A woman on TikTok says breaking up with her boyfriend triggered the biggest glow-up of her life. The reason? Commenters claim her cortisol levels dropped after cutting ties.
Elaine Kelsey (@ElaineKelsey) shared a video that’s now pulled in more than 2.1 million views, detailing her post-breakup transformation. In it, Kelsey appears visibly drained in the opening clip. Seconds later, she reveals her current look—clear skin, a sharper jawline, and a noticeably stronger physical presence. In the caption, she wrote simply, “Never again,” hinting at the toll the relationship took on her mental and physical health.
Commenters didn’t hold back when flaming her ex and discussing the ways breakups can cause big physical changes.
“They don’t just steal the light from our eyes. They steal our whole soul. Nothing like being reborn again,” wrote @Jessica Brady Zerfowski Bolt.
Another user, @Erika, added, “Nervous system regulating.”
One commenter, @D, said, “No more high cortisol levels.” But do relationships really add that much to cortisol levels? Can a breakup glow-up really happen naturally?
Are breakup glow-ups even real?
Breakup glow-ups are a real phenomenon, but it isn’t necessarily all “cortisol” levels. There are a variety of reasons why a person may “glow up” or even glow down after a breakup.
Cortisol, the body’s natural stress hormone, can decrease after a relationship ends. One study found that being in a passionate relationship deeply increased cortisol levels. Relationship instability can also cause stress increases and elevated cortisol. When a relationship ends, it can be reasonable to conclude that those levels decrease. Another study found that cortisol levels can finally lower to a more natural state, leaving a person less on edge.
Higher cortisol is correlated with metabolism, immune response, and other physical differences. It’s scientifically proven that stress reduction can help improve physical appearance. That’s because chronic stress can negatively impact skin and hair quality, giving a “lifeless” look to those who continually remain in hostile situations. If a breakup reduces stress, there’s a significant chance that a “glow up” can happen.
Breakups’ effect on physical appearance
Generally, self-esteem also increases after a breakup, especially if the person “glowing” is the dumper rather than the dumpee. Relationship dissolution can lead to positive self-reflection. Self-reflection can cause physical manifestations, like sitting up straight, wearing different outfits, or “signalling” in any number of ways, new emotional availability. Romantic relationships tend to influence self-conceptualization, so a person may be drawn to paying more attention to their appearance and demeanor once they exit a relationship.
People are also more likely to engage in self-improvement behaviors after experiencing a traumatic or stressful event. In one study, people diagnosed with Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) engaged in “Post-Traumatic Growth.” Post Traumatic Growth is defined as “the experience of positive change that occurs as a result of the struggle with highly challenging life crises.” While not every relationship can be defined as a “life challenging crisis,” losing a loved one–no matter how long the relationship was–can evoke emotional responses or feel “life-changing.”
It’s worth noting that Kelsey regularly exercises. In other videos posted to her page, viewers can see her consistent routine. Cortisol level decreases alone don’t necessarily account for a breakup, but actions can contribute heavily to it.
@elainekelsey Never again
♬ original sound – indi
The Mary Sue has reached out to Kelsey via TikTok direct message for comment.
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