I am 68 and my wife wishes to separate. I am devastated as I still love her. My feelings are exacerbated by the fear that when I am living alone I will suffer from a stroke, serious accident, rapid dementia, or something similarly horrendous and no one will know. I am not worried about a quick death, but I am haunted by the vision of a protracted death on my own. Given the population is ageing, I would not imagine I am unique in my concerns. I would welcome advice on how to minimise them.
• When leaving a message on this page, please be sensitive to the fact that you are responding to a real person in the grip of a real-life dilemma, who wrote to Private Lives asking for help, and may well view your comments here. Please consider especially how your words or the tone of your message could be perceived by someone in this situation, and be aware that comments that appear to be disruptive or disrespectful to the individual concerned will be removed.
• If you would like fellow readers to respond to a dilemma of yours, send us an outline of the situation of about 150 words. For advice from Pamela Stephenson Connolly on sexual matters, send us a brief description of your concerns.
• All correspondence should reach us by Wednesday morning. Email:private.lives@theguardian.com (please don’t send attachments).
