Dear Coleen, This is a sensitive one. I’ve been with my boyfriend for three years and he’s great.
However, I don’t know how to speak to him about sex. He’s quite awkward in bed and there’s not much passion, which is a bit of a turn off.
I’m worried about bringing it up though, because when we first got together he struggled to get an erection the first few times, although we overcame it after several goes and things were fine.
What do you suggest?
Coleen says
Listen, sex is never an easy subject initially. When you’re in bed, try telling him what you like and what you don’t like, and ask him what he likes.
Talking about it when you’re in the throes of things can be really sexy and it opens up the conversation, so it’s easier to talk about again.
But I agree, it is sensitive and you have to be careful how you word things because you don’t want to affect his confidence and send him back to those early days.
This is an important part of your relationship, so bite the bullet and approach it in a gentle, fun and loving way.
