Nani

'Nani is happy to let the world know he is finally proving his potential this season,' chuckles Matt Hughes Photograph: guardian.co.uk

Here's Natasha Powell: 'NANI!!' screamed David Gill. 'This lad's a shirt printing gold mine and the best we can come up with is Nani!?!!' Photograph: guardian.co.uk

'Nani soon realised that it was in fact his poodle-curl hair cut, rather than Sir Alex's management skills, that had ruined his career,' barks Matt Kingscote Photograph: guardian.co.uk

'With his main striker injured, Sir Alex tried to add a little bit of Wayne's spirit to the other United players,' says Alex Keys Photograph: guardian.co.uk

'Super Nani's opponents were terrified of his naughty stepover,' cackles Rob Deacon Photograph: guardian.co.uk

Mary Poppins has come across some hard times in David Castle's world as Nani takes on Arshavin Photograph: guardian.co.uk

After United's defeat to Chelsea, Sir Alex told Nani to beat it. Laurie Whitwell, we thank you Photograph: guardian.co.uk

Phil Brown reckons Nani's follow up to Off The Ball was even better than its predecessor Photograph: guardian.co.uk

Will Wilson doesn't leave a caption, meaning as per last week's warning, he has been placed into administration Photograph: guardian.co.uk

'Nani sails through the air with the greatest of ease,' says the ever reliable Brian Corcoran Photograph: guardian.co.uk

Colin Hammond even wrote us a Thriller-inspired rhyme: It's close to half-time and something evil's lurking on the bench
Under Old Trafford sky, you see a sight that almost stops your title
You try to Macheda but Mike Dean blows up before you make it
You start to freeze as horror looks you right between the eyes
You're paralysed
'Cause this is Drogba, Drogba night Photograph: guardian.co.uk

'Scientists at the Large Hadron Collider discover the elusive Super Nani particle,' sciences Al Balmer Photograph: guardian.co.uk

'Another superb twist and turn from outside the box,' titters Bob Basi, as he rounds this week's efforts off Photograph: guardian.co.uk