Anyone who sat through the full 120 minutes of “action” that masqueraded as the last-16 meeting between Croatia and Portugal may be asking a simple question: was it the worst game in history at a major tournament?
Uefa’s statistics show there were two shots on target, both from Portugal, while Croatia failed to trouble opposing keeper Rui Patrício even once. Yet numbers alone barely begin to do justice to the painful, turgid awfulness of it all. No one could blame Croatia for trying to stifle the supply line to Cristiano Ronaldo, but reducing the Real Madrid man to a peripheral figure seemed to be the height of their ambition. Portugal, for their part, were barely less bereft of ideas, intent and inspiration. And with neither team able to string two passes together, action and incident were about as rare as Ivan Perisic’s hairdo.
By the time Ricardo Quaresma finally put the watching world out of its misery with three minutes of extra time remaining, heading home from a couple of yards, it was the first time either keeper had been troubled all night. Yet even that felt like an injustice: penalties were surely the least those who had endured the preceding 117 minutes deserved. Leave Europe? If this is the best it can offer, it’s a no-brainer.
Has there ever been a worst match at a major tournament?
