Your experience of Disneyland Paris will very much depend on the age of the child that accompanies you.
If you have a six-year-old girl who insists on wearing her Frozen Elsa dress for the entire duration of the stay, and only wants to see princesses and cuddle Donald Duck, it will be entirely different to the visit I had with my 12-year-old son who has absolutely no fear and whose sole mission was to go on the most terrifying rides and roller coasters.
I would never have signed up for that of my own volition, but on the plus side, I did a lot of screaming… it was very cathartic, and I did actually feel better for it afterwards.
The point is, do your homework. Decide what you are likely to want to do and plan accordingly.
There are actually two parks right next door to each other – Disneyland and Walt Disney Studios – which you can easily flit between (with the right ticket).
There is a Disneyland Paris app with a map that tells you who each ride will suit (family friendly, big thrills etc), the length of the queue and times of the shows.
It also tells you which are eligible for Fastpass, which proved to be important.
We spent our first day basically standing in queues. There is a lot of good-natured waiting involved at Disneyland.
But before you join the back of a snaking line of people, make sure everyone meets the height requirement.
I could have wept for the woman who waited for 90 minutes only to be turned away at the last moment when her diminutive boy was discovered to be a couple of centimetres short of the measuring stick.
Also, be prepared for a short-lived thrill. For the Toy Story RC Racer for example, we waited for the best part of an hour for the one-minute ride.
Frankly, for me that was about 45 seconds too long as we were shot up a half pipe, seemingly suspended in thin air facing down, before ricocheting up the other side to then sit with our backs parallel to the ground at 82 feet in the air.
More screaming and a pounding heart as we clambered off, but also a silly grin.
On Day 1, we achieved six rides and saw the stunt driving show, but then bailed out early as the sun had gone down and we were freezing. Turns out you get cold hanging around in queues.
As well as comfy trainers being a must, gloves, a hat, plus layers, layers, layers are the way to go if you’re visiting in winter.
And don’t be tempted to take a big bag. It will quickly become cumbersome and uncomfortable as you walk a long way and queue.
Ideally don’t take a bag at all, but wear a coat with big pockets that zip up so you don’t lose the contents on any of the fiercer rides.
It also means you can circumvent the first queue of the day – the bag check. There are dedicated bag-free lanes to sail through.
On Day 2, we splashed out on Fastpasses – which make a massive difference.
This time we did 12 rides, the Studio Tram Tour in which we were caught in a flood and survived an earthquake, and watched the Disney parade.
Some rides we walked straight on, most were around a 10-minute wait, and none involved a queue of more than half an hour – which was for Star Wars: Hyperspace Mountain, the fastest, most ferocious roller coaster in the park, which loops you upside down in the dark and is definitely not for the faint-hearted.
We went for the Ultimate Fastpass One Time Speedy Access, which allows you to queue-jump once on 12 different rides. They start at around £52 each.
By the end of Day 2 we had done everything we wanted to and my 12-year-old thrill-seeker was satisfied. Disney done and dusted in 48 hours.
Need to know
- Be prepared to be un-British in order to get on the free shuttle from Staycity at popular times.
- The Disney parks open at 10am, so the bus to be on leaves at 9.40am. A common phenomenon at off-site hotels, the buses often can't squeeze all the passengers on at busy times.
- Be at the pick-up point early, and stand your ground at the front. Otherwise it’s a 40-minute wait until the next one.
- Fancy some culture? Take the RER where the shuttle bus drops you at Disney, and eight euros and 40 minutes later, get off at Charles de Gaulle Etoile at the top of the Champs-Elysées, directly under the Arc de Triomphe. Right there catch a hop-on hop- off tour bus which takes you to all the big sights.
- October half-term around Halloween is the busiest time of the year for Disneyland, with Christmas coming second. Over the summer months it's busy but the number of visitors is more spread out.
How to get there
Eurostar passenger fares from London St Pancras to Marne La Vallee start from £38 one way (adult), £27 (kids). See eurostar.com.
Alternatively, put your car on Le Shuttle at Ebbsfleet from £31 per car each way, and drive the three hours from Calais to Disneyland. See eurotunnel.com.
Where to stay
You know that smell when you get into a new car? Staycity in Marne-la-Vallée has that same vibe.
Only opened in September, the apartment hotel still has the sparkle of a new toy, with its chic design and clean lines all in a cheerful palette of yellow, grey, black and white.
Just a few minutes’ drive (or free shuttle) from Disneyland Paris and the Eurostar station, the mansion-like building has a touch of Disney about its turrets.
It overlooks the Disney golf course and is quiet, pretty and calm.
One morning I sat in bed with toast and coffee – made in our kitchenette – and watched the rain through the French windows dimpling into the swimming pool.
The perfect antidote to the crowds of the theme parks.
It might be functional, but Staycity is definitely stylish. I loved the colour scheme and Scandi-style flooring, which was always warm underfoot.
Coming in from a freezing day at Disney, running a deep bath to defrost in the clean, welcoming apartment was a delight. This is what good value looks like.
Go for a B&B deal at Staycity. Get fully-fuelled for the day with the fabulous breakfast, and spend less in the park on fast food. The hotel also does dinner, which is reasonably priced and family-friendly.
Alternatively there are restaurants in the nearby village, from typical French to Indian.
The small kitchens are incredibly well-equipped.
As well as the expected fridge and kettle, there is a modern four-ring hob, microwave, toaster, coffee machine (praise be!) and even a dishwasher.
Our one-bedroom apartment could sleep five. In the living room a large sofa and armchair converted easily into comfy beds.
Both rooms have smart TVs, much to the 12-year-old’s delight at being able to lie in bed and get YouTube on the telly.
Check out the nearby retail heaven at La Vallee Village or Val D’Europe shopping mall with 190 shops where you can buy anything from a cheap Pret coffee to Prada and Gucci.
You can find out more on the Staycity website.
What it costs
Our one-bed apartment for five people at Staycity Paris Marne-la-Vallée starts from £80 per night.
There are many different options, from a one-bed studio which can sleep four people and starts at £70 per night, to villas for up to 16 people from £325 per night.
Staycity also has a new Stay Sweet loyalty club which offers 10 per cent off when booking direct, early check-in and late check-out, room upgrades, free luggage storage and free cancellation up to 24 hours. Click here for details.
- A previous version of this article inaccurately named the Studio Tram Tour as the Warner Bros tour.
