Beware people who own porcelain clowns
It’s hard to know where to start with the astonishing, terrifyingly watchable, Meet the Ukippers (BBC2, Sunday). If nothing else, it was a very bad advert for being a middle-aged white person. And definitely bad PR for the owners of extensive collections of clown ornaments. Ukip councillor Rozanne Duncan attempted to defend some things she had said: “I used the word ‘negroes’ as you would Asians, Chinese, Jews … It’s a description …” Stop using words, Rozanne! Stop! She then got a bit stuck on “the Jews”, adding: “They’ve usually got a nose that has a bit of a curve ... It’s a description ...” That’s it. No more words for you. End of word usage. Silent clown communication only from now on.
The grizzly bear is not a great dance
The charleston doesn’t have anything to fear from this ursine pantomime enacted by Madeleine (Olivia Grant) in grizzly pursuit of Ralph, private secretary to the Viceroy, on Indian Summers (Channel 4, Sunday). Wikipedia: “During the dance, dancers would yell out, ‘It’s a bear!’” Now, that’s my kind of dance. I’m still loving the beauty of the filming and the languid pace of the action. But I’m worried about my mother’s verdict on the show: “It’s too slow.” That’s your target audience right there and it’s getting antsy. Better bring on the turkey trot.
Sharon Horgan gives good fringe
In the catch-up episode of Catastrophe (Channel 4, Friday), Sharon was Facebook-stalking a love rival. Clicking through the photographs of the annoyingly blonde, annoyingly beautiful woman with spectacular “bangs”, she subconsciously starts pulling her hair across her face to create a fake fringe. Horgan brilliantly captures her own inner monologue without saying a word: “I wonder if I would look better if ...” And just at that moment Rob (Rob Delaney) comes through the door and catches her looking like It from The Addams Family. Just adorable.
The Voice is to have a sixth series
This week they appealed for contestants for 2016. This is terrifying. Who allowed this? The Voice (BBC1, Saturday) feels confused and confusing. It’s as if there’s some kind of sleight of hand going on. Or at least they’re not sure how to present what they’re doing to the audience. They make all this big fuss about hand-picking the teams and turning their big red chairs around for the perfect person and then it turns out that Will.i.am is saddled with a random male Tina Turner impersonator from the Forest of Dean? You couldn’t make it up. Or, rather, you could. It must have been fixed. And I thought The Voice was making a stand against this kind of thing and trying to “keep it real”? Pah.
Gogglebox is back!
Gogglebox (Channel 4, Friday) is back! Yay! Yay! But where are “boozy posh pair” Steph and Dom? Nowhere to be seen. Boo. Boo. It’s not clear what’s going on. Channel 4 has not announced that they have left. But it seems odd they weren’t in this episode. Meanwhile the German guy had it right about Jamie Oliver’s squirrel cuisine: “English people put everything in the pie. They fucking perverts.” Finally, an acceptable and accurate racial remark.
