Query: My 15 year old son has a very thick group of friends but I have seen how they all bully him all the time and strangely he is ok with it. Whenever I have tried confronting him why he takes their bullshit, he tells me they are his friends and he will manage. I don’t want my boy to be a weak man! He should know how to stand up for himself! Please help.
Response by Dr Preeti Parakh: Well, your son is standing up for himself when he tells you not to meddle. Most kids are teased by their friends at some point, and are not hurt by it. But when teasing becomes malicious and constant, it becomes bullying. Children who are being bullied usually try to avoid the situations that bring them in contact with the bullies. Sometimes there also are behavioural changes like appearing anxious or upset. Your son seems to be making no efforts to avoid this particular group of friends. If being with these friends does not upset him, I do not think he feels bullied. Rather than being weak, he appears to be quite strong and confident. I am sure he will be able to stand up to his friends if needed, just like he has stood up to you.
Dr Preeti Parakh, MD Psychiatry, Psychiatrist & Head, Mpower The Centre, Kolkata
