Don't panic.
Fashion month is well and truly upon us, and although the sea of show invites, afterparties and street style crowds seems altogether too much, we've got you covered with these top tips.
1. Upon entering the show, find an usher to point out where your seat is positioned. If you can’t identify them, just head to the block stated on your invite. If your invite states Seat A-3-15, it probably means you are in Block A, on the third row and in seat 15, but it’s really anyone’s guess! I once went to a Joe Casely-Hayford show as a young buyer and was feeling particularly smug, having received an invite that stated 1A, which made me feel super VIP. It was only upon arrival that I realised there was only one continuous row, and everyone was 1A.
2. If you lose your invite, don’t print off an email. That is very yesteryear, and would make Susie Bubble frown.
3. Equip yourself with water, mints, nuts, wear layers and download games on your phone; a seasoned showgower will tell you that in this game, you could die of thirst, hunger, being too cold, being too hot, and/or boredom. There’s a lot of queueing up and waiting around. Opal Fruits are making a come back; get a family size bag, as that is the only way you will make friends.
4. Charge 5 spare batteries for your iPhone, as you’re going to go wild on the gram.
5. If you see someone you know, play it cool as they may be concentrating so hard on being relevant, you could risk cracking their veneer.
6. Don’t wear mules, as it’s a given you’d lose one in the melee when everyone rushes out to get to the next show.
7. You get extra points for wearing the men’s Celine logo T-shirt, new season Prada striped cashmere scarf with black and white sequins in varying sizes, or the new smaller shopper style bag, but could lose more if you wear one of those puffa coats bigger than seat width.
