You know it is a slow day for tittle-tattle when one mid-market tabloid includes in its rumours column (apparently it's the talk of football) the following hearsay: Aldershot will be mathematically promoted if they get one point from their last four games while, and keep this under your hat, Swansea were promoted on Saturday after beating Gillingham 2-1. That is all on the hush hush though, so don't go spreading it around, ok?
Along with the vicious rumours that Derby might be relegated and Arsenal are unlikely to win the Champions League this season, what else do we have for you today? Leading the way is the news that Steve Bruce spent his Saturday evening watching Zoltan Gera ply his trade for West Brom against Watford (which, apparently, might have finished in a 1-1 draw if the papers are to be believed) and is considering bringing him to the JJB for next season's relegation struggle.
Everton will be able to rightfully claim that Steven Pienaar is 100% Toffee in the next 48 hours as they iron out the details of a permanent £2m move from Borussia Dortmund. However, the South African will not be joined at Goodison by Wolves starlets Wayne Hennessey and Sylvan Ebanks-Blake who are going nowhere, according to the Wolves chairman with the trendy media name, Jez Moxley.
Rumours to be filed in the folder marked stale include Aston Villa to swoop for Jussi Jaaskelainen and Ronaldinho to move to Milan once a fee of between £15m and £21m is agreed. But wait, what's this? It's only a twist in the Ronaldinho saga as Inter arrive cheque-book in hand to gazump their neighbours' bid for the Brazilian. Unlike Ronaldinho, this could run and run.
And, finally, Sunderland are leading the chase for Crewe and Wales Under-21 goalkeeper Owain Fon Williams and Manchester United have moved six points clear at the top of the Premier League with a 2-1 win over Arsenal, but you didn't hear it from us, right?
