OK guys, the Christmas schedule you’ve all been waiting for – guys? If we can just huddle momentarily? So, as your hardworking Christmas hubmeister, I thought this year’s theme could be Best Christmas Evah, are we all OK with that? So that means it’s not just the company party, and the canteen lunch, and the children’s tea – btw can everyone reply, asap, David we’re counting on you for Father Christmas, if you want to practise your hohohos, I’m guesstimating XXXXL for your costume?
All team leaders should have the mince pie tokens by now, and for Secret Santa we’ll draw lots in a second, if we could have the presents under the tree by mid-December, and I’m suggesting minimum £25 spend, so everyone gets something nice – no sex toys, am I right John? And if you could do your wrapping in jewel colours, so it matches the new baubles – and I don’t want to nag, Noah, but the crib is usually in reception by now?
Going forward, anyone else think it’s time we did a festive desk competition? With a prize for the best decorations when the MD comes down for quiz night? We’ll keep the festive tombola, bottles in by Friday please, but individual desks would look so special, sure Sophia, low concept is fine, at my last work I did a simple but effective Lapland theme, with thousands of tiny trees and a real ice rink with a miniature train track and music from the Nutcracker – thoughts to me by close of play? Party-wise, anyone else think fancy dress would be a super way to break the ice?
So unless anyone wants to suggest a theme – no? – fine, mine was Elves and Safety Nite, geddit? Which gives everyone loads of options – sure Robert, don’t join in if you won’t feel left out – but the best news is, you’ll be needing passports, I’ve managed to relocate the entire event to a karaoke barn in the Pas de Calais! For just an extra £175 that’s return ferries, medieval burlesque act, overnight stay and two glasses of sparkling wine. Absolutely no pressure, if there’s anyone here who’s not keen on team-building, feel free to vocalise. Nobody? Great!
