“I’m back!” So declared senator Pauline Hanson as she stepped out of a white commonwealth car to attend “Senate school” in Canberra on Tuesday.
It’s called Senate school because the 14 elected representatives are here to learn about the procedures of parliament and the Senate.
But at times it felt more like a Senate safari with media along for the ride to catch a sighting of the rare birds and beasts who won their places at the top of this representative democracy’s food chain.
Hanson, of course, is the former member for Oxley and is returning to parliament after 18 years, this time in the red chamber.
In her years in the wilderness Hanson was never shy about giving an interview. But now she and her One Nation teammates Rod Culleton, Malcolm Roberts and Brian Burston have stepped right into the centre of the Australian political safari.
Lessons were jargon-filled (try guessing what “exclusive cognisance” is) but were boiled down into some bite-size pieces, such as the so-called Spider-Man principle – with great power comes great responsibility.
It’s useful stuff. Best to know the ins and outs of procedure to avoid getting chucked out of a particularly willing question time, or at least to know what the ejection is for.
In the morning Hanson was the focus of attention for a media scrum eager to get a picture of the senators posed in a parliamentary courtyard.
Asked whether she had figured out Victorian senator Derryn Hinch yet, she quipped: “I never will.”
Hanson was then drawn into an impromptu media conference, with one TV journalist egging her on to criticism of Hinch for not giving her family law proposals due consideration.
Cameras flashed and boom mikes lowered towards her flame-red hair.
After the senators studied all day, the media were invited into a committee room to snap them in their natural habitat. A few shots were taken of the whole group and then came a stampede to the end of the table for Hanson.
Senators were invited to graze on afternoon tea while the media were led outside the gate of the parliamentarians’ enclosure.
Labor senators Pat Dodson and Malarndirri McCarthy came out to address the media. A few others including Louise Pratt and Liberal James Paterson made appearances.
Photographers stalked around the committee room’s door like hunters. But the bright plumage of Hanson was not seen again.
Hanson is not the only political animal in the crowded crossbench zoo. It now boasts 11 senators: four One Nation, three Nick Xenophon Team, David Leyonhjelm, Bob Day, Hinch and Jacqui Lambie.
Hinch became the oldest person to be elected to either house of parliament, aged 72.
The Nick Xenophon Team’s Stirling Griff and Skye Kakoschke-Moore attended the sessions. They’ll need to swat up to catch up with their party founder who has already been in the Senate for eight years.
At the end of the day it seemed the new senators had only had a taste of the lessons of parliamentary democracy and the media never really had an opportunity to sink their teeth into their policy positions or understanding of the Spider-Man principle.
Parliament resumes on 30 August and then we’ll really see who’s who in the zoo.
