Radio presenter Shelagh Fogarty was live on air, discussing drugs harm with Detective Inspector Ian Golsborough, when he interrupted her with words to strike fear into even the brave: "Sorry, I just saw a mouse." At this Fogarty's voice rose an octave to something approaching a squeal. "Oh my God! Oh! Oh, how horrible!" Within moments the DJ was hurriedly rounding off the conversation, knees safely on the chair – only for the creature to reappear, with Fogarty screaming, "It's on the bloody table!"
What is it about mice that scares or upsets us so?
In theory, we share our indoor space with all kinds of creatures. If a mouse wants to warm him or herself beneath your floorboards and surface now and then for the odd snack, what harm is there in that? In practice, however, it can be tricky to remain composed. There are countless mouse-in-house stories. One colleague tells of the time he fancied a bagel, put it in the toaster, only to return and hear a strange squeaking noise. You can possibly guess the rest, at least up to the part where, unsure what to do, he left the mouse and bagel in place and Googled "mouse in toaster". Apparently, it's a common problem: he opted to bin the toaster without retrieving the bagel.
There are stories of mice who, finding no other escape route, have politely been shown the front door and, accommodatingly, departed. But these are rare.
I have spent many winters in pursuit of mice: one was so bold and complacent about the kitchen that I even managed to catch him by slamming down the bin on top of him. But his little tail poked out and the surprisingly deep mewling (was he in pain, or just scared under there?) went on for long enough to make me relent and let him go. "That'll teach you!" I yelled at the tail disappearing under the cupboards. But within moments, he was back. It had to be the same one. It was like the film Duel, with the mouse as the invisibly driven truck.
"There's been a big increase in mice activity – domestic and businesses," says Andrew Chowdhury, who manages the Manchester branch of Prokill Pest Control. He says Fogarty's mouse isn't a rarity; both Manchester United and Manchester City have had mice incidents in recent weeks. What makes mice so unsettling? "It's the volumes," Chowdhury says. "You very rarely get one mouse. You can have hundreds in one property. They'll eat through your skirting, they'll eat through your doors." At which point, presumably, all the other mice can just walk right in.
Comfortingly, Chowdhury says that even he, pro killer, starts when he sees one. "You tend to catch them out of the corner of your eye, the periphery of your vision, and you'll jump."
So what is it about mice that is so unnerving? Is it the way they move, or the way they seem to break into not only your home, but your head space, gnawing away at your imagination until even knots on floorboards look as if they are about to jump? All ideas and stories gratefully received.
