When you have children, no matter how old they are, you'll want to make their lives easier and help them out as and when you can. You'd never want your children to suffer, especially when you can do something about it - but what would you do if your own flesh and blood started to take advantage of you?
That's the dilemma one mum faced as she outlined that she felt "taken for granted" after all she'd done for her daughter and her son-in-law.
She explained how her 30-year-old daughter and her daughter's husband wanted to move back home and live "rent-free" with her and her husband so they could buy their own home.
The mum explained: "My son-in-law has a house they had been living in, which he was able to rent out when they moved in with us - this gave them their living expenses whilst they set up a new business together."
But she took to a parenting forum to state how much she'd done for her daughter and her son-in-law during that time by "providing plenty of family meals, giving them loads of furniture and household items" and even providing financial support.
The thanks they received for their hospitality were less than adequate, however, especially since they'd managed to save enough to purchase their own place.
She wrote: "The issue is about a complete lack of appreciation. They say thank you at the time they know to say it, but nothing more - they haven't so much as cooked us a meal in the past six years.
"They haven't contributed to housework either. We were particularly hurt when they didn't invite us to their recent housewarming party."
She even explained that the plucky pair let themselves into their home at any time of day to ask for things, or take them.
She continued: "Despite them stepping into their independent life, they still expect to walk into our house at any time of the day or night to borrow things or ask for things they want. We repeatedly feel used and taken for granted.
"After the most recent liberty, I'm thinking of removing the key from the key safe, so they can't get in when we're out or asleep. Is this petty point scoring, or appropriate setting of some boundaries, after I feel they have taken our generosity for granted for too long? I would love to hear what other parents of grown-up children think."
Other parents were shocked at the behaviour of the pair, telling the mum that she needed to set much firmer boundaries with them, rather than just removing the key.
One wrote: "Rather than just removing the key from the key safe you need to sit them down and talk to them like the adults they are and tell them that they are now independent adults and need to act as such.
"By letting them move in and you doing all the cooking/cleaning/running around for them you allowed them to be the adolescents they were when they were last living at home. You made the mistake of not apportioning a share of the jobs and the bills to them back at the start.
"I think if you just remove the key from the box you are risking them feeling rejected without knowing that what you need now is privacy, you've done your bit and now you need your home back....then take the key out of the box or change the code."
Another fumed: "You weren't invited to their housewarming? Why not? I would flip my lid, to be honest, how ungrateful. Remove the key, and tell them it's your home not a free hotel for them to come and go as they please, that may make them open their eyes to the fact they've behaved like selfish, spoilt children. I'd be raging."
Someone else said: "I personally would sit down and let them know how you feel. Sounds like you have a good enough relationship with them enough for it not to get bitter and hopefully they will understand why you are upset."
What would you do in this situation? Let us know in the comments.
