The Queen records her Christmas broadcast at Buckingham Palace. Could you do better? Photograph: Fiona Hanson/AFP
"Well, we've had a smashing year, here at Dunroamin! The borders are flourishing, and we even had our first gardenia! Julian's passed all his GCSEs with all A stars, and the dog's had a marvellous litter of pure pedigree show puppies!..."
Says a little voice from one corner of your eBay homepage. Is it some new annoying campaign from the internet auctioneers? Have you been hacked by the WI? No. It is one lucky eBay bidder, making their very own seasonal address to the nation. But WHY?
Well, this year, eBay and the NSPCC are offering bidders the chance to both give to charity AND record their own Christmas message at once. Granted, you could just record one on your webcam and stick it up on YouTube, but that's not the point right now. You would also be giving to the NSPCC, which would be a nice thing. Apparently there'll be a professional film crew come to your house record and edit it, and then it'll take up one of the advertising spaces on eBay's front page. Where it might receive more than three times the audience of the Queen's speech! (Well, based on usual visitor figures, but really, unless you're trying to flog your gifts as soon as unwrap them, who's on eBay on Christmas day?)
It's certainly an unusual thing to do - and an innovative way of raising money for charity. But who would want to do that? Someone wanting to propose in an exciting public way? Someone wanting to air their grievances to an audience of invited friends and family (and several million other people trying to sell electric toothbrushes while drunk on sherry)? Perhaps someone with a message of hope, or a vision of a better world that they're desperate to share, someone who just wants to do something for the NSPCC, or just some fame-hungry twonk who has failed to get on Big Brother eight years running. But how much is such an opportunity worth to these people? And what would you say - and, most importantly, if Mrs Queen is wanting to embrace her people and this is where her people are: wouldn't it be a good idea if she just started bidding herself?
