I love a bit of mud. From wallowing in the mud baths of Nha Trang in Vietnam to slathering myself in the stuff on the banks of the Dead Sea in Jordan, if there’s rejuvenating dirt to bathe in, I’m there. I try to reap the benefits of various mud masks as much as possible at home, but the resulting mess left behind in the shower leaves much to be desired.
Fellow mud bathing enthusiasts rejoice, then. There’s a Mud Cave Experience at Damu the new “revolutionary immersive space” at Fitzrovia’s trendy Mandrake Hotel. It’s wellness with a heavy dollop of theatrics, which is a fun change from the po-faced spa-as-medical-clinic trend. The interiors are all moody earth tones, which only intensifies once you reach the “cave” itself.
Surprisingly upstairs rather than in a lower level, the mud rooms still manage to conjure a suitably subterranean experience. The interiors bring to mind the organic architecture of Javier Senosiain, all gloopy curves painted in a chic shade of ruddy brown — think Farrow & Ball’s Etruscan Red.
After receiving careful instructions as to the order of the mud anointments, and a glass of water (regular hydration throughout is encouraged), you’re guided to the steam room to prep the pores.
Normally I’d rank a steam room, with their wet tiles and suffocating atmosphere, well below a sauna, but this is a steamer like no other. Dark and womb-like, you can tuck yourself into its hot fuggy recesses and truly relax.
In your own time, you approach the altar-style treatment area to go through a multi-step, DIY dirt bath, sluicing off in the carved shower nooks in-between. First, a full body salt scrub to prep your skin. Then on to the main event: mud. But not just any mud, this mud has been “hand-harvested” from the Austrian Alps. Your woo mileage will vary, but it is all very pleasing to the touch.
Several of the mud layers are available in bowls, with fun powders to mix yourself for facial applications. For one round of mud you are invited to reach your hand into one of two teardrop-shaped aperture’s and scoop the mud out with your hands and slather it on. It’s deeply satisfying, if rather unglamorous.
Wear a bikini if you can stomach it, otherwise you’ll be picking bits of clay out of your swimming cozzie for weeks. Special mention must go to the final layer of algae, which smells completely delicious — like green tea rather than the expected eau de pond.
Making a mess of the beautiful mud caves is not an issue, as the floors have handy sluice drains to presumably allow for a quick clean up between sessions.
You can sit on recessed benches in between applications, to allow the mud to do its business. While this should have been a moment to meditate on the holy union of dirt and water or something, I have to admit I got a bit bored and tempted to look at my phone. Not very mindful.
After a final, thorough, rinse (and making the most of the shampoo and conditioner to hand), you’re given your final instructions — moisturise yourself, hydrate with water, don’t dehydrate with alcohol — then shown to a relaxing room with daybeds surrounding a verdant arrangement of vast leafy plants beneath a neon hoop of lights. This rather groovy installation performs a dramatic self-misting on the hour. Sadly I missed the show, but the plentiful rose tea was a delicious way to come back to not being covered in various forms of decadent goo.
For £130 for 60 minutes, it’s not cheap, although it’s £220 for two if you go with a friend/lover you don’t mind looking grime-caked in front of. If you’re sensitive to different textures, or prefer your beauty treatments to be more hands on, this might not be the right one for you.
I would have liked there to have been some face and body moisturiser on hand in the (very lovely) changing rooms, as I hadn’t thought to bring my own.
All that being said, as I left Mandrake I felt incredibly light and floaty, that full-body relaxation feeling you usually only get after an intense massage. It also left my skin possibly the softest it’s ever been, and the effect lasted for weeks. If you’re looking to get down in the dirt, Damu is the way to do it.
Mud Cave Experience at Damu Spa, The Mandrake, £130 for 60 minutes, damu.co.uk
