Relationships are about compromise and mutual support but what can be done when two important life events clash with each other?
A disgruntled husband has called on internet users for advice after arguing with his wife about her priorities and the dilemma is dividing opinions.
The 36-year-old man is preparing for surgery at the end of May to treat a respiratory condition.
He says his wife has been supportive throughout his health issues but the couple are now at odds as his wife’s best friend’s wedding has been moved from its original date in November to the same weekend as the surgery in May.
The wedding date change was at the last minute and the location is eight hours away from the groom’s hometown.
Sharing the argument on Reddit to ask if he was in the wrong for his anger, the man told said that he discussed the issue with his wife and told her that he needed her to be there for the surgery.
The wife asked if her husband could get someone else to come along as support instead as she wanted to see her best friend get married.
He said: "I just didn't think this was right. I was even puzzled that she asked me to get a substitute while she goes to her friend's wedding.
"I asked if her friend's wedding was more important than my health."
The argument continued as his wife complained that he was forcing her to choose between her husband and her best friend.
The worried husband said: “I told her she was being unreasonable and I never expected her to prioritise a wedding over my health.
“She loudly yelled ‘what do you want me to do?, I might lose my friend over this’ and then stopped talking to me.”
Asking for advice, he ended with: “I think she's the one who doesn't understand the difference since my surgery is an emergency and if her best friend is a good friend then she'd understand, right?
“Am I wrong for what I said?”
The post received thousands of comments, with social media users left polarised by the debate.
One user said: “It’s an emergency surgery, your life depends on it. If your wife would rather be at a friend’s wedding after that friend changed the date last minute, I’m sorry.
“Even if she’s been supportive in the past, I cannot imagine being that heartless towards my spouse.”
Another added, I can’t imagine telling my partner I’d rather be at any sort of event than be there for them during a scary surgery.”
In defence of his wife, one user said: “If the wife thinks she’s done enough and needs a break, don’t manipulate her into staying, let her go and recharge so she can care for him when he’s released from hospital.”
Another argued: “You can't stop being a good spouse just because you're sick. If this was some sort of one-off emergency that'd be one thing, but it's part of an ongoing condition that's already taken up tons of the wife's time, emotional energy, social life, friendship, and happiness.
“He needs to be the one who does something good for her, for a change.”
Whose side are you on? Let us know in the comments.
