Nicole Kidman is winning the divorce with Keith Urban. Obviously. What man in their right mind would think that springing a marital breakup on a woman who not only survived but thrived divorcing Tom Cruise would do anything less?
Everyone wants to “win” the breakup, to be the one seeming classy and hot and unbothered. The stakes are just ten times higher when you’re a superstar. For her first public appearance since the news broke that Urban was over their 19-year marriage, Kidman went hard.
She arrived at Paris Fashion Week’s hottest show — Matthieu Blazy’s debut as Chanel’s creative director — wearing a crisp oversized white shirt from the collection and sporting a fringe. A drastic haircut that includes bangs, as the Americans call them, is the breakup cliche hairstyle attempted at your own risk, but Kidman looks incredible with them. She is the queen of the red carpet wig, so they may well be a clip-in hairpiece, but my God. Give her hair/wig stylist a raise.
The theme was Space, and the actor looked out of this world. Oh, and she’s Chanel’s new House Ambassador, some 20 years after she was the face of Chanel No 5. Talk about power moves. The photo of her stepping out of a car, the epitome of a casual smokeshow, was the social media post seen around the world. Every queer woman on my newsfeed was offering their hand in her third marriage.
Kidman, 58, was flanked by her daughters from her marriage to Urban, Sunday Rose, 17, and Faith Margaret, 14. Another incredible power move, showing a united family front on the FROW everyone wanted to be seated at. The family photo op was precisely timed with her formal filing for divorce in a Nashville course, complete with a plan for Kidman to take main custody of the girls. Her message was clear — she’s their mother, and she’s Mother.
Urban, 57, has not been coming off anywhere near as well. First there’s the reports about his “cocaine clause” in their prenuptial agreement. Kidman, famously, was instrumental in assisting the rocker in getting sober. Apparently this extended to Urban bagging $600,000 for every year he remained off the gear in the event of their divorce. It’s kind of giving the A-list equivalent of your parents promising you a tenner if you get good grades.
Then there was the lyric change snafu. Urban is currently on his High and Alive Tour with his band, which includes 25-year-old guitarist Maggie Baugh. Baugh shared a clip to Instagram a few days before the divorce news broke that appears to show Urban changing the words of his song The Fighter, which he wrote about Kidman in the early days of their romance, to be about Baugh.
Famous husbands getting weird about their famous wives doing their literal job is another tired trope
Instead of “when they’re tryna get to you, baby, I’ll be the fighter” — lyrics he dedicated to Kidman in a pledge to protect her from the world — Urban crooned “when they’re tryna get to you, Maggie, I’ll be your guitar player”. There’s absolutely no suggestion of anything romantic between the bandmates, and Baugh has an age-appropriate boyfriend of her own back in Nashville. But it just comes off as pretty petty and pathetic, especially now he’s appearing onstage without his wedding ring.
On top of this, tabloids stories are appearing spreading rumours that Urban was displeased by Kidman’s run of hit films and tv shows where she plays a sexy, hot older married lady having lots of sex. Baby Girl, of course, where Kidman enters a horny submissive situationship with her intern. The Perfect Couple, where she’s an ice cold wife having hate sex up against a window. Famous husbands getting weird about their famous wives doing their literal job is another tired trope. It’s also a baffling one. Oh no, my partner is simply too sexy and successful and earning oodles of cash. Cry more.
But there seems to be a kernel of truth in there, that Urban is yet another man who feels jilted by his more successful wife. Ed Potton, a journalist at The Times, recalled his “snippy” recent interview with Urban, where the conversation became markedly strained every time the journalist tried to bring up Kidman. I suppose it would grate, knowing that the press is only feigning interest in your career because you’re married to someone exponentially more famous. But thems the breaks. He could have just been happy for her and enjoyed the ride.
Even if Urban had played the divorce perfectly, however, it was always a losing game. This is the woman who unwittingly became the defining breakup glow-up meme. You know the photo. A grainy shot of Kidman in a gauzy summer top, capri pants and kitten heels, face scrunched up in triumph as she punches the air clutching a sheaf of paper.
Booked, busy and unbothered as she pushes 60
Internet urban legend has it that this photo captured the moment Kidman obtained her divorce from her first husband, Cruise, an incredibly famous and powerful man who is also deep into Scientology. Kidman has since demurred on the photos origins, insisting in interviews that it was a shot from an unidentified film she was acting in. At this point the truth of the photograph doesn’t matter - everyone sees her as a woman who revels in being free from a man.
So the Chanel moment, and everything that comes after it, will be an unalloyed victory lap for Kidman. Booked, busy and unbothered as she pushes 60, an icon for women ageing into their power. Let’s not forget, this is the star who has fulfilled her vow to work with women directors to raise their profile in the industry, racking up 27 of them in eight years and consistently pushing for financial backing for women-led projects.
However heartbroken and hurt she may be in private, she can add the trophy for divorce to her pile of Academy Awards and Golden Globes. Urban will simply become a footnote in her story.
