Well totes not to be unpatriotic but just when we should be celebrating literally 10 amaze Dave years there has to be a war plus Europe – God Tusk, I can’t even – plus Christmas, plus poor Tamara, Dave’s like, babes, did she have to choose this EXACT time to file for bankruptcy? I’m like, you mean to reimagine her business, oh please, Tamara was a saint even to be a British trade ambassador when she was actually in New York, & now she is unfort not completely trading shopwise is it not super ambassadorial of her to wait until everyone is obsessed with bombing the Isils, sorry Isil as was? Dave’s like, do not forget the Heathrow delay, srsly what is the rush, I’m like, that, too, he’s like, then there’s Feldy, I’m like, IKR, poor old Feldy, you are being so dear, Dave’s like, well what are friends for – do I still ask him to my #10years party?
I’m like, srsly babes, you know how long Feldy has been slaving over the 2005 playlist #Westlife, srsly, can you believe he was not even Baron Feldman of Elstree back then? Dave’s like IKR, & the Shapster was still vice chairman & I had never heard of Philip Green #goodtimes :) I’m like, can you believe Instagram did not exist, he’s like, & *happiness* was still just happiness, hilair really, I’m like, this is weirder, in 2005 avocados were literally *just* avocados? He’s like, & Coulson was literally a person? I’m like, we are talking actual pre-Goop, I swear Gwyneth had not invented kale, what were we even eating? He’s like, IKR, it was all Daylesford in Chippy, remember country suppers at poor old Charlie’s with the poor old Freuds, God what happened to THEM!!!! I’m like, IKR, he’s like, & the poor old Clarksonator when did we last see him – I’m like, *Leveson face* I literally have no clue, he’s like, God don’t remind me, what was that horse’s name? I’m like – Rebekah? – IDK, weren’t you away with Hilto most of that time?
Dave’s like WHO? I’m like, you know, huskies, transformative, big society – he’s like, wait, omigod, bald, socks, green crap webcameron – babes, it is all coming back, poor old Steve – so who DO we still see from 2005? I mean, apart from dear Feldy? I’m like – Mummy?
