And here’s day one’s match report:
I don’t think we’re going to be shown any interviews so I’ll sign off and leave you to follow Australia v Pakistan. Thanks so much for your emails and tweets, especially during the fallow period. I’m off to put on my bed socks (presumably that translates down under). Good morning/afternoon/night!
Play abandoned for the day! NZ 173-3 (Latham 101, Nicholl 5)
Well that’s it - the rain has killed off any prospects of play for the rest of the day in Hamilton. New Zealand head home the happier side, a fabulous century by Tom Latham and a stylish fifty by Ross Taylor. England got Williamson early, but dropped Latham and will have to deal with a Ben Stokes knee twinge that has so far restricted him to two overs.
Oh Phil, now that is an image that doesn’t translate so well across hemispheres:
@tjaldred For Australians following the sentence should be "Men in thongs wrestling umbrellas"......
— phil withall (@phil_withall) November 29, 2019
@tjaldred further point of order ... it’s jandal - and yes that’s the sky tower and it’s not raining in Auckland. pic.twitter.com/YjgL89pcKH
— Gez Johns (@Gez1802) November 29, 2019
Now you’re just showing off. I glanced out of my window and it is still pitch black. And will be for another three hours. Be gone November!
An email, from across the pond!
Greetings from not-so-sunny California where I have just had my first ever Thanksgiving dinner. England’s performance rather matching my indigestion, writes James Pinder.
Since the protocol seems to be to offer a provocative opinion, should England make an example of someone, Admiral Byng style, pour encourager les autres? I mostly think that would be a deeply silly idea but I can’t deny a certain urge to see something, anything, done. Perhaps that’s the awful truth, there are no quick fixes and we are doomed to be mediocre for the foreseeable.
Firstly, congratulations on the thanksgiving dinner James - I would love to experience one in my life. Trad turkey and trimmings? Any vegetarian options? As for an example - I guess Jack Leach has been dropped, but only (I think) because Stokes has a dodgy knee. Joe Root being stripped of the captaincy would be the grand gesture, but I’d have thought they’d give him South Africa and Sri Lanka to prove his mettle ( as long as he wants them.)
Over in Adelaide, Joe Burns has been prized out by CWC 2019 superstar Shaheen Afridi. Australia 8-1. Actual action over on the OBO with superstar Geoff Lemon. But do stick with me for gentle chit chat and footwear trivia.
Abramowitz has chastised us Robbie. He points out that Jandel is in fact spelt Jandal. Ah, which google tells me is a shortening of Japanese Sandal. What you learn doing OBO coverage.
But Robbie - it is not so satisfyingly 0nomatopoeic. Unless shoes go Jan-del in New Zealand?
It is still raining by the way.
Just seen some pictures from Hamilton - men in flip-flops wrestling umbrellas. It is chucking it down.
Did I sound desperate? Good.
With some annual festivities coming up at school, us students have got this Friday off writes Abhijato Sensarma. I wasn’t aware that England are playing, so I decided to finish off Rick and Morty’s third season this morning (genius show, by the way). Now I realise there are three matches to look forward to today, even if England’s day’s play is possibly over. Went through the OBO and have a question in mind - how long do you think Archer will be persisted with in the eleven if he hypothetically doesn’t perform as well as the other pacers in the team, especially once Anderson returns to the side?
I’d think Anderson will have to be wrapped in cotton wool on his return, and I doubt even he has many years left in the tank. I think Archer is gold-dust and they’ll persevere - they’ll just have to learn how to use him properly. He’s bowled well today, by all accounts.
In the Sky box, the commentators are lining up in various states of dishevelled-ness from shirt and tie, to Mike Atherton, (one button undone), to Ian Ward (two buttons undone and a chaise-longue just out of picture). Out of the window, the covers are still on and the rain falls. Mail me, go on. All-time great Kiwis, what you’re getting your dad for Christmas, mince pie recipes, should Parky/Lockie Ferguson have played. Anything.
Really interesting discussion on TMS at tea between New Zealand chief exec David White and Simon Mann that I half-caught. Was impressed by White’s realism and his lack of greed - NZ’s T20 competition he sees as mostly for domestic players, and he thinks the proliferation of T20 competitions around the world is unsustainable and only a few of them are likely to survive. Also talking about NZ holding Test matches at the smaller grounds like Hamilton and Mount Maunganui - says that it is the future, and that it is the way NZ cricket is, a few thousand people lolling on grassy banks, enjoying themselves. Sounds perfect.
And it is raining at Adelaide too.
New Zealand cricket chief executive David White is our guest at tea. #BBCCricket #NZvENG pic.twitter.com/ZRaDNq1A9U
— Test Match Special (@bbctms) November 29, 2019
Spectators scramble around for their picnic bags and head for the trees. This could be a bit of wait I’m afraid. But Brian Withington is ready for any weather.
I’m idly wondering if the film I watched between 12:30 and 4am yesterday morning has anything to offer in terms of England’s selectorial dilemmas. Capos coming and going, and the enduring presence of a deadly Irishman? Before leaping to any Eoinesque conclusions, I think instead that the digital de-aging technology might offer a solution. Time to recall a rejuvenated Graham Gooch, an opening batsman whose batting form actually improved with captaincy.
Over in Adelaide, Australia have won the toss and will bat first. It’s a day-nighter, pink ball n all.
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Rain
54.3 overs: NZ 173-3 (Latham 101, Nicholls 5) The clouds are gathering and the lights are on... ah, here come the groundsmen, pulling out what looks like a safety curtain over the pitch, one of them losing his sunglasses in the process. The umpires wander about with brollies. And we have a delay.
There are reports of thunder in Hamilton, but over in Adelaide, Pakistan and Australia are about to start the second Test. The OBO coverage is underway too, do check in.
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Tea
54th over: NZ 173-3 (Latham 101, Nicholls 5) Well played Tom Latham, who doesn’t fall for the Joe Root joker the over before tea. Careful, fluid, determined and, in the words of Mark Butcher in the Sky studio, “effortless. “ Just the one stroke of luck when Stokes put him down on 66. That’s tea, just off for a quick coffee break, see you in ten!
Tom Latham has reached a superb century in Hamilton. He has been very patient - defending with caution outside off stump & scoring heavily (71%) through the leg side when bowlers have erred too full & straight. He’s whipped clinicaly through mid-wicket. #NZvENG pic.twitter.com/KoSLGTDvP7
— The CricViz Analyst (@cricvizanalyst) November 29, 2019
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Tom Latham reaches 100!
156 balls, 15 fours - the last of them a beauty that he, with twinkle toes, hits back over Joe Root’s head. Helmet off, he smiles broadly and raises his bat. Lovely innings.
53rd over: NZ 168-3 (Latham 95, Nicholls 5) The merry-go-round turns and we’re back to Jofra Archer again. Nicholls is surprised by a short one, but ducks safely under.
“er, Ben Stokes is the son of an international rugby player” says Peter Roy. Oh yes, dear Peter, you’re right. In my mind his dad had never played internationally, but coached in the UK. Very bad me.
Wiki: Gerard “Ged” James Stokes (born 1955) is a New Zealand former rugby league footballer who played in the 1970s and 1980s .
52nd over: NZ 168-3 (Latham 95, Nicholls 5) The sun is out at Hamilton and though the clouds are high and fluffy and gathering there is no sign yet of the showers hovering around the radar. Latham cuts Woakes handsomely for four with a crack of the bat
51st over: NZ 164-3 (Latham 92, Nicholls 5) What a beautiful shot from Nicholls! Broad strays and he whips the bat and the ball flies through cover and across the field for four.
Great fact on Daryl Mitchell from Mike Atherton - he’s the first son of a former All Black to play Test cricket. Have any sons/daughters of international rugby players played cricket for England?
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50th over: NZ 160-3 (Latham 92, Nicholls 1) Latham tips the ball off his hips as Woakes drifts onto his leg stumps, and that’s a juicy boundary to ease him into the nineties.
James Fitzpatrick has sent a northern hemisphere email. Hi James!
Watching the slow demise of English test Cricket has my Sleep pattern in a happy muddle, as I toss and turn in another humid night in Dublin.I have to wonder if England have the right people at slip. People carrying an injury, or low in confidence might be better elsewhere what is your opinion?
Odd fact:Alec Stewart was born 08 04 1963 and his test run total is 8463....
Root has been pretty awesome hasn’t he? (or did he drop one too that I missed?) My money would be on Stokes to catch most of the time, but that’s a good point about his knee and whether he is less mobile that he usually is.
49th over: NZ 156-3 (Latham 88, Nicholls 1) Ah, Broad has replaced Stokes after just two overs - perhaps that was why England decided to go in with the five seamers. Though no Leach to do the donkey work of course. Who gets that burden? Root? Denly? A maiden for Broad.
48th over: NZ 156-3 (Latham 88, Nicholls 1) Those on the telly who’ve been watching since the start conclude that Woakes has been England’s best bowler today. That was a calamitous momentary loss of concentration by Taylor, who’s played so nicely. England now looking slightly less cross with the world.
Sam Spijkers-Shaw has spotted an OBO flaw: “It seems, much like England and their keepers, that you and Tim have got your wires crossed with the runs scored by Taylor/Latham.Just thought I’d point it out.Ta!”
Whoops, thanks Sam. Poor Taylor, falling just short of his century...
Updated
WICKET! Taylor c Root b Woakes 53
At last! The ball after reaching fifty, Taylor has a flash at Woakes and is well caught by Root at first slip - his third catch of the day.
47th over: NZ 146-2 (Latham 48, Taylor 84) Ah, Stokes does get another over, perhaps ignore my medical evidence, though he is still grimacing. Nevertheless, he digs in a few short ones, then a fuller one which Latham knocks for four.
46th over: NZ 144-2 (Latham 47, Taylor 83) Chris Woakes, who has a very handsome new beard, replaces Curran. Latham is respectful, until a couple of balls after the lbw review, when he drives through midwicket for four. Lovely shot.
REVIEW!
England review an LBW from Chris Woakes against Latham...umpire Dharmasena originally says not out, we watch the third ump deliberate.... it pitches outside leg, by a fraction.... and England lose a review.
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45th over: NZ 140-2 (Latham 47, Taylor 79) And so it came to pass that Ben Stokes was thrown the ball, dodgy knee not withstanding. Actually that knee does seem to be troubling him both in walk back and follow-through. Not sure he’s going to be bowling many overs here. Anyway, Latham plays a couple of lovely shots, one superbly stopped by a spreadeagled Archer just short of the boundary and the other a straight midwicket drive for four to bring up the hundred partnership in 183 deliveries.
44th over: NZ 133-2 (Latham 47, Taylor 72) In scurries, scampers, bustles Sam Curran. Ross Taylor leans into a front foot drives and sends the ball skimming across the green outfield. Zak Crawley chases it admirably but the ball bounces off his leg and over the boundary.
43rd over: NZ 128-2 (Latham 43, Taylor 71) Archer removes his hat and, one short sleeve, one long, continues his spell. Bowling to two slips and a gully, he slides in. He varies the length and Taylor (mostly) plays him carefully back. Outside in the darkness, the milkman drives past.
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42nd over: NZ 126-2 (Latham 42, Taylor 70) Good early morning, afternoon, eve, my fine feathered friends and thank you very much Tim. I switched the telly on to see Jofra Archer slowly shaking his head as he deliberately put his hat back on. A drop and a bit of dodgy umpiring to mull over in that first post-lunch hour. Curran bowls an uneventful over and here we are.
That’s me done. Thanks for your company, and here, cup of tea in hand, is the ever-sparkling Tanya Aldred.
41st over: NZ 124-2 (Latham 69, Taylor 41) Archer is fully fired up now. He touches 89.5mph with a delivery that whistles through Latham and ends up in the hands of Root. Where most of us would say “Ow!”, Root says “Owzat?” But the ump is unmoved. And that’s drinks, with New Zealand winning the last hour, although they’ve had some near-misses. David Lloyd, who’s not the narky type, still isn’t convinced that Taylor’s bat was anywhere near that ball from Broad.
Updated
40th over: NZ 123-2 (Latham 68, Taylor 41) England could do with a maiden, and Curran provides it.
39th over: NZ 123-2 (Latham 68, Taylor 41) That was much better from Archer, stung by that sudden flurry of runs.
“Evening Tim,” says Simon Richards. “Who should’ve been left out is a good question. The neighbour’s cat who wakes me up sneaking in to nick my cat’s food......or Jack Leach?”
Dropped! Latham by Stokes off Archer
Just when the runs are flowing, Archer finds some extra bounce, takes the edge – and Stokes, diving to his left at second slip, spills it. Shades of last week, when Stokes dropped BJ Watling and saw him add another 174.
38th over: NZ 117-2 (Latham 62, Taylor 41) Yet another change, and this one doesn’t go well either. Curran, bowling very full, is driven straight by Latham and square (twice) by Taylor, who has 16 off his last ten balls.
37th over: NZ 108-2 (Latham 59, Taylor 35) As Broad gives way to Archer, Taylor off-drives for two to bring up the hundred, and then cuts for four, twice. After conceding only 12 off eight overs in the morning, Archer goes for ten off this one. I wonder if he’s 100-per-cent fit.
36th over: NZ 98-2 (Latham 59, Taylor 25) Latham cover-drives Woakes for four. Since 15 December last year, Latham’s Test average is over 100, with four hundreds, the lowest of which is 154. Be afraid, if you’re English.
35th over: NZ 94-2 (Latham 55, Taylor 25) Broad had just strayed onto each batsman’s legs, giving away easy singles, but the non-LBW was a fine response.
Not out!
The TV umpire detects a faint edge, so Taylor survives. It was lovely bowling from Broad, full and straight, and Taylor (who’d played right across it) didn’t review right away. The edge was so faint that he didn’t notice it himself.
Updated
Wicket? Taylor given LBW b Broad 25
Broad is certain he’s got Taylor, the umpire agrees, but there’s a review.
34th over: NZ 92-2 (Latham 54, Taylor 24) Woakes slips in a yorker outside off and Taylor is tempted, but he hits the ground rather than the ball. That’s six overs since lunch, for six runs.
33rd over: NZ 91-2 (Latham 54, Taylor 23) Broad is getting the Kookaburra to do just enough to make the batsmen think. He brings one back into the left-handed Latham and only stifles his appeal because of a big inside edge.
32nd over: NZ 91-2 (Latham 54, Taylor 23) Five dots from Woakes to Latham, followed by – it’s not easy to contain my excitement, but I’ll try – a single.
31st over: NZ 90-2 (Latham 53, Taylor 23) For Taylor, Broad wants a short leg, so the cordon is now down to two men, which suggests Root is spooked by the possibility of another huge NZ score. Taylor takes a quick single to bring up the fifty partnership off 16.2 overs. Broad beats Latham with a jaffa.
30th over: NZ 88-2 (Latham 52, Taylor 22) Woakes continues, and so does Latham, pushing stoutly into the covers for a single. Taylor, overbalancing a touch, manages to glance, also for a single. If you’re feeling at all sleepy, the game isn’t going to stand in your way.
29th over: NZ 86-2 (Latham 51, Taylor 21) The close field is down to two slips and a gully, which feels too defensive. Broad gets the maiden he was looking for, but Taylor is untroubled.
It’s not raining yet. And Stuart Broad is coming back on.
“Can I just check with you,” says Pete. “England have selected five seamers, have won the toss and bowled, and are now using a part-time spinner before lunch on Day One. Is that right?” It is. Whether it’s wise is another matter.
John Starbuck is back for more. “Assuming Foakes is going to play as principal wicketkeeper in South Africa, that means Buttler plays as captain and batsman only. What is it with keepers relinquishing their roles? Maybe Root could become a keeper too?” Ha. I don’t think we’re assuming that Foakes is going straight back to No.1, are we? My guess is that if Buttler became captain, Bairstow would keep wicket. Which might mean that Foakes wouldn’t make the tour, good as his Test record is. It’s all the very definition of an embarrassment of riches.
“England have found 0.46° of swing in the morning session,” reports CricViz. “That is the lowest average swing they have found in the opening 28 overs of any innings since the first innings of the third Test in Sri Lanka last year when they found 0.42°.” Do you ever find, following cricket, that you don’t know whether to clap or groan?
28th over: NZ 86-2 (Latham 51, Taylor 21) That delivery from Woakes was hitting the top of middle-and-leg, but two-thirds of the ball landed outside the line. Latham celebrates, very discreetly, with a nudge for two, to reach a solid fifty off 87 balls. And that’s lunch, with NZ perhaps marginally the happier of the teams, given that they were put in. England have been decent but not as threatening as you should be when you pick five seamers. See you in half an hour for what could be a rainy afternoon.
Updated
Not out!
It pitched outside leg.
Wicket? Latham given LBW b Woakes 49
First ball back, Woakes raps Latham’s pad, but the decision from umpire Dharmasena takes a while and the review is instant...
27th over: NZ 84-2 (Latham 49, Taylor 21) Root, who has been busier than in the first Test, decides it’s time for some spin, so he has to turn to himself. He drags one down and feeds Taylor’s favourite shot, the cut.
26th over: NZ 78-2 (Latham 48, Taylor 16) Archer is cranking up the hostility, striking Taylor on the thigh pad and then making him jump with a sharp bouncer. Good contest.
“From Balmy Dublin,” says James Fitzpatrick, “I spy a certain unease in the England camp. Is it possible Root could be given the door if they lose by another innings?” It is. “Who’s your favourite if not Buttler?” In the present squad, it is Buttler; outside it, Eoin Morgan.
25th over: NZ 77-2 (Latham 48, Taylor 15) Curran isn’t finding much swing, and what there is, David Lloyd reckons, is from the hand. When he drops a touch short, Latham pulls him rather too easily; when he goes full on the pads, it’s a gift of a leg-glance.
24th over: NZ 69-2 (Latham 40, Taylor 15) Archer, who clearly keeps an eye on the OBO, touches 88mph. Taylor keeps him out, and Archer has 7-1-11-0.
23rd over: NZ 69-2 (Latham 40, Taylor 15) Sam Curran swaps with Broad again and Latham punches him into the covers for two. Curran could do with a wicket, if only to get his bowling average (30 and a bit) back below his batting average (30 plumb).
22nd over: NZ 67-2 (Latham 38, Taylor 15) Another bouncer from Archer to Taylor, and a better one, which draws a flail-and-miss. Archer has made it to 86mph. Let’s have a bit of 90 before lunch.
21st over: NZ 66-2 (Latham 37, Taylor 15) A few singles off Broad, who has figures of 8-2-25-1.
Updated
20th over: NZ 63-2 (Latham 35, Taylor 14) Back comes Archer, armed with... a right old loosener, which Taylor punches through mid-on for four. Three balls later, Archer – up to 84mph now – jags one back in and nicks the inside edge. When he tries a bouncer, it goes so high that Ollie Pope, who is not the tallest, has no chance of stopping it.
19th over: NZ 55-2 (Latham 35, Taylor 10) Latham punches Broad through midwicket for two. His leaves have been sketchy, but his strokeplay has been crisp.
18th over: NZ 52-2 (Latham 33, Taylor 9) Just a single off Woakes, who has 1-14, four of them overthrows, from five overs.
In all this chat about the England selection, we’ve been neglecting the New Zealand one. “Really disappointed that NZ went with Henry over Ferguson,” says Andrew Miller. “Seems an extremely conservative approach, same goes for Mitchell. Feels like they’ve picked a team to not lose, which after winning by an innings is negative in the extreme.”
17th over: NZ 51-2 (Latham 33, Taylor 8) Broad returns in place of Curran and Ross Taylor plays the first cut of the day, for four, followed by a straight push for two and a quick single to midwicket. NZ’s fifty comes up off 16.5 overs, showing that this surface has runs in it as well as wickets.
“So,” asks John Starbuck, “having established that Foakes should be in [12th over], who else would you choose for South Africa?” That is a big question. Can I get back to you when the game goes to sleep?
16th over: NZ 43-2 (Latham 32, Taylor 1) Woakes comes this close to another wicket as Latham leaves one that’s too close for comfort to his off bail. Meanwhile those beady eyes at CricViz have spotted that Woakes bowled Williamson five inswingers before the one that went away and kissed the edge. Richard Hadlee would approve.
15th over: NZ 41-2 (Latham 32, Taylor 0) A better line from Curran, keeping Latham honest, until the last ball, which is clipped for two.
“What are the rules on Father of the House?” asks Andrew Goudie. “I’ve been at my work for 28 years (without a sniff of promotion in all that time, by the way). My only colleague with longer service has been here for 30 years, but with a break of 3 years when he thought his then-wife was loaded. Am I father of the house, or is it him?” That’s not an email – it’s a novel.
14th over: NZ 39-2 (Latham 30, Taylor 0) And that’s drinks, with England suddenly on top. It was a really good catch from Root, with the ball almost past him.
Updated
Wicket!! Williamson c Root b Woakes 4 (NZ 39-2)
That’s the big one! Woakes turns Williamson round by landing one on off and straightening it, and Root takes another catch, low to his right at first slip. Is Root the fielder rescuing Root the captain?
Updated
13th over: New Zealand 39-1 (Latham 30, Williamson 4) Curran, after being spot-on to the right-hander, strays onto the pads of the left-handed Latham and goes for consecutive fours.
Here’s Gary Naylor, with a harrumph. “I’m genuinely perplexed as to why Jos Buttler thought that the best way to recover from 200+ overs wicketkeeping between back-to-back Tests, was a trip to the gym. If it’s heavy lifting etc, surely there’s a risk and if it’s light work, why bother?” This seems a bit damned-if-he-does, damned-if-he-doesn’t. Sportsmen have to keep fit, and Buttler’s attendance record is very good. Everybody gets a training injury now and again, don’t they?
Updated
12th over: New Zealand 29-1 (Latham 21, Williamson 3) Latham block-drives Woakes for four through mid-off, then picks up five as the debutant Zak Crawley shies at the stumps, misses by some way, and gives away four overthrows. Shy is the word: he looks thoroughly embarrassed, poor guy.
“Lovely to be here (at least for a couple of hours anyway),” says David Horn. “So, not long ago, Johnny Bairstow was wicketkeeper, but then Jos Buttler took over. Now, with one injury, we have someone keeping wicket for the 6th time in their first class career, while Ben Foakes sits at home – a better keeper than all of them and probably a better bat than the new number seven. It’s the kind of shambles you might expect at 4-0 down in a home Ashes series, not one Test into a tour. Five seamers and no spinner too! It’s a chaotic shambles. Grrr.”
Updated
11th over: New Zealand 20-1 (Latham 12, Williamson 3) Here is Sam Curran, who may feel, after the first Test, that Williamson is his bunny. He concentrates on fourth or fifth stump and starts with a maiden.
“Evening Tim.” Evening, Kim Thonger. “Shall I be called pessimistic if I forecast a NZ 1st innings total in excess of 600?” You shall. “I just get the feeling now that we’re in the end days of the Root era and putting them in to bat may be the final nail in his coffin, hammered home himself.” Harsh but memorable. “And leaving Leach out just seems utterly barmy.”
10th over: New Zealand 20-1 (Latham 12, Williamson 3) Joe Root takes Jofra Archer off, as if determined to err on the side of under-bowling him for once. Rather than Sam Curran, the third seamer is Chris Woakes, who has endangered his image as the perfect son-in-law by GROWING A BEARD. His hair remains tidy, as does his bowling, but Kane Williamson gets off the mark with a characteristic back-foot drive for three.
An answer of sorts for Dean Kinsella (2nd over). “The overseas TMS link doesn’t seem to work in Australia,” says Allan Hobbs, “and all those radio apps that promise so much always fail to deliver. However, for my fellow English types I’m delighted to reveal that radio.org.nz/sport has the good stuff.”
9th over: New Zealand 17-1 (Latham 12, Williamson 0) Broad, scenting blood, beats Latham with a ball that’s considerably better than the one that did for Raval. The wicket, one of the commentators points out, was Broad’s first of the series.
Updated
8th over: New Zealand 17-1 (Latham 12, Williamson 1) Another row of five dots as Archer keeps Latham quiet, before a quick single off the last ball, which will keep Kane Williamson off strike for a bit longer.
“Dear Fellow-Tim,” begins Tim Sanders. “He’s not even the best wicketkeeper at Surrey. [Pope, that is.] Someone has to say it – For Foakes’ Sake! I suppose it’s a sign that the selectors and management see this as a bit of a friendly warm-up type jaunt to New Zealand, that they didn’t bring a second wicketkeeper who is first-choice for their county, and left out the player who is actual first choice at Ollie Pope’s actual county. I’ve read Jonny Bairstow’s book, in which he describes how it was standing in for Matt Prior seven years ago, having not even completed a full season keeping wicket for Yorkshire and not having played a first-class game for some months. So Pope, however talented he is, has been left horribly exposed.
“Whilst I’m on – five seamers?! Surely if it’s that seamer-friendly, we won’t need five of them? Anyone would think there was some sort of important selection decisions being made in the UK and I’m trying to avoid them by talking about cricket.”
Updated
7th over: New Zealand 16-1 (Latham 11) That was crafty from Broad, who kept Raval pinned down with five dots, then floated up the full one.
Wicket! Raval c Root b Broad 5 (NZ 16-1)
There we are. Broad moves one away, Raval doesn’t have to play it but he fancies the length, and Root takes a comfortable catch at first slip.
Updated
6th over: New Zealand 16-0 (Raval 5, Latham 11) Archer is in the mood. Off his 16th ball, he finally concedes a four, but only because Latham thick-edges and Root hasn’t got a third man.
5th over: New Zealand 12-0 (Raval 5, Latham 7) A couple of singles off Broad, who also brings one back into Raval that whispers in the ear of the off stump as it goes by.
“That,” says Andrew Goudie, “was possibly the ropiest rendition of ‘Jerusalem’ that I’ve ever heard.”
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4th over: New Zealand 10-0 (Raval 4, Latham 6) Archer, bowling quicker now, keeps Latham tied down, and draws a leading edge. There’s a word itching to come out of my keyboard, and the word is “Wicket!”.
“Talking of ‘Father of the House’ Scyld Berry,” says Ian Forth, “I’ve just binge-watched The Crown in which the Father of the House for many years, Ted Heath, emerges rather poorly. Disappointingly cricket failed to emerge as a theme, again. Surely the Duke of Edinburgh hauling Tony Greig over the coals for disloyalty to the Empire would have made a highly dramatic episode. Or at the very least, a poster of David Steele executing a forward lunge on Princess Anne’s bedroom wall.” Even by royal standards, that might have been a bit eccentric.
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3rd over: New Zealand 10-0 (Raval 4, Latham 6) Raval clumps Broad for a couple through the covers. Ian Smith, the commentator who became a legend one day in July, feels the pitch is only superficially green, and will turn out quite dry. If he’s right, five seamers may well add up to a howler.
“Do we know,” asks Beth, “why England are wearing black armbands today?” In memory of Chris Silverwood’s father-in-law.
2nd over: New Zealand 8-0 (Raval 2, Latham 6) Jofra Archer, necklace catching the sunshine, finds his line right away and concedes only a single as Raval plays another nurdle.
“Hiya,” says Dean Kinsella. “Any chance of the TMS link please Tim.” Going to have to crowd-source that one...
Updated
“Looking at this line-up,” says Kevin Wilson, “you almost want NZ to win by an innings and 60 again.”
1st over: New Zealand 7-0 (Raval 1, Latham 6) Raval tucks Broad off his hip for a single to get the scoreboard moving. As Jerusalem rings out, it’s clear that the pitch is green and unpleasant for the batsmen. Latham edges his first ball through the vacant fourth slip, clips the next one nicely for four, then inside-edges onto the pad. Fifth ball, Ollie Pope finally gets something to do and he pulls off a fine diving take as Broad swings one back in.
Updated
The players are out there. England look a bit like Man United did earlier, with Stuart Broad taking the role of Lee Grant and Joe Root as Jesse Lingard. What can possibly go wrong?
“One of my issues with Root’s captaincy,” says Tom van der Gucht, “is that he seems to never move on from certain players despite them being left out. It can’t be good for the team he has with him in NZ when they keep reading interviews where he’s banging on about how Moeen Ali and Bairstow still have a big future in the team. He should be bigging up the newbies so they go in filled with confidence rather than worrying that they’re only a temporary filler until he brings his mates back.” Fair point, but it may not be his decision.
An email! “Seriously,” says Alex Gaywood, “if the England players don’t spend this entire test constantly reminding Daryl Mitchell that he’s not even the best cricketer called Daryl Mitchell then there’s something very wrong in the world of cricketing sledging. With there also being an Aussie cricketer using the name Ryan Sidebottom, is this part of a grand plot from the southern hemisphereans to steal the names of our cult county cricketers for their own devious use?”
More senior press-box wisdom, this time from Simon Wilde of The Sunday Times. “England’s leading Test run-scorers since May 1, 2018,” he notes, are “Jos Buttler [with] 1,228 runs, Joe Root 1,213 runs, Ben Stokes 1,180. Only person to average more than 40 in that time is Ben Foakes (41.5). Anyone know what happened to him?”
When you want to know what’s going off out there, the person to turn to is Scyld Berry of the Telegraph, who is the father of the house among English cricket writers. “Lovely morning to bowl first after England won toss,” he observes on Twitter. “A damp pitch, some cloud, humid and five seamers, no Jack Leach. Hard job for Ollie Pope to keep to Jofra Archer ... Or will England freeze, as their seamers have before in these circumstances?”
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Teams: two changes each
NZ 1 Jeet Raval, 2 Tom Latham, 3 Kane Willaimson (capt), 4 Ross Taylor, 5 Henry Nicholls, 6 BJ Watling (wkt), 7 Daryl Mitchell, 8 Mitchell Santner, 9 Tim Southee, 10 Matt Henry, 11 Neil Wagner.
England 1 Rory Burns, 2 Dominic Sibley, 3 Joe Denly, 4 Joe Root (capt), 5 Ben Stokes, 6 Ollie Pope (wkt), 7 Zak Crawley, 8 Sam Curran, 9 Chris Woakes, 10 Jofra Archer, 11 Stuart Broad.
NZ would have bowled
Kane Williamson, candid as ever, says he would have liked to bowl first too. In his XI, Daryl Mitchell replaces Colin de Grandhomme as the allrounder and Matt Henry will take the new ball instead of Trent Boult. I wonder how soon that will be.
Toss: England win it and bowl
Joe Root calls right again and this time he fancies a bowl. He’s playing FIVE seamers, with Jack Leach replaced by Chris Woakes.
Early team news: no Buttler
Jos Buttler is ruled out after tweaking his back in the gym, where he is England’s most zealous exerciser, equal with Ben Stokes. Ollie Pope takes the gloves, which might, paradoxically, help him settle with the bat; he becomes England’s fourth Test wicketkeeper this year. Buttler’s place goes to the only spare batsman, Zak Crawley, who has been presented with his England cap by his Kent team-mate, Joe Denly. Crawley is expected to bat at No.7. It’s all a bit of a mess.
Preamble: crunch time for Root
Evening everyone, or should that be morning? Wherever you are in your day, the England captain may be on borrowed time. Joe Root has just had his worst week since the Ashes horror show of 2017-18. It’s hard to say what was more inert in the first Test at Mount Maunganui, his leadership or his batting. And now he’s lost the support of the person in the press box who has walked the most miles in his shoes. “England,” wrote Mike Atherton in Wednesday’s Times, “need Root’s runs far more than his captaincy.” Atherton’s words, which tend to be carefully chosen, carry weight with cricket administrators, and that “far” was pretty damning.
In a further sign of a turning tide, both The Times and Cricinfo have published guides to who might succeed Root (consensus: probably Jos Buttler, with the odd wistful glance at Eoin Morgan, who could probably have the job if he wanted it, as a specialist captain in the Brearley tradition). One of Root’s many bosses, Ashley Giles, may already be regretting saying that England “plan for him to be our captain” in the next Ashes, when it’s still two years away. It was unlike Giles to break one of the golden rules of sport: take each game as it comes.
The good news for Root is that this second and final Test hands him an instant chance to turn things around, and New Zealand are missing his personal tormentor, Colin de Grandhomme, as well as Trent Boult. A drawn series would be one better than last time, and this England often react to a shocker by suddenly shaping up. The bad news is that the match is at Hamilton, which has become a fortress for New Zealand. They have five wins and a draw in the past six Tests there, never mind the confidence that flows from a crushing victory.
England haven’t won a Test in Australasia since Andrew Strauss was captain, nine years ago. That’s 16 Tests’ worth of nocturnal pain for their supporters. Are they in for more of the same? We will begin to find out at 11am local time, which is 10pm in the UK. I’ll be back 25 minutes before that with the toss and the teams. If you need something to read in the meantime, I recommend this, picked up by The Guardian: Wisden Cricket Monthly’s feature on the state of the art of commentary.
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