Every parent knows what a struggle the school run can be in the mornings. But one mum has been left at her wit's end after her ten-year-old daughter's attitude keeps delaying the whole family - and risks making her younger sibling late too. Having tried all manner of solutions, including early wake-up times, the mother has been left unsure what her next step should be.
But she knows she needs to find a solution - as her daughter has only made it into school at the correct time once all year. Worried the primary school will blame her for her daughter's tardiness, the mum then turned to a parenting forum in need of advice.
Posting to Netmums, she explained: "My 10 y/o is supposed to be in school for 8.30 but doesn't go down as late if she is there before 8.50. I also have a younger child who needs to be there before 8.50.
"10 y/o just takes her own time getting ready and doesn't seem to care whether she is late or not. We have only managed to get there for 8.30 once so far this year!
"I have tried getting her up earlier but I don't think the amount of time is the issue, it's how she spends it. She gets up at 7.30, has her breakfast and goes up to get ready at 7.55... we should set off at 8.25 but she is rarely ready. When I shout up to hurry her along she just shouts 'be patient!' And she said she doesn't care if she's late... And gets very angry."
"My tools are limited. She's already got a ban from her tablet for being rude. She doesn't own a phone, there isn't much punishment I can inflict for being late and she genuinely doesn't seem to care about schools reaction to her being late (I kind of feel like at primary it will look worse for me as the parent than the child as I am ultimately responsible for getting her there!!)"
Her post concluded: "Anyway if anyone has any tips on how to motivate time management to a stubborn, angry pre teen who is testing her boundaries ..do please let me know." Fortunately, parents were quick to offer suggestions.
One person wrote: "Wake her up 15 minutes earlier every day until she gets the message." And a second said: "If you tried everything, I would say ask the school for her to make up the time at lunch and break or after school." Meanwhile, another commenter was worried there might be a deeper reason behind the child's reluctance to get ready for school.
"My only taught (sic) is if she's been bullied at school, she wouldn't want to go in. This was my issue at the age of 16-17," revealed a parent, who went on to advise open communication - which proved to be a common thread in most responses.
Advocating for such an approach, a different responder said: "I would opt for giving her responsibility but helping her with that.
"I'd sit her down when you are both calm and talk about the situation. I’d explain that there are many times in life when she will need to be on time - for work, or exams, or important events etc. Explain that it’s a good skill to have and practice so you’re going to work on it."
They added: "Try and be positive and say that you believe she is capable and that she can learn these skills. Find something that will motivate her that is realistic that she can earn once tasks are completed."
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