Parents will of course naturally want their children to grow up confident within themselves, without feeling overly self-conscious about their physical appearance. It's therefore completely understandable that one mum recently took issue with another parent after she made a personal comment about her daughter's height and build, describing her as 'huge'.
According to this furious mum, her daughter is 'very tall, and sturdily built', as are her older brothers. She went on to emphasise that the young girl 'is not overweight by any measure', stating that 'her weight is in proportion to her height, I can see her ribs and her doctor has not expressed any concerns'.
Taking to Mumsnet, where she goes by the username @Foldinthecheese, the angered mum explained that her daughter, who will turn four in December, recently started attending a cooperative preschool where a parent is assigned to help out in the classroom each week. The comment was made during a recent field trip, which all parents had to attend.
Recalling the interaction, she wrote: "One of the other mums turned around and commented that she remembered my daughter from when she had helped in the classroom because ‘she is huge!’.
"I responded by saying that yes, she is very tall, but I’m annoyed that someone would think it appropriate to speak that way about a child in front of her. I don’t want my daughter growing up feeling unhappy about her size and build (as I very much did) and I don’t think comments like that will instill confidence."
The mother says she's 'always politely acknowledged' her daughter's height in the past when it's been brought up, but is now wondering whether it would be unreasonable to ask people to refrain from using such descriptions in front of her going forward.
Turning to her fellow Mumsnetters for advice, she continued: "I don’t want to create conflicts, but I don’t understand why anyone would think exclaiming about her size is a reasonable thing to do and I’d like to politely let them know that I’d rather they not do so, especially when they’ll have repeated contact with her over the year."
One person advised: "I’m a tall woman and have been described as ‘big’ in the past. I hate it and it makes me very self-conscious. I’m not overweight but I am tall and broad. I have usually gently corrected them and say ‘tall not big’ but I wish someone had helped me be more assertive about it. I think you should tell people not to use that language, explain why, and show your daughter that it’s ok to say this."
However, another suggested taking a different approach: "I was also a 'big' child. You won’t be able to stop people from making stupid comments. You’d make more of an impact teaching your daughter to be proud of her height and not to give a damn what anyone else says."
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