to get out? That is not an easy one to answer.
How long before Pakistan’s spinners are on? Ten overs maximum, I’d guess.
Pakistan declare on 523-8.
That’s a pretty smart effort. England are already batting to save the Test - 23 overs tonight and all of tomorrow, at least. Unless of course, they’re preparing for us the greater drama of a second innings rearguard.
WICKET! Zulfiqar c Anderson b Stokes 0 (Pakistan 523-8)
Zulfiqar heaves a short one and top-edges to midwicket.
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151st over: Pakistan 523-7 (Wahab 2, Zulfiqar 0) England’s openers will be starting to focus elsewhere, as the camera zooms in on Alastair Cook’s webbing, the metatarsal de nos jours. Athers suggests Rashid be given a bowl to see if he can get a wicket, but the current two are doing well. He’s probably still right, but - the longer they can keep Pakistan out there the better, in a curiously masochistic paradox that encapsulates a beauty of Test cricket.
150th over: Pakistan 521-7 (Wahab 0, Zulfiqar 0) We can be far from the transformation of featherbed into minefield.
“As England aren’t always the best at adapting to conditions outside of their own,” says Will Hardy diplomatically, “am I the only one anticipating plenty of leading edges and mistimed chips to midwicket as they struggle with the slow pitch?”
WICKET! Malik c Bell b Stokes 245 (517-7)
He’s wearing baseball gloves! Shoaib, physically finished, swipes at Stokes from outside off to Bell at mid-on and staggers off. What an innings that was - more than 10 hours he’s punished England, and he’s probably safe for the second Test. Stokes has 3-57 - decent, despite the context.
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149th over: Pakistan 517-6 (Malik 245, Wahab 0) Shoaib isn’t running, as well he might not - and Wahab, presumably, will have a swing. He’s still on 0 at the end of the over, though, whole Shoaib check a pull of its final delivery and sees it loop up harmlessly onto the leg-side.
“Nor me re: Ali,” says Christopher Dale. “Feels very much like a return to the worst of the Fletcher selections where players within the squad thought to be ‘international’ players were always preferred to county players without international experience.”
I almost don’t mind that - it’s the short-termism, if that’s what it is, or the belief that Moeen will be fine to open against Vernon, Morne and Dale, if that’s what it is.
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WICKET! Sarfraz c Bell b Stokes 2 (Pakistan 514-6)
It’s a procession! Leading edge from Sarfraz, and the ball pops up into the ever reliable buckets of Safehands Bell at mid-off. Sarfraz looks at the pitch accusingly - how dare it offer any assistance!
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148th over: Pakistan 514-5 (Malik 243, Sarfraz 2) Sarfraz is perambulating down the pitch to Stokes right on a length - superb behaviour, no doubt antagonising the bowler and assisting his own in one fell swoop. The batters then sneak a single to mid-off, the throw comes in, and Stokes vaults the stumps to try and backhand flip onto them - succeed and it’s out. He can’t get a hand on it, Shoaib collapses with knacker and cramp, and they take drinks - seems like Misbah offers him the chance to come in, but as if he’s doing that.
“Stokes bowling off-spin... almost as good as Alec Stewart bowling bumpers in the West Indies in 1994”, tweets Chris Langmead.
Talking of surprising things, a tangent: Little Miss Star, by Roger Hargreaves, is, like, seriously meta, man. When have you been similarly surprised?
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147th over: Pakistan 510-5 (Malik 241, Sarfraz 1) Wood in again, starting with three dots and then speeding up - 142kph is not bad at all. Next comes the off-cutter again, dabbed down to slip by Shoaib, and that’s maiden!
“I cannot recall anyone ever in the history of Test match cricket dropping two batsmen when they’ve been on single digit scores and then both those batsmen going on to get hundreds...” says Toby de Mellow, perhaps rendering his name somewhat incongruous. Anyone able to help? England do seem to hold many of the most unwanted records, given their record in the game.
146th over: Pakistan 510-5 (Malik 241, Sarfraz 1) Shoaib goes at Stokes, now bowling his usual style, flipping two to square-leg then creaming six down the ground - he’s in the zone, alright.
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145th over: Pakistan 501-5 (Malik 232, Sarfraz 1) Well bowled Mark Wood, and well enjoyed given the circumstances.
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Shafiq is gone!
This is a good delivery from Wood, a slower ball off-cutter. Shafiq, perhaps not properly focused after tea, is late on it, and it’s actually unclear why he bothered reviewing accept from on general principle.
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REVIEW! OBVIOUSLY!
...
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WICKET! SERIOUSLY! Shafiq lbw b Wood 107 (Pakistan 499-5)
...
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Shameful plug: Kevin Pietersen on Cricket is available now, and I was lucky enough to help. You can buy it here, and it’s about, er cricket. The below appears on its jacket.
“Kevin Pietersen on Cricket takes a detailed, thematic look at the sport, breaking down the tricks, tactics and techniques of its great players. How do you cope with the emotional overload of Shoaib Akhtar bowling to you at 95mph, and how do you play him? How did Shane Warne create the theatre that got him so many wickets? How do you handle the stress of batting to win the Ashes? How does bad form feel, how does good form feel, and how does it feel to be in the zone?”
Oh dear. Adil Rashid has conceded more runs than anyone ever before on Test debut, who hasn’t taken a wicket. He’s also not bowled a single maiden.
Joshing, of course. Rashid needs time, patience, and ideally, a total to bowl at. There’s not even much turn in the wicket so far, nor much bounce. Ouch,
144th over: Pakistan 499-4 (Malik 231, Shafiq 107) Time for a bit of off-spin: Stokes into the attack. Yes, really. Send in your other unlikely cricketing sights...
Anyway, his first ball is rammed through the covers for two, followed by a single clipped off the pads, and then after three dots and a two, it’s tea. Another wicketless session for England, another jazzer for Pakistan, and in 20 minutes, we’ll find things get really interesting. See you then.
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143rd over: Pakistan 494-4 (Malik 229, Shafiq 104) Appeal for caught behind down the leg-side to root second ball - there was a bit of turn, but the noise probably came off the pad. Good effort to muster the energy to hope to create the noise to ask the question, though. Then, after a single to Malik - he’s got a hurt leg, incidentally - Shafiq takes one too, behind square on the off-side, and had the throw been accurate, he was gone. It was not, and he isn’t.
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142nd over: Pakistan 492-4 (Malik 228, Shafiq 104) Shoaib’s had enough, sweeping the returning Moeen for four, then crashing him through the covers fo fo mo. Single completes the scoring for the over, and there really is nothing England can do about it.
“I know this isn’t strictly sub-continent cricket,” excuses Andy English, “but the lifeless, batting nirvana pitches do not make for the kind of thrilling, unpredictable test tussles, in front of large crowds, we all enjoyed this past summer. If you consider the whole sub continent now feeds on a glut of limited over cricket with lashings of twenty over stuff to wash it down with, it’s no wonder that test cricket appears to be in it’s autumnal years over there, sitting in a nursing home, staring out of the window, watching the younger formats of the game rush by, as it waits for the inevitable... and a cup of tea at 4’o’clock... and perhaps a biscuit or two.”
I don’t mind this too much - the variety of Test cricket is more important than regular crash boom bang. We’re better than that. And we might well see the game speed up after tea, when England begin their response.
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141st over: Pakistan 483-4 (Malik 219, Shafiq 104) Root returns - this will be a strong test of his fabled bounciness. “This’ll teach you to be so appallingly happy,” barks the cosmos in his cochlea. Three from the over
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140th over: Pakistan 480-4 (Malik 217, Shafiq 104) Deirdre - please someone confirm that’s Adil’s nickname, or the Weatherfield One for those not into the whole brevity thing - continues. He must have some sore udders, milked again for singles, though he’ll be relieved to have avoided the last over’s assault.
“Ali opening,” emails Christopher Dale, “feels very much like selectorial Micawberism. They’re taking a punt on Ali in friendly conditions in the hope he performs better than expected and grows into the role (and, as his Sri Lanka innings shows, he can defend), and simultaneously playing for time until somebody from the counties (Lees? Burns? Robson if he can find any form?) solves the issue for them.”
Hmmmm - I just don’t see how doing well her tells us anything about doing well in the next series, especially for someone who’s shown a weakness against short stuff.
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139th over: Pakistan 477-4 (Malik 215, Shafiq 103) Anderson is wringing his guts out here, opening with three dots, only for his fourth to go for four byes, with Buttler standing up. ANGER. Silly mid-on and off in now, and Shafiq tucks two away to midwicket to grind England even further into the gristle.
“Why is playing two wicketkeepers dopey?” asks Andrew Kelly “Sri Lanka did it for ages. They’re both good batsmen (well, one’s a bit out of form but worth sticking with). It’s not like you’ve picked a goalkeeper in centre midfield.”
I’m not sure it is - well, not in my opinion, anyhow. I’m not sure I’d have Bairstow in the side - his debut aside, a properly serious innings, I’ve not seen a Test batter in him. But the fact that he also keeps is a pro not a con.
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138th over: Pakistan 471-4 (Malik 215, Shafiq 101) Shafiq gets down on one knee to swing Rashid’s first delivery to square-leg for a single, then Malik skips down to mash his second over mid-off for a one-bounce four, bringing up the bowler’s noughtfer 150. And oh dear! and oh wow!, it gets worse and better - a six clattered over long on, then two more as he goes again over the off-side, just beating Bairstow’s despairing dive - obviously. That was painful and brilliant to watch.
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137th over: Pakistan 458-4 (Malik 203, Shafiq 100) In commentary, they’re discussing Ricky Ponting’s idea that the visiting captain be allowed to choose whether to bat or bowl in the first Test. I’m not sure I’m into that - it would affect the pitch that’s prepared, and in any case, the stats as to who wins following a correct call are not overwhelming. The problem of one-sided series is more about preparation than conditions, I think. Three men in close on each side of the strip now, as Anderson krichs out a maiden, and that’s (another) over bowled.
Anyway, Chris Alton emails thusly: “Following on from Olivers point (over 134), I think it highlights something we saw in the Ashes: that we also miss a genuinely quick fast bowler. Someone who, to some extent, takes the pitch out of the equation.”
That’s Finn, I guess. He’s not quite fast, but he’s close and might get there again, - but crucially, has the variety of bounce. Otherwise, the various might feel that, in retrospect, Plunkett would’ve made more sense than Wood.
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136th over: Pakistan 458-4 (Malik 203, Shafiq 100) What an innings this has been from Shoaib. The pressure of the situation might not have been as intense as some, but the pressure he was under to score certainly was - likewise Shafiq. Not originally selected for the game, he brings up his ton with a four off Rashid and celebrates in similar manner to his pal. Those are the only runs from the over.
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135th over: Pakistan 454-4 (Malik 203, Shafiq 96) Shafiq clips to square-leg to bring up the 450, with one more needed for the 150 partnership. And there it is! And there’s Malik’s 200! Dabbed down to third man for two, he’s remarkably restrained in celebration - it’s hot out there - then kneels in prayer. He’s been in for 367 balls, not bad at all.
“I’m not sure if this has been covered,” posits Sean Duffy, “but I just wanted to brighten your day and point out before Malik hits his double ton that good old Mr Boycott declared him as being rubbish and not a good enough test player yesterday morning at about 6:55am. To look at this positively, imagine what well respected test cricketers such as Root, Cook, Bell will do on a track like this!”
Heh - I guess we’ll see. He’s certainly given the selectors pause, and wonder how long he has to make this a Grandaddy.
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134th over: Pakistan 449-4 (Malik 199, Shafiq 95) Rashid is milked for three singles, Malik paddling two of them to bring up his 199; he does not appear nervous as the field closes in according to common courtesy. He plays the final delivery of the over straight back to the bowler, and will have to wait to wave things.
“This test is really just underlining what we already knew” recons Oliver Smiddy – “that England are a genuine threat at home, with the wind behind them and a helpful pitch, but are a pretty toothless beast away from their comfort zone in less than ideal conditions. And that we lack a top-class spinner. And that playing two wicket keepers is dopey. And that Ali isn’t an opener (or at least shouldn’t be asked to open having bowled for 30+ overs in the first two days). I can’t see Pakistan batting again at this rate.”
Perhaps - but I’d think any attack would’ve found things difficult bowling first on this pitch in these conditions.
133rd over: Pakistan 445-4 (Malik 197, Shafiq 93) In comes Poorjimmy, bowling outside off and hoping, more or less. Single from the over.
“I hope England are bluffing with this talk of making Moeen open,” emails Phil White, “especially after all the bowling he’s done. They do after all have someone else in the team who used to be a specialist opener - a certain Joe Root.”
Ha. I must say, I don’t entirely grasp why Moeen is opening, because I can’t see any way it makes sense for him to do so in South Africa - or in the summer for that matter. So they’re ignoring, rather than attempting to solve a problem, and whoever is next will have a nasty attack on helpful tracks to acclimate instead of a decent shot as cashing in.
132nd over: Pakistan 444-4 (Malik 196, Shafiq 93) Rashid on, and the batters take a single each, inching towards their respective milestones. Question: is this wicket what we should want in Tests, give or take regional variations? Rewards good bowling and should deteriorate, but flat.
Morning everyone. So, this is lots of fun, isn’t it?
That’s drinks and Daniel Harris, ghost author of recent Kevin Pietersen book you can see shilled above, will take over for the rest of the day. Email him on daniel.harris.casual@theguardian.com.
131st over: Pakistan 442-4 (Malik 195, Shafiq 92)
Thats the end of the Root experiment. Anderson comes on to replace him as the England spinners claim an unwanted record: the most runs conceded by English spinners without taking a wicket. Anderson is tight, on target and consistent and bowls a maiden.
130th over: Pakistan 442-4 (Malik 195, Shafiq 92)
Rashid tosses one up above Malik’s eyeline, but he’s not falling for that. Instead he pushes Rashid’s second ball gently into the covers, runs a comfortable single, and is then delighted when Root attempts to hurl down the stumps only for the ball to fly to the boundary as overthrows. Five runs from the ball, five runs closer to his double ton. Shafiq then runs a spritely two after working Root to leg.
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129th over: Pakistan 435-4 (Malik 190, Shafiq 90)
Root continues from around the wicket and, when Shafiq gets on strike, he swats a short, wide ball outside off to the point boundary with the utter contempt the delivery deserved. The rest of the over is a masterclass in strike rotation by the Pakistan batsmen.
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128th over: Pakistan 428-4 (Malik 188, Shafiq 85)
Rashid finally replaces Moeen and he begins over the wicket. He was better around it earlier on, but starts OK this afternoon. Malik takes a couple of balls to get him in his sights, then launches him straight over his head for six.
“Prompted partly by a refreshingly traditional Test in tempo and style, and partly by a very quiet morning at work,” offers Chris Dale. “Does anybody else have a huge soft spot for Pakistan/England series? Beyond the persistent and entertaining niggle and bitchiness, there are so many memorable moments and spells. Shoaib Akhtar in 2005, Ajmal in 2011/12, Harmison’s Old Trafford spell in 2006, Broad’s 160 odd, England’s win in the dark in Karachi in 2000, and Inzy’s beautiful hit wicket against Monty. The series always seems to produce more interesting and memorable cricket, and individual peaks of performance.”
127th over: Pakistan 420-4 (Malik 181, Shafiq 84)
Root is as close to having Shafiq as anyone has been today. The batsman attempts to flog the bowler through mid on but he does not get hold of it. The ball falls slightly short of Bairstow who has to dive forwards to take it. Half a chance. Actually quarter of a chance, but Bairstow misses what is a very difficult take as the batsmen run two.
126th over: Pakistan 417-4 (Malik 181, Shafiq 81)
More Moeen and Malik, batting in a cap now rather than a helmet, blocks him for a single before Shafiq clips him for two. Shafiq lap sweeps Moeen but Buttler sees him coming and attempts to run behind the stumps to leg to head it off/catch it. He doesn’t make it, so Cook brings in a leg slip to head Shafiq off for the rest of the over. Six from the over as Pakistan continue to rotate the strike masterfully.
125th over: Pakistan 411-4 (Malik 180, Shafiq 76)
Joe Root does have that knack of taking a wicket when one is needed, partly because batsmen switch off a little when he comes on and partly because he’s better than they think. It helps that Buttler gives him the big build-up from behind the stumps. “Wooahh!” he yells to an innocuous ball outside off. “Wooaaahhhh!” he yelps to one that pitches on middle and does nothing. “OOOOhhhhh” he groans to a faster one that Shafiq plays at but misses. “Bah!” he thinks as Root bowls out a maiden.
124th over: Pakistan 411-4 (Malik 180, Shafiq 76)
The wicketless Moeen continues and the chanceless Pakistan batsmen continue to play him confidently. A fire alarm goes off in the ground, perhaps an England supporter making a comment on the state of things. Two from the over, and Cook will now to turn to Root. And why not? Almost everyone else has had a go.
123rd over: Pakistan 409-4 (Malik 179, Shafiq 75)
Another reason against bowling Moeen is that he rattles through the overs. The quick at the other end does not get much of a rest in between and so Broad is back, sweating up a storm, red faced underneath his white sun block. He drops a touch short and Shafiq turns him off his hip to the fine leg boundary for four. Cook abandons the experiment of having those short catchers in on the leg side and switches to one to the offside. It nearly brings an immediate result, with Shafiq swishing at a delivery outside the off stump as Broad changes his line. Shafiq hits the ground as the ball goes through, Buttler catches it, the England players go up and the umpire does not.
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122nd over: Pakistan 405-4 (Malik 179, Shafiq 71)
Moeen continues. Surely he can’t be allowed to bowl too many overs today. The quicks need protecting from the heat, clearly, but so does the opening bat. He’s into his 27th over of the innings and won’t want to bowl too many more given he’s likely to be facing a new ball around tea time. He gives up six from the over as Pakistan go past 400, this pair go past the 150-partnership milestone, and Moeen gets his century. His figures are 0-104.
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121st over: Pakistan 399-4 (Malik 174, Shafiq 70)
Broad finds a better line this over, keeping the ball on the straight and narrow but, three balls in, his left arm shoots out to his side as he runs in and he comes to an abrupt halt on his follow through. Is it serious? No. Turns out he’s thrown a puncture. His left boot has given up the battle and fallen apart. Liam Plunkett trots on with a new pair. Broad’s final delivery is squirted square through point to cries of “catch!”. Nothing doing though.
120th over: Pakistan 397-4 (Malik 174, Shafiq 68)
Moeen finds some turn for probably the first time all match. The ball clips Malik on the pad outside leg, bounces up to Buttler behind the stumps, and he catches it and appeals largely to pass the time.
119th over: Pakistan 396-4 (Malik 174, Shafiq 67)
Broad spears one into Shafiq’s feet and he squirts it away uppishly but safely through square leg, avoiding that ring of fielders in front of him. A few balls later, Brad gets his line wrong again, offering Malik width and he steers the ball to the point boundary for four. He changes tack and comes around the wicket, which will make life interesting for Buttler standing up behind the stumps, especially as his first delivery is well down the leg side. Buttler takes it very well, then threatens to stump Malik as he overbalances for a split second.
“Athers and Bumble going on about how you need to produce ‘wickets which make the captain think what they want to do’,” writes Krishana Patel. “Do you reckon the one sided matches in the Ashes have somewhat made us forget about how traditional (sub continental) Test matches are? The team batting first will generally bat till day two tea. Wait for the fourth and fifth day spin before judging this pitch I’d say.”
118th over: Pakistan 391-4 (Malik 170, Shafiq 66)
The Broad appeal prompted a dance from Wood in the outfield. There’s been so little action so far in the day, he’s probably right to throw some moves to celebrate a half-hearted LBW shout to a ball down the leg side. Moeen comes on from the pavilion end and Malik drives for two into the offside. Decent over from Moeen.
117th over: Pakistan 389-4 (Malik 168, Shafiq 66)
It’s Broad to open up after lunch, and Jos Buttler is standing up to the stumps to him. Presumably Broad will be bowling a few slower deliveries, plenty of cutters and no short ones. Anderson, Stokes and Rashid are in catching positions in a small circle from short mid on to short midwicket, with Cook stood behind all three of them in case Shafiq manages to chip all three of them. Funky. Broad experiments with an LBW shout, but the ball was heading down the leg side, and the over is a maiden.
The England bowlers have munched the crusts off their sandwiches, drunk the dregs of their cups of tea and, erm, filled up their ice vests with ice. They’re heading out onto the pitch as we speak. The Pakistan batsmen will be out shortly.
Still, Chris Jordan: (you’re in at short leg Belly)
So, Chris Jordan in for Finn. Feels an odd one - he came back at the end of the season strongly for Sussex but does he offer anything different from Stokes or Wood? Not really. Bumble, on the telly, makes the case for calling up a left armer to, one, vary the line and, two, cause some rough for the spinners. Jordan is a decent reverse swinger, but wouldn’t David Willey or Mark Footitt have been a better choice?
LUNCH
Well, it’s certainly been Pakistan’s morning. Absolutely serene progress after a virtually chanceless morning that will have had England fearing the worst. Anderson and Broad bowled well enough, Wood was clearly told to bowl straight and strayed a bit to leg, while neither spinner really offered control or threat - though, having said that, Rashid did look much better from around the wicket. A tough morning for England, and a very good one for Pakistan.
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116th over: Pakistan 389-4 (Malik 168, Shafiq 66)
Shafiq clips Wood to leg, bringing Malik on strike. Cook brings another man in next to Anderson at schoolboy silly mid on hoping he can repeat the trick that caught Younes Khan out against Stuart Broad. Malik dinks one along the ground to Anderson in that very position, and he turns around to throw the non-striker’s stumps down … only to discover that Shafiq has been backing up approximately 1mm and has absolutely no interest in a quick single. And that’s lunch – much to England’s relief.
115th over: Pakistan 388-4 (Malik 168, Shafiq 65)
Broad makes a good diving stop at midwicket as Shafiq looks to work Stokes to the legside boundary. Meanwhile, here’s the full story on that Finn news.
114th over: Pakistan 387-4 (Malik 168, Shafiq 64)
Hmm, Cook gives Rashid the hook and brings on Wood. An odd one, given that in his last over Rashid had both batsmen as close to trouble as they’ve been in all morning. James Anderson is in at schoolboy silly mid on - ie about four yards in front of the non-striking batsman on the edge of the strip. Wood’s fourth ball is a peach, a reversing yorker into Malik’s feet that entirely takes the dead pitch out of the equation and risks him lofting the ball to that schoolboy silly mid on. Perhaps that hint of reverse is why Wood’s been called into the attack.
Meanwhile, poor old Finny:
Gutted to be heading home from this UAE tour. Going to have to get better at using these things, blooming hard work! pic.twitter.com/lJqdfMuhTn
— Steven Finn (@finnysteve) October 14, 2015
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113th over: Pakistan 387-4 (Malik 168, Shafiq 64)
Stokes is worked for two then one by Shafiq, before Malik too milks him for a single. Shafiq finishes the over with a legside clip for four. Aside from two half chances in the last over, and one legside strangle quarter chance off Wood, the Pakistan batsmen have offered England no encouragement whatsoever this morning.
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112th over: Pakistan 379-4 (Malik 167, Shafiq 61)
Rashid drifts too wide of off stump and Shafiq carves a powerful cut through the covers for four. Rashid is getting lots of turn, but in that instance it simply gave Shafiq all the more room in which to operate. Two balls later, though, and Rashid very nearly has Shafiq. He pitches the ball on leg and turns it past off. The batsman attempted to close the blade on the ball and turn it around the corner, but veyr nearly edges it to Buttler instead. And then again, two balls later, Malik plays straight but down the wrong line and he too nearly edges behind. Rashid deserves a wicket - from around the wicket today he has been very solid.
111th over: Pakistan 374-4 (Malik 167, Shafiq 56)
Stokes has replaced Moeen, and he lets Malik know what he’s in for by directing a good short ball across his bows. Buttler and the slips are having to stand much closer than they would normally to Stokes with the ball hardly carrying through at all. A maiden.
Just wondering if that Jordan selection is Bell-inspired. Would be a handy 12th man in the slips, of course …
110th over: Pakistan 374-4 (Malik 167, Shafiq 56)
Shafiq leans back and wafts a Rashid delivery to the sweeper cleaning up on the off side as Pakistan simply bat and bat. It brings Malik on strike and Cook brings in two very close slips as Rashid begins to look more threatening. It doesn’t stop him being milked for singles though, or indeed from Shafiq clubbing him for four over mid on.
A bit of breaking news: Steven Finn has been ruled out of the series because of a stress injury to his left foot. He has been replaced by Chris Jordan. As if to prove it, the TV pictures cut to the poor bowler hobbling up the stairs in the stand on crutches.
109th over: Pakistan 367-4 (Malik 165, Shafiq 51)
Malik trots down the wicket to Moeen, who is also bowling around the wicket, and thumps him over mid off for four. A single brings Shafiq on strike and Moeen goes back over the wicket. There’s something very pleasant about watching two spinners go about their business against two very competent batsmen with pictures beamed in from thousands of miles away. Something’s right in the world when Test cricket whispers quietly by in faraway countries.
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108th over: Pakistan 362-4 (Malik 160, Shafiq 51)
Buttler spotted Shafiq getting down early for a sweep and charged quickly to leg to block the ball’s passage. But to no avail, the batsman still gets Rashid away for one. Malik is then surprised by a Rashid googly from wide around the wicket, as is the bowler when he manages to land it from the looks of things, but he still blocks it out.
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107th over: Pakistan 360-4 (Malik 159, Shafiq 50)
Malik prods to mid on and walks a single. This has all the calm serenity of a gentle Sunday game in the vicarage back garden at the moment. Were it not for the fact it’s being played in searing heat and there are minarets in the background, of course. Shafiq drives and runs a tight single to bring up his 50 as Ian Bell puts his head back in his hands somewhere in the field. Then Malik rounds things off by stepping back and picking off a short ball through the covers for four. Lovely shot.
106th over: Pakistan 354-4 (Malik 154, Shafiq 49)
Buttler goes up for a ludicrous lbw appeal as Rashid continues from around the wicket and pitches one about two postcodes outside leg. Still, Rashid has bowled much better from around the wicket and even finds a little bounce. He has more control from here and keeps Shafiq at bay who is looking for the run to bring him his 50.
105th over: Pakistan 353-4 (Malik 153, Shafiq 49)
Moeen, quicker and tight to the stumps, keeps things quiet at his end too. But Malik does carve him through the off to bring up this pair’s 100 partnership. And very well done to them. Shafiq rounds things off with a deft, dinked sweep that goes very fine for two.
104th over: Pakistan 350-4 (Malik 152, Shafiq 47)
No short leg for Rashid now, just a slip, and he continues that line from very wide around the wicket. It’s a much more defensive angle from which to bowl and does at least stop the runs but makes a wicket far less likely. Shafiq sweeps him for one, before Malik brings up the Pakistan 350 with a hoik through midwicket.
103rd over: Pakistan 348-4 (Malik 151, Shafiq 46)
Moeen continues, Shafiq taking a single off his second delivery. Malik attempts to cut him hard later in the over, but his line is good and he fails to get him properly away.
102nd over: Pakistan 347-4 (Malik 151, Shafiq 45)
Rashid continues from around the wicket to Shafiq and get one to turn sharply across the face of the bat. Shafiq takes a two from it, before cutting hard later in the over for another couple. Rashid is bowling from very wide of the crease, really trying to find an angle to knock either of these batsmen out of kilter.
101st over: Pakistan 342-4 (Malik 151, Shafiq 40)
Moeen replaces Wood. I’d have been tempted to give Wood another over directing some short stuff at Malik but he had been expensive. Shafiq, then Malik work singles off Moen before the former has an unholy slog through mid off, catches the bottom of the bat and sends the ball just wide of the fielder. A bit lucky, but he gets four. And that’s drinks.
100th over: Pakistan 335-4 (Malik 150, Shafiq 34)
Rashid, Cook and Root have a long chat before the spinner’s 21st over, and his first ball to Shafiq draws the batsman into a swish outside off that has the slip and keeper briefly interested. He’s trying to bowl faster now, but Shafiq can still cut him through the covers for one. That’s Rashid’s 100 up. Time for a change, he reckons, so he goes around the wicket and Malik blocks his final two deliveries of the over.
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99th over: Pakistan 334-4 (Malik 150, Shafiq 33)
Wood is again too straight and Shafiq clips him for a single off his hips. He bowls shorter and outside off to Malik, giving it everything to get the ball to first bounce to chest height, and then force the batmsan to duck. It’s not a bad tactic this: bowling full and straight has not worked so far so why not have a go at short and fast for an over or two? Malik responds by pushing another short delivery uppishly through gully for four for his 150, but his shot wasn’t entirely convincing.
98th over: Pakistan 329-4 (Malik 146, Shafiq 32)
Malik is having none of Rashid. He takes two steps down the wicket and clobbers him straight back down the ground for four. Rashid hardly helps his cause when he tosses Malik a full toss a few balls alter: six runs. Rashid’s figures on his Test debut are a wince-inducing (but a little misleading) 0-99 at the moment.
97th over: Pakistan 319-4 (Malik 136, Shafiq 32)
Wood strays too far to leg again, and Shafiq swings but tickles behind. The ball drops short of Buttler, diving to his left, and rolls to the boundary. Shafiq makes the most of it by driving Wood, who is again too straight, through wide mid on for another boundary. Wood rediscovers his line, finds off stump again, then bangs in a couple of shorter ones. Shafiq ducks the first then chops the second to point.
96th over: Pakistan 311-4 (Malik 136, Shafiq 24)
Rashid lets one drift too far down the leg side and is clipped for three, before Malik trots down the wickets and dinks him over the top (a little unconvincingly) for two, before taking a single a couple of bals later. Shafiq spots a googly and works Rashid for one more, before Malik cuts him hard for four. Not a great over that.
“The disappointing crowds are just part of the nature of working life here in the UAE,” writes Paddy Murphy from Dubai. “ Few of the Pakistani expatriates in the UAE will be able to just take a day’s leave to watch the cricket. They ought to be a lot better on Friday though, when many will have the day off – presuming England last that far. Perhaps even tomorrow which is a public holiday in the UAE.”
95th over: Pakistan 300-4 (Malik 129, Shafiq 20)
Wood replaces Broad and strays onto Malik’s pads, from where he is worked for a single. He does the same to Shafiq but the ball goes through to Buttler after clipping his pad. A brief appeal is turned down by Paul Reiffel, before Shafiq clips a third leg side delivery to the leg side boundary for three to bring up Pakistan’s 300. Wood has been given some protection on the leg side by Cook, so it would seem he has been told to bowl very straight but the line has not been quite right so far. His final delivery is much better: full and on middle stump, Shafiq edges along the ground to the slips.
94th over: Pakistan 296-4 (Malik 128, Shafiq 17)
Anderson’s opening spell is over, and Cook turns to Rashid to see what he can do. It took him a while to bowl his googly yesterday, but he attempts one third ball today which is good to see. Fifth ball, he saw Shafiq coming down the wicket and slipped him another one which nearly does for the batsman. Shafiq gives Rashid a wry smile after bunting the wrong ‘un to the covers.
93rd over: Pakistan 294-4 (Malik 128, Shafiq 15)
A run! In fact: tree! Shafiq pushes Broad through mid off for two and gets such a head rush that he whips him square off his legs for another single.
Meanwhile, here’s an exciting story from Pakistan. Ahmad Shahzad has denied that he used to act as Shahid Afridi’s “personal servant” and has rebutted the former Pakistan Cricket Board chief Ijaz Butt’s allegations that he used “to put shoes on Afridi’s feet in the dressing room”.
92nd over: Pakistan 291-4 (Malik 128, Shafiq 12)
Anderson has just the two slips in for Malik now, and is keeping his bowling gun barrel straight. He sends down a slightly shorter cross seam delivery which Malik leaves well alone, then a fuller delivery on middle and off which is defended calmly. Malik is giving off the impression that he is not going anywhere soon.
91st over: Pakistan 291-4 (Malik 128, Shafiq 12)
There’s a quiet calm about play so far, the two Pakistan batsmen seem serene and comfortable enough as the England bowlers probe the off stump. Broad has bowled largely on a length but midway through this over he digs in couple of short balls, which Shafiq ducks easily enough. Another maiden.
90th over: Pakistan 291-4 (Malik 128, Shafiq 12)
Shafiq gets off the mark for the day with a back foot push to mid off. It brings Malik to the crease, who plays an immaculate forward defence, a couple of leaves, then pushes Anderson elegantly to the fence for four. Might be long day for England …
89th over: Pakistan 286-4 (Malik 124, Shafiq 11)
Broad takes up the four-over-old ball at the other end. There are two slips and a gully in for Malik, and none of them will be heartened by Broad’s second delivery, which barely gets up above ankle height. Broad strays a touch too straight and Malik plays him off the hips, before attempting a scampered single. Wood’s throw sends him scurrying back to his crease though. Another maiden.
88th over: Pakistan 286-4 (Malik 124, Shafiq 11)
Jimmy Anderson gets things started, and the first thing to note is that Alastair Cook has come out of the slips after splitting the webbing on his hand and Joe Root has come in at first slip (and is singing along to the few England fans who are in and who are singing Jerusalem). Bell is still in at second slip. Anderson sends down an over on or around off stump to Shafiq who leaves outside off and plays straight to anything on the stumps. A maiden.
England are out in the field, the batsmen are striding to the middle and the spectator is in the stands. Play in a few minutes.
Jimmy Anderson has been describing the regime post-play. More or less as you would expect: cold baths straight off the field, a massage, a good meal and then a good night’s sleep.
He’s relatively sanguine about the two dropped catches off his bowling - disappointing, he says, which I doubt was the word he used in the dressing room. “It happens,” he adds. “It’s frustrating but Belly’s taken some fantastic catches off my bowling in the past. In cricket you have days like that.”
He says pitches like this are difficult to get in on, so you must put pressure on batsmen early on. Also he echoes his comments pre-series: that the bowlers will only be used in short spells so they have to be on it from the first ball. He seems confident and happy that England are in a decent position.
As for Younis Khan, he was delighted to pass Javed Miandad’s target of 8,832 runs to become Pakistan’s leading run scorer. “It was a huge target for me. I knew if I pushed myself I could pass the great Javed. I now want to become the first Pakistani to pass 10,000 runs and, if I work hard, I think will achieve my goal.”
So only another 1,150 or so runs to get. Probably get those in the second innings on this wicket.
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Stuart Broad was very open after the the first day’s play, admitting his fault in having Shoaib Malik caught off a no ball. “I have to hold my hand up and say the no-ball was unacceptable, certainly in these conditions. I’m not a huge no-ball bowler but there’s no excuses. I said sorry to the guys at tea because we don’t need to be getting any chalked off here. It is something we need to improve on.”
Then he stuck up for Bell, who didn’t face the media. “Ian is disappointed. He has his head in his hands in the changing room. The first one was a tricky catch, low to his left. That second one you would expect him to take 99 times out of 100.
“It is different fielding at slip here. You have to stand closer and edges come faster and lower. We’ve worked hard at our low catching and, while no one means to drop them, we spoke about making sure we’re mentally switched on in the late sessions.”
Of the conditions, he said England have some tactics they have learned from Mahela Jayawardene for dealing with the heat. But not many. “He told us that, if you are feeling your mind drift a little bit, put your hand up to switch positions because it is roasting hot, probably the hottest I’ve experienced.”
Preamble
If Ian Bell drops two catches in the slips but there is not a soul in the crowd there to see it happen, has it really happened? I suspect that was probably not the line he would have taken to Jimmy Anderson in the dressing room after depriving him of a four-fer on a wicket that is flatter than a Bolivian salt flat that has undergone extensive lump smoothing. The first drop was forgivable to an extent – low chances being tougher than the high ones – but shouldn’t Alastair Cook have had him out of there shortly afterwards? A confidence player like Bell, when low on confidence, is something of a hazard in a key position where chances must be taken, surely? And the second chance was a dolly.
But to look at the positives: Anderson could have taken four wickets yesterday on a wicket that is flatter than etc and so on. Also, that last chance – when Bell dropped Asad Shafiq – came in nearly the last over of the day, suggesting England’s bowlers have the fitness to keep making things happen late on under a punishing sun. It also came with a new ball that will only be slightly less new this morning, so there is a chance that after an ice bath and night’s kip Anderson and co can do the same again today. In fact, England’s bowlers were generally excellent on day one with Broad only let down by taking a wicket on a no ball, Wood consistent and accurate, Moeen more convincing and Rashid slowly coming into the game on his debut.
England will have known that the aim of the game was to keep the runs down because Pakistan will always be able to take wickets in these conditions, even if they’re without a key spinner. So to have had the chance to go in last night with Pakistan 286-7, only for them to actually be 286-4, does put England significantly on the back foot. Still, well played Malik – whose 124* comes after five years out of Test cricket and 11 months without first class cricket – and Mohammed Hafeez, who deserved a century yesterday and was unlucky to fall short on 98. But the innings of the day was Younis Khan’s, a gallivanting 38 from 57 balls that made him the most prolific Pakistani run scorer of all time, and for a brief period made the four people who have bought tickets to the match slightly smug that they were there to witness it.
In the meantime, needs must and all that when it comes to Pakistan, but surely something needs to be done about Test cricket being played in front of two men and a dog? Anyone not fully aware of the circumstances would be forgiven for wondering quite what the point of it all was. And by anyone not fully aware of the circumstances, I mean a lot of people under the age of 18 who might be wondering just what is so great about Test cricket as opposed to, say, T20 or laughing gas, and won’t get much of an answer from watching two sides flog it out on a flat wicket in front of no people.
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