Mum shamed over husband's 'disrespectful' funeral outfit on hot day

By Katy Hallam & Alan Weston

A funeral mourner was accused of not having "been brought up properly" over his choice of outfit.

The man was accompanying his wife at her grandmother's funeral, which took place on a very warm day.

He didn't have a black suit or jacket, so instead went dressed "smartly" in a pair of black trousers, a white shirt with a black tie and black shoes.

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But the woman revealed her dad had told her afterwards that he believed the outfit was "inappropriate" and showed her husband "hasn't been brought up properly".

The mum shared the story on parenting forum mumsnet and asked whether no suit jacket at a funeral was a faux pas, reported Birmingham Live.

The post read: "We recently went to my grandmother's funeral. My husband has never had to wear a suit for work so he only has one suit in blue that he wears to weddings. For the funeral he wore black suit trousers, white shirt, black tie and black shoes. All ironed, shoes polished, etc. I thought he looked smart and respectful. It was a very warm day so no coat.

"A couple of weeks later my dad said to me that he felt my husband was dressed inappropriately because he wasn't wearing a full suit. He said it was highly disrespectful, that multiple people had commented on it, and the thing that upset me most; he said it showed that my husband hasn't been brought up properly.

"I was genuinely stunned. I haven't told my husband as he would be mortified if he knew. There we lots of men at the funeral wearing old ill-fitting suits, or jumpers and chinos, which to me looked a lot less smart. Is no suit jacket at a funeral a big faux pas?"

Users were supportive and told her there was nothing wrong with the outfit.

One wrote: "I think your dad is totally out of order, projecting something. Sounds like your husband was dressed fine. I really don't think it matters what people are wearing at a funeral as long as it's dark and smart."

A second said: "Your dad is out of order. Your dh's outfit sounded fine and perfectly respectable."

A third advised: "what your DH wore sounds fine. Funerals are a bit like weddings in that emotions run high. Your DF is grieving and lashing out. Be there for him and cut him a bit of slack. Don't tell your DH. He was fine. Sorry about your loss."

A fourth wrote: "Don’t tell your husband what was said but really give it to your father badly!"

And a fifth added: "I think there is nothing wrong with what your husband wore. At my husband's funeral, I do not recall what anyone wore. I do recall the people who made feeble excuses not to attend. I don’t think your dad can have been that upset at the loss of your grandmother if he had the headspace to notice what people were wearing."

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