As I tried to drive through the narrow lane riddled with potholes, the car’s left rear-view mirror brushed against one of the three elderly ladies who were walking side by side. Laden with guilt, I parked the vehicle a few metres in front and walked to her to apologise. The indignation and irritation writ on her face eased the moment I offered my apologies.
“We also should not have occupied the entire road,” she said. The women smiled accepting my apologies. I pondered over the incident later. I should have slowed down when I neared them. What if I have not accepted my error? I would have soon forgotten the incident, but it would have left a sore feeling in the women’s mind. My acceptance ostensibly made them understand their mistake too.
We all commit mistakes, but how often do we take ownership of them? The higher one is placed in the societal rung, the more important it is to accept mistakes. I believe that acceptance of mistakes is important to developing one’s persona and on a larger scale, to help society’s betterment.
The most important reason for failure to accept mistakes is our ego. Especially if the offender holds a superior position in the family, organisation or society, the less inclined he will be to accept his error. The person creates a falsified impression in his mind and attributes the mistake to someone junior or the problem itself. As people around are aware of his unapologetic attitude, they will be talking behind his back. It obviously brings disrepute to one’s position and stature. Contrarily, if he takes ownership of the mistake, it would elevate his image among his peers and colleagues.
Recurring incidents
Leaders across the world have committed mistakes and to cover that up, more mistakes have been committed. Major political scandals and financial scams are typical examples of such acts. Rarely do we come across leaders who have accepted their errors in judgment or handling of major governmental decisions that have backfired.
When we fail to accept our mistakes, it soon fades from our memory and we are sure to commit it again. It prevents any chances of redemption. Most hospitals have a monthly meeting called morbidity auditing. Typically a group of doctors across all specialties meet to discuss complications that happened in the previous month. This exercise is never a blame-game or one for naming and shaming. Rather it provides a chance for all doctors to learn from the mistakes of themselves and others. Measures to prevent the recurrence of the complication is discussed to form standard protocols. A protocol in practice also enables future doctors, who were not part of the meeting, to avoid similar medical errors. A doctor who shies away from revealing his complication or who passes on the blame to his junior or who indicts the patient or disease for the complication, is unlikely to become a better doctor. When one makes his junior a scapegoat for a mistake, he plants a bigger poison in society. The tyro learns a wrong habit, which he is likely to perpetuate in his career.
Accepting our mistakes gives us immense courage and strength to foresee and handle similar problems later in life. A lie or two to cover it makes us more foolish and culpable. If we don’t need to lie about a mistake, we don’t need to remember anything. There is an old saying, “When you commit a mistake, you are in a hole and if you try to cover it, you will be digging further. The hole becomes bigger.”
If someone comes out clean about an error committed, we should not disparage him. It deters honesty in people. Accepting mistakes and talking about them makes it a learning exercise for all. As we learn from it, we find ways to prevent it. When we successfully avoid mistakes, we can teach others. We serve as a source of inspiration to our children and juniors.
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