Like some kind of essence-of-hot-hatch, the Peugeot 208 GTi has everything that is good about a small, poky motor, and everything bad, in amplified amounts. Almost nothing troubles this 1.6L petrol engine. It’s extremely responsive, and with a 0 to 62mph of 6.5 seconds, is not one of those little noise buckets that is all gong and no dinner.
I can well imagine it being the car du choix of one of those young men who ferries all his friends about on a Saturday night because he prefers driving to drinking. It would also make a good getaway vehicle, apart from its flamboyant pearlised exterior, and the quite flashy cabin – red trim, executive seats, dinky touchscreen – which might distract said person from getting away. The steering is springy and headstrong; it’s a bit of a surprise when you nudge it and it doesn’t take any notice. I’m pretty confident that you’d make your own mental adjustment to that after a while. The Torsen differential delivers torque to the front wheel with the most traction, which is really fun on a corner and probably even more fun in tricky conditions, though I found no ice in Sussex. The brakes are dependable, but when you hit them hard, the back feels a bit bouncy. There are people who would enjoy this. I’m not one of them.
Downsides: it rattles at speed. One time, it was so noisy that I couldn’t hear the satnav – which, otherwise, was speedy and intuitive. The suspension is incredibly hard, and the ride is bumpy. The mister said that if I took a sleeping policeman at that speed again, I’d be looking for a new husband, and I asked him if he was using his libido as a weapon. He said he wasn’t talking about his libido, but his actual testicles, and then the seven-year-old said “What’s libido?” and the five-year-old said “What are testicles?” I realised they never sincerely want to know the meaning of any words, it’s all just an elaborate double-handed mockery.
Emissions have been pared right down; they’re still not perfect, but it’s hard to see how they could have been brought any lower without that being the specific raison d’être of the car. Fuel economy is also pretty good; the combined economy as advertised is 52.3mpg. I imagine you can put a dent in that with your driving style, if you are constantly over-revving for a laugh. So don’t do that, OK? It’s not big, and it’s not clever. This car, meanwhile, is not big either, but it has a native, superficially retro, deep-down forward-thinking intelligence that I think will take it pretty far.
Peugeot 208 GTi: in numbers
Price £21,995 OTR
Top speed 143mph
Acceleration 0-62mph in 6.5 seconds
Combined fuel consumption 52.3mpg
CO2 emissions 125g/km
Eco rating 7/10
Cool rating 7/10
