Prime minister’s questions is horrible. No question. It’s the part of the job every party leader hates. It’s noisy; people heckle and bray. But PMQs is also a key part of the job description for leader of the opposition, giving the chance once a week to show backbenchers, the media, party members and the public that you can hold the prime minister to account, take apart the government’s key policies that you disagree with and make his or her life as difficult as possible.
Do that well, and your backbenchers leave with a spring in their step, and the media give you a decent showing. That’s why it matters.
Last week, a behind-the-scenes documentary by the Vice News website gave us a rare insight into how Jeremy Corbyn and his team prepare for PMQs – and as someone who helped prepare Ed Miliband and Harriet Harman for their appearances at the dispatch box, I was somewhat alarmed.
PMQs gets a bad press, but no other democracy in the world has a form of parliamentary accountability that is so passionate, mischievous and lacking in deference to the man in charge. A sanitised replacement would make our democracy duller and, crucially, less accountable.
PMQs also gives people a pretty good barometer of how well a leader is doing, and how certain issues are playing out. After Ed was elected leader in 2010, the Tories used PMQs strategically to test their attacks on Labour and their own key messages, particularly on the economy – which ended up being the ones they used to devastating effect in the 2015 general election.
Jeremy has been trying to change the terms of trade at PMQs by adopting a less aggressive style, but there’s growing concern that it’s just not working, and that David Cameron’s unpopular government is getting an easy ride week in, week out.
As the Vice film showed, even many who voted for Jeremy were dismayed by his failure to damage Cameron in the week after the budget and the resignation of Iain Duncan Smith. The Labour leader needs to up his game.
One clip featured preparations for a duel in the chamber with Cameron. It seemed his entire office was present, and applauded everything Jeremy said. He needs a much tighter team who are not just yes men: people who will put him through his paces to get him psychologically ready. And he also needs to get some women and minorities – who might have a different view of the world – in the room. Political groupthink is dangerous. The Vice snapshot wasn’t exactly a fiesta of diversity.
My former colleague Tom Hamilton and I would play Cameron against Ed, and we didn’t hold back, even though it was uncomfortable at times. But Jeremy will never improve if all he gets is an ego massage.
PMQs is a serious, brutal business. The most important thing he needs to do is prepare for the Cameron attacks, and have some response up his sleeve. Cameron is very quick on his feet, though often predictable. He will always reach for the easiest thing to embarrass his opponent with – either a tricky quote from a Labour figure or something we did or didn’t do while in government. Spontaneity in the chamber is, more often than not, well prepared.
When I worked for Ed there was an occasion when Cameron was crowing about all the new doctors there were. We anticipated it and Ed came back with something along the lines of “They took seven years to train, so he’s welcoming a Labour achievement.” Cue cheers.
Another time, there was a story in the news about Ed at university and we knew Cameron was going to have a dig over student politics. Ed was ready with a line: “I may have done that at uni, but I’d rather that than throwing bread rolls at waiters and wrecking restaurants” – that got a cheer from Labour MPs, who loved any reference to Cameron’s Bullingdon Club days.
And despite the tensions between the PLP and the leader’s office, Labour MPs do want to see Jeremy give Cameron a good dressing-down. They respond to red meat and to someone who makes an effort even in challenging circumstances. I remember preparing Harriet Harman for her first PMQs – the first time a woman had done it in a long time. She was up against William Hague, famed for his wit, and everyone was already pretty nervous. Harriet was then photographed in her constituency wearing a stab vest, 48 hours before PMQs.
Everyone thought it was game over. Harriet and I knew Hague would come at her with some crack about the stab vest and so came up with a retort about not taking fashion advice from the man in the baseball cap. OK, it wasn’t the funniest line in the history of time, but it showed guts, got the Labour team cheering to the rafters and gave them a lift because she had taken the fight to the Tories. And that is what PMQs is about.
So even though Cameron is a good and tough opponent, Jeremy should try and get into the joust more. It’s not enough to do a supply teacher death stare over his glasses.
PMQs still happens every Wednesday at noon, and there’s no escaping it. Jeremy must try harder for the party and dedicate some real time and effort to his preparation – the results would be worth it.
