
In a welcome slice of eat-the-rich poetic justice, one of Lauren Sánchez’s wedding dresses appears to have vanished, just days after she married billionaire Jeff Bezos at a star-studded and controversial ceremony in Venice.
Rumblings of the missing dress — one of 27 Sánchez reportedly packed for the days-long festivities — come courtesy of Italian outlet Corriere della Sera, which recently published claims that the dress was stolen.
The only thing more heartening than reading about a billionaire’s allegedly stolen dress (she’ll recover, I promise), is reading it in beautiful Italian prose.

According to the article, some locals speculated the dress was thieved, Robin Hood-style, by a gatecrasher who evaded security at San Giorgio, the island where the newlyweds exchanged rings last week.
Apparently, the number of gatecrashers at the event was so high that officers in Italy’s anti-terrorism squad were called to the island in response.
The lore only deepened from there, with some Venetians claiming another vintage Dolce & Gabbana dress, owned by either Sánchez or Ivanka Trump, was allegedly torn and set alight during another wedding-related party.
Whoever this alleged dress-snatcher is needs to sell the rights for a biopic, stat. Just don’t cast Charlize Theron.
Those familiar with the story confirmed that a dress went missing but denied it was stolen. The sources stressed that no legal complaint about the garment had been made to police. It’s not known exactly which dress went missing or when.

Instead, the sources said they were hoping the dress would eventually “turn up”, which is the same expectation I’ve had about my car keys that disappeared in the summer of ‘18.
Regardless of whether Sánchez finds the dress (my wish is that an Italian nonna wears it to dinner sometime), the wedding caused fanfare well beyond the bride’s wardrobe.
From its reported (and sickening) $85 million price tag to its slammed leaked invites and swathes of local protests, the nuptials were the talk of the town… though not exactly in a good way.
Anyway, I’m gonna check eBay for a hopefully discounted wedding dress from a Venetian seller.
Lead images: Lauren Sánchez/Instagram
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