A mother and fitness coach, who faced the devastating loss of her first two pregnancies due to rare and unrelated health conditions, has spoken out about the solace she found in exercise.
Jade Millner, 35, unequivocally stated that "fitness, without a doubt, saved me" during an incredibly challenging period in her life.
Alongside her partner, Dan Whytock, also 35, Ms Millner’s first pregnancy in 2020 brought the joyous anticipation of their son, Peter. However, a three-month ultrasound scan revealed a serious and rare genetic disorder, Patau’s syndrome. Tragically, the baby died in the womb and was later removed during an operation.
The couple, from Bishop’s Stortford, Hertfordshire, faced further heartbreak the following year when they discovered they were pregnant again with a baby named Oscar.
During a three-month ultrasound scan, it was found the baby had gastroschisis, where a defect, or hole, develops in the abdominal wall, which prevented Oscar from growing normally and would result in “severe complications” – and the couple made the “impossible” decision to terminate the pregnancy.
Now a mother to three healthy children, Leo, aged two, and five-month-old twin girls Esme and Raya, Millner has urged other women who have experienced baby loss to “try and see light” as she highlighted the importance of “talking about what you are going through”.
“Fitness, without a doubt, saved me,” Ms Millner told PA Real Life.
“I started to appreciate what my body could do, and not hate my body, or hate myself.
“It started to become a privilege to train, a privilege to try and take care of my body.
“It gave me the strength to know ‘I can do this’.”
The couple discovered they were expecting their first child, named Peter, in November 2020.
During a three-month ultrasound scan however, it was discovered Peter had sadly died in the womb as a result of Patau’s syndrome.
According to the NHS, Patau’s syndrome is a serious, rare genetic disorder caused by having an additional copy of chromosome 13 in some or all of the body’s cells.
The disorder, which affects around one in every 4,000 births, severely disrupts normal development and, in many cases, results in miscarriage, stillbirth or the baby dying shortly after birth, the NHS says.
Ms Millner said she underwent an “intense” operation at a medical clinic to “remove Peter from (her)” in February 2021.
“It was excruciating afterwards and there was a lot of bleeding that I was not prepared for,” she said.
Keen to “try again”, the couple found out Ms Millner was pregnant in October 2021, with a baby they decided to name Oscar.
An “abnormality” was detected on a three-month ultrasound scan however, and Ms Millner was referred to the Royal London Hospital for further checks, where she said she met “the most incredible team”.
There, it was discovered Oscar had gastroschisis – a condition where the baby develops a defect, or hole, in the abdominal wall while still inside the womb, according to the NHS.
The condition, which occurs in around one in every 7,000 births, causes some of the bowel to escape through the hole and continue to develop outside the baby’s abdomen.
“It is something that can be fixed at birth, so we just forever tried to stay hopeful,” Ms Millner said.
“Every time we had checks though, things weren’t great and it was felt the gastroschisis was preventing Oscar’s limbs from growing – things weren’t functioning how they should have been.”
The couple said they were informed Oscar had paralysis in his limbs, and he would suffer with “several and severe” health complications.
Ms Millner said she and her husband were “asked to make a decision” about whether they wanted to continue with the pregnancy.
Becoming emotional, Ms Millner said: “You’re choosing to end his life – his life could potentially be OK but it’s extremely unlikely.
“You just weigh up everything in your head because you want to be hopeful, but you think about what life they would have.
“There’s just so many endless complications and it got to the point where we had to decide that he wasn’t going to make it.”
Ms Millner’s pregnancy was terminated with a needle at 25 weeks at the Royal London Hospital in April 2022.
Several days later, Ms Millner gave birth to her stillborn baby in a nine-hour labour at the Princess Alexandra Hospital in Harlow.
In the weeks and months following, Ms Millner said she could not eat or sleep, she “couldn’t stop crying” and she struggled to leave the house.
She also slowly returned to work as a gym coach and “worked hard for years” to channel her energy into fitness, saying it “saved” her.
In September 2022, Ms Millner launched her own business, EmpowerMe, a women’s online training programme, with the aim of helping women and mothers to become strong and confident.
She then found out she was pregnant with her now healthy two-year-old son Leo.
Then, in August 2024, Ms Millner discovered she was pregnant again – this time with twin girls. Esme and Raya were born on April 14 this year.
Ms Millner advised other women in her position to “try and see light”.
To find out more, visit Jade’s website at empowermehq.com
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