As London sweats its way through yet another heatwave, we’re having to learn to adapt. There’s the restless nights. The complexity of choosing outfits which are right for both sweltering tubes and freezing offices. Fitness fanatics, though, have extra heavy lifting to do.
Sure, we now know about the importance of hydrating religiously and getting workouts done before the sun turns savage. But we know less about how to exercise considerately when drenched in all that extra sweat.
Because no one wants to saddle-up in someone else’s sweaty bum print, here’s some all-important guidance around the most hotly debated issues.
Can I exercise outdoors sans vest?
How much flesh is too much flesh? We hear you ask. And while a vest might feel revealing enough, running coach Sabrina Pace-Humphreys insists: “When it comes to keeping cool, less is definitely more.” She advises wearing a sweat-wicking bra top and shorts so that perspiration can evaporate more efficiently and cool the body more quickly. Considering she’s run the Marathon de Stables in the Sahara desert, I’ll take her advice.
For cyclists, unless you’re stew.crw, naked torsos are harder to justify, what with all that extra relative wind. Middle-Aged Men In Lycra, unzip your jersey if you must. But full torso display should result in immediate ostracisation. Topless walking is also a hard ‘no’, unless you want to look like Ray Winstone strutting down the Costa del Sol. This applies to ripped bodies too.
But what about at the gym?
Gym bunnies are going to have to feel the heat because the general consensus here is a hard ‘no.’ Not just because, for many, our days of socially acceptable abs are long gone. But because by wicking away the extra sweat, those vests prevent innocent bystanders from getting showered in perspiration (which contains urea, one of the ingredients in pee - mmm).
As personal trainer Aimee Victoria Long says, “A heatwave isn’t an excuse to turn the gym into your personal sauna scene. So keep your shirt on. Sweaty skin plus shared benches is a recipe for instant unpopularity.”
To wipe or not to wipe?
There’s nothing more maddening than waiting for the leg press as a sweaty beefcake uses his twentieth minute on the machine to leisurely text his mate in between sipping a Huel shake. Actually, there is. It’s even more annoying to plonk yourself down in his perspiration puddle once he’s finally finished.
In a post-pandemic world ruled by the omnipresent antibac wipe dispenser, there’s little excuse not to wipe. Except perhaps an objection on environmental grounds. In which case, grab a towel. Maybe even two.
Fitfluencer Sarah Campus says, “You need one towel as a barrier between you and shared equipment and a second towel to mop yourself mid-workout. This isn’t just polite, it's hygienic. When it’s hot, bacteria thrives.”
Can I take a gym selfie?
Gym selfies, which IMO are an evergreen crime against workout etiquette, become utterly unacceptable when we’re slipping like Bambi on sweaty mats and our exhausted faces are even more slimy than normal. “No one looks good in a sweaty selfie,” says personal coach Monty Simmons. “If you want to show everyone how red your face gets, go ahead. But the drowned-rat look should stay private.”
What shall I wear to the pool?
When it comes to swimwear, too many gymgoers treat the pool like the Côte d'Azur. By all means, ladies, feel free to wear a stylish one-piece. But save your thong bikini for the beach. And men? We may be in the middle of Thigh Guy Summer, but that does not give you permission to go full Speedo. Please remember we’re uptight Brits, not laidback Gauls. As Simmons says, “Unless you’re on a specific kind of beach at a specific kind of hour, keep your trunks at least a third of the way down your thighs.”
Is my water bottle obnoxious?
Ever since hydration became a lifestyle choice (thank you, TikTok), water bottles have gotten supersized. These in-yer-face status symbols are annoying — especially when used to surreptitiously reserve the lat pulldown machine — but there is actually justification for a two-litre bottle. During heatwaves, experts actually recommend three-litres of water a day.
Dr Harry Jarrett, Head of Science and Research at supplement brand Heights, says, “We need to consume at least 1.5 times the amount of fluid lost through sweat, ideally within two hours of finishing exercise.” Just please remember you’re not the only gymgoer who needs the water fountain.
Do NOT hog the fan
Those giant industrial eyesores — aka AC units — suddenly become every gymgoer’s best friend during a heatwave. We all want that icy blast while soaking up the 1980s music video vibes, but most are too polite to dominate the sweet spot. Most. For the few that feel entitled to it, please heed Long’s wise words: “Don’t hog the fan like it’s a VIP section at a club, share the breeze.”
The new changing room rules
As most UK changing rooms are yet to catch-up with the concept of air conditioning, getting dressed can feel like hitting the sauna. Especially when someone insists on using the hairdryer for 10-minutes. If you really must coif your hair, follow Penny Weston’s advice: “A short blast to remove excess water, followed by towel or air drying, avoids adding unnecessary heat for everyone in the room.”
Although we can’t control the big stuff — like the fact the world is burning — we can control how we behave in the gym. Heatwaves test everyone's patience. But a little consideration goes a long way. So be cool: share the breeze, wipe the bench, keep the vest on. And for everyone’s sake, wear deodorant.
