Oscars 2009: Our drinking game - the photographic evidence

The red carpet coverage is still trundling on and Jack is hungry, thirsty and raring to go Photograph: Guardian

It's beginning! Jack gets in the mood Photograph: Guardian

Jack enjoys Hugh Photograph: Guardian

But, oh no, he's mentioned the recession. It's a chocolate coin. Or, in leiu of a chocolate coin, a chocolate gold bunny Photograph: Guardian

A toast for Penelope Cruz - we forgot to put anything for Vicki Christina Barcelona Photograph: Guardian

Jack has some mango and a Strongbow instead of a lassi to celebrate Slumdog's secreenplay win Photograph: Guardian

Milk! Milk Photograph: Guardian

It's jelly time - Milk screenwriter Dustin Lance Black thanked their agent Photograph: Guardian

Wall-E wins animated feature Photograph: Guardian

Jack has a banana to mark a weighty-Oscar joke on the part of the best animated short winner Photograph: Guardian

A jelly/M&M one-two combo to celebrate an agent/cast thankathon by The Duchess's costume designer, Michael O'Connor Photograph: Guardian/Guardian

Pushing the Ovaltine button for the Benjamin team's art direction and make up wins Photograph: Guardian/Guardian

Go Mango! Slumdog wins best cinematography. Jack wins one of his five-a-day Photograph: Guardian

A short break (we didn't think of anything for short film (live action) winner Spielzeugland ... foolish, very foolish) gives Jack time to contemplate the long road ahead ... Photograph: Guardian/Guardian

A much-deserved best supporting actor win for the late Heath Ledger (The Dark Knight). A somewhat less deserved sip of another dark knight for our own caped crusader Photograph: Guardian

Documentary short goes to Smile Pinki. Pinky goes to an increasing smiley Jack Photograph: Guardian

A quick-fire four awards presented by Will Smith. Our guinea pig's thoughts on Big Will: "He's nothing without Jazzy Jeff" ... ... or his multi-million dollar salary, impossible good looks or boundless charisma. There's no telling a drinker. Anyway, Benjamin Button takes the visual effects gong, so Jack takes another hit of Ovaltine ... Photograph: Guardian

... washed down with a swig of Baileys for The Dark Knight's sound editing win ... Photograph: Guardian

... and rounded off with a couple of chomps of mango in tribute to Slumdog Millionaire's Ian Tapp, Richard Pryke and Resul Pookutty (sound mixing) and Chris Dickens (film editing) Photograph: Guardian

More Slumdog (for A.R. Rahman's score) = more mango Photograph: Guardian

Six awards for Slumdog with A.R.Rahman's second win (for best song). Jack, anticipating more wins for Danny Boyle's masterpiece, simply decides to wear the mango Photograph: Guardian

Hugh Jackman mentions Obama. You at home should be on the deep crust pizza. Jack, a man of more refined tastes, opts for a daub of deliciously gooey camembert Photograph: Guardian

Spotting a few false smiles in the audience as the nominations for best director are read out, Jack reaches for a pickled onion ... Photograph: Guardian

... and gets reacquainted with mango as the lovely Danny Boyle takes best director Photograph: Guardian

Golden statue for Winslet. Bottle of red for Arnott, who by now is skilfully playing the part of 'sober journalist' Photograph: Guardian

Jack endorses Sean Penn's love for "Commie, homo-loving sons of guns" by taking a glug of the white stuff ... Photograph: Guardian

... and celebrates Slumdog's best film win by swooping on his favourite drink of the night, the pink bubbly. After twelve drinks he's held it together pretty well considering Photograph: Guardian

Well, sort of ... Photograph: Guardian

Slumdog's big night proves too much for Jack, who takes a moment to gather ... Photograph: Guardian

... thank the academy ... Photograph: Guardian

... and survey his handiwork. Goodnight and good luck, Jack. Photograph: Guardian