A maths teacher who lied to pupils, saying she had been shot in a war zone and suffered serious injuries, has been banned from the classroom.
Alexandra Slay, who worked at Epsom and Ewell High School in Surrey from December 2016 until she resigned in November 2023, told pupils she was in the Australian army, and on one occasion, texted one student pretending to be another soldier and claiming she had been severely wounded.
After she resigned, a disciplinary hearing took place following concerns about her communications with pupils, and she was then referred to the Teaching Regulation Agency, which held a professional conduct panel.
She was found to have sent thousands of emails to pupils between 2020 and 2023 and gave out her phone number.
One email read: “I am actually going to do this – even though it is slightly different. I am going to give you my digits – you can get it from retriever. As I am getting tired of emailing…”
Ms Slay also sent handwritten letters to pupils, the content of which the panel found to be deeply inappropriate and unprofessional.
Pupils were instructed not to open the letters until a certain time and were also encouraged to keep them a secret, as she told them to keep “pinky promises” and to confide in her about personal matters.
An email to a pupil in July 2022 read: “You said to be honest/transparent with you with my feelings (especially when I seem like I am sinking). I can’t seem to put my thoughts into an email so I spend sometime writing on the beach.
“I am trying to be honest so that I don’t unintentionally hurt you by pushing you away (even though even [sic] ounce of me have been trying to come up with excuses to). For your eyes only”.
Ms Slay fabricated a narrative to pupils which involved her having a role in the army, where she would often take trips to war zones, undertake training and be involved in conflict.
A text message to a pupil read: “Hey, just letting you know I have arrived and reached base.”
Texts from her phone number to a pupil, which purported to be from a “Lt. D Blackburn” indicated that had sustained serious injuries.
Those messages said:
- “Under the advice of my chief and back up plan from Cpt. Slay, I am giving update on Cpt. Slay’s condition … Earlier in the day, Cpt. Slay and several others have been severely wounded. Cpt. Slay sustained two rounds to her abdomen and lost severe amounts of blood … Cpt. Slay has been in surgery to remove two rounds from her abdomen.”
- “Cpt. Slay has woken up and her vitals and temperature have stabilised … As Cpt. Slay is awake. I will be passing her belongings including her phone back to her.”
- “Cpt. Slay left this message for me to pass on to you. ‘If things turn for the worst. Please be proud and know that I have tried by best’.”
- “Cpt. Slay … went into cardiac arrest due to shock to her body. However they have got Cpt. Slay back now, but her pulse is very weak.”
- “Cpt. Slay vitals flatlined at 07:30 this morning however doctors were able to revive her”
- “I know I shouldn’t be saying this and will probably be reprimanded for it. However, Cpt. Slay wants to stay and finish the operation. However, I ask that where possible, please can you all talk her out of it”.
During her disciplinary interview, when asked about the messages, Ms Slay said they were “all fabricated”. She said that she made up the stories so that she could feel like she belonged.
The panel found it was a significant breach of boundaries for Ms Slay to have given pupils her personal contact details. In doing so, Ms Slay was able to develop an inappropriate relationship with the pupils, it found.
“It allowed her to communicate with these pupils outside of school time, with the content of those messages going beyond that of a teacher-pupil relationship”, the panel said.
Another text message read: “What is intimacy look or feel like to you? (Be careful with this one) …”.
As part of this exchange, Ms Slay also sent a message which detailed her views on intimacy, saying: “Intimacy for me goes beyond the physical impact (sure that is important), but to me emotional intimacy builds a relationship from strength to strength.”
The panel found that Ms Slay’s actions constituted conduct that may bring the profession into disrepute. She has been banned from teaching indefinitely.
She may apply for the prohibition order to be set aside, but not until 21 April 2028.
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