FULL TIME: Manchester City 3-0 West Bromwich Albion
Dzeko is six inches away from threading a shot into the bottom-left corner from 20 yards. And that’s that. West Brom were always up against it, in the wake of that early red card, and so it proved. City ran out easy winners, and on another day would have had a hatful. No doubt there’ll be some sort of controversy regarding the mistaken identity, McAuley walking instead of Dawson, but does it really make much difference? Ten men are ten men are ten men. West Brom remain comfortable in mid-table, above the relegation worries. City meanwhile move to within three points of Chelsea, who have two games in hand. But the title’s still a possibility, albeit a long shot. A torrid week comes to a more than satisfactory end.
90 min: There will be two added minutes. “Is Danny Mills the world’s most disgruntled man?” wonders Charles Antaki. “After running out of outrage about the red card to vent on Radio 5 Live, he’s turned his attention to the way TV showed Messi’s nutmeg of Milner multiple times. And that was three days ago. You have to worry about the man’s blood-pressure.”
89 min: Sessegnon is replaced by Mulumbu.
88 min: Navas dribbles down the right and flicks a ball inside for Aguero, clear on the penalty spot. But the striker miscontrols, allowing Lescott to arrive on the scene and smack the ball clear. Aguero is a study in frustration.
86 min: McAuley’s 89-second red card, by the way, was the quickest in the Premier League this season. Berahino is replaced by Anichebe.
84 min: Jovetic exchanges passes with Aguero down the inside-right channel and breaks into the area. Dawson gently shoulder charges him off the ball. No penalty, though one’s claimed with vigour.
83 min: Everyone appears to be winding down.
81 min: Silva, who has as always been excellent today, is replaced by Milner.
80 min: In the middle of the park, Fernando slides in on Morrison. Free kick. No yellow card, which is a pretty poor non-decision, as that was as late an intervention as you’ll see, if not particularly malicious.
78 min: Bony goes off, Dzeko comes on.
GOAL! Manchester City 3-0 WBA (Silva 77)
Aguero chases after a ball down the inside-left challenge. He crosses. Dawson takes one from karma in the face. Corner. From which Clichy reaches the byline and pulls one back for Jovetic, to the left of the D. Jovetic’s shot is flying wide left, but it’s flicked into the bottom left by Silva. A lovely touch. This is over. It’s long been over, but it really is now.
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76 min: Another free kick for West Brom, just inside the City half. It’s lumped towards Olsson, who is the danger man at these set pieces. But the big defender is overly clumsy and concedes the foul.
74 min: Well, that would have changed things. Perhaps that’ll wake City up. The home team had been snoozing for a few minutes. And yes, they go up the other end, Bony going close from 20 yards, his show flying off to the left.
73 min: But they trudge upfield and earn themselves a corner down the right. From which they nearly score! And they certainly should have. Olsson flicks it on to the far post, where Berahino must surely head home from a couple of yards. But he hammers his effort off the crossbar, and Lescott loops the follow-up over. What an astonishing miss from point-blank range!
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71 min: City have eased off a little. West Brom have been afforded a couple of opportunities to run the clock down with a few passing triangles in the middle of the park. They’re not really going anywhere, but avoiding a thumping is probably uppermost on their minds.
68 min: Back up the other end, the new arrival Jovetic cuts in from the left and, on the edge of the D, looks to curl one into the bottom right. Myhill is beaten, but the ball doesn’t quite come back in and flies an inch or two wide of the right-hand post. A very decent effort, though, that.
66 min: A high ball’s hoicked into the City area. Olsson goes up with Hart at the near post, and his presence wins a corner. His knee also crumps into Hart’s trouser arrangement as the two compete in the air. Ooyah oof. The resulting set piece comes to nothing, punched clear by Hart, his special machinery having finally stopped jangling.
65 min: Sessegnon embarks on a 50-yard dribble down the right from deep. Fernando bundles him over, and the free kick is celebrated by the away support with a large comic cheer. Before the free kick is taken, Jovetic replaces Lampard.
62 min: Navas slips Zabaleta in on the overlap down the right. The full back, pelting into the area at full speed, can’t quite control the pass. Had he done so, he’d have been in on goal. The ten men of West Brom are really on the ropes here.
60 min: Myhill is in Staunch Mode. He saves a couple of close-range efforts from Silva. How on earth is this still 2-0?!
58 min: Aguero comes in from the right, and hammers a shot off the left-hand post. Then Bony tries to follow the ball in, but he smacks his shot off the crossbar! It’s a surprise that the frame of the goal is still standing, such is the relentless hammering its just taken. Any certificates of structural adequacy are now invalid for insurance purposes.
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57 min: Silva bothers the Baggies down the inside left now. He turns through 360 degrees, carefully and at his own pace, like a dog preparing for a snooze. He then slides a pass down the middle for Lampard, who breaks into the area and sidefoots weakly straight at Myhill. On another day, Lampard could easily have had a hat-trick. He’s certainly had three very good shooting chances in the West Brom area. You’d normally expect a better return than this.
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55 min: Silva drops a shoulder down the right and fizzes a low cross to the near post. Aguero zips in and connects, but his close-range effort hits Myhill. A few inches either side, and that was the third. Aguero wears the wry look of a man beginning to think this might not be his day.
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54 min: Berahino battles well down the right wing, and West Brom have a chance to knock it around in City’s half for a while. All very strange, in the context of this game. But City are soon breaking upfield, Bony travelling at pace down the right. Silva has a whack from the edge of the box, but it’s straight at the keeper.
50 min: City are knocking on the door here. Aguero scampers into the area down the right, but his low shot is kicked away at the near post by Myhill. Then from the corner, Bony sends a powerful effort goalwards from 12 yards, level with the left-hand post, but it’s an inch or two wide of the target. West Brom will be doing very well indeed to keep this to 2-0, because City are past masters in ramping it up during the second half.
48 min: Aguero is buzzing around in high-octane mode. He obviously fancies a goal or two. He’s scooting down the inside-right channel and knocked over by Olsson, but doesn’t get the free kick. “Are we sure Morrissey didn’t take the water with him to LA?” wonders Linda Howard. Certainly the large cloud that permanently hovers over his head, yes. That’s got to have some sort of negative impact on the Mancunian ecosystem.
46 min: It isn’t long before City are on the attack. Bony sends a whistler towards the top right from 20 yards, but Myhill is behind it. Lovely football all round. “Glad to see you give stramash, such a useful word, an airing,” writes Alec McAulay. “Its most famous patron was Arthur Montford, of course, though ‘What a stramash!’ was only his second most commonly used phrase. ‘Disaster for Scotland!’ was first.”
And we’re off again! The referee Neil Swarbrick has admitted that he got the red-card decision wrong. Simple case of mistaken identity. Fair play. We’re only human, born to make mistakes, as Phil Oakey once sang. No doubt people will leave it at that, accept that people aren’t perfect, and not drone on about it for years and years, banging on about bloody video evidence. Eh?
Half-time refreshments: Bad luck. There are none. According to the bloke on the PA system, there’s limited running water at the City of Manchester Stadium, due to “circumstances beyond our control”. Probably an idea to give the powder rooms a body swerve. And pity the poor West Brom coach driver, who’ll be sharing space with a team giving off two different kinds of funk.
HALF TIME: Manchester City 2-0 West Bromwich Albion
Aguero has a blooter from the edge of the box. It’s blocked. Then Silva slips him into the area down the left. He’s one on one with Myhill, albeit at a tight angle. The result is very Neymar versus Hart. And that’s that for the opening half. City have had 16 efforts on goal, to West Brom’s naught. Such a dynamic was guaranteed after 89 seconds, when a red card was brandished to the wrong man. Accordingly, Fletcher gets right up in the referee’s grille as the teams leave the field. Expect more of the same in the second half. No flipping!
45 min: Bony skates in from the right and considers a shot. He eventually slips the ball inside to Fernando, whose shot is deflected wide left by his own man in Lampard.
43 min: Aguero cuts in from the left and has a batter. Myhill parries. Baird’s clearance is dreadful, allowing Zabaleta to take up possession and try a curler towards the bottom left. The keeper gathers. West Brom are all over the shop now.
GOAL! MATCH FARCE II! Manchester City 2-0 WBA (Fernando 40)
A corner for City down the right. West Brom have Mangala’s effort, a weak high-kick level with the right-hand post from 12 yards, mopped up. But Olsson hangs a leg out, just as Myhill was preparing to gather. The ball dribbles to Fernando, who is six yards out and sidefoots into the bottom right. Hats off to Fernando for his sportsmanship, for he converted that chance without guffawing loud and long. What dismal defending. On the touchline, Tony Pulis is on a rolling boil.
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38 min: Navas turns the engine on and zooms down the right. He sends a bouncing cross straight through the area. A decent ball, but neither Bony nor Aguero can time their leaps. West Brom will do well to make it to half time without conceding again.
36 min: Silva, on the final day of the 2015 Six Nations, converts for three rugby points. “Thank goodness most of the action is in the shade,” sighs Linda Howard. “My television is making any action in the sun into a hodge-podge of indiscernible players. White? Light blue? Dunno. Why did the sun show up? Did Morrissey leave town?” Isn’t he living in LA these days? In search of an In-N-Out Burger, perhaps.
35 min: Morrison bundles Silva over, just to the right of the West Brom D, as the City playmaker was trying to sort his feet out with a view to taking a shot. This free kick is in a very dangerous position.
33 min: Silva fizzes a pass down the inside left and into the area for Bony, who flicks inside to release Lampard into a little space. And there’s another poor shot from the usually goal-happy midfielder, dragged wide left. West Brom were prised apart there, so close to a picture-book goal.
31 min: Navas, on the left-hand corner of the area but with his back to goal, spins on a sixpence and lashes a stunning shot towards the top right. Myhill, at full length, tips round for a corner, from which nothing comes. That was an up-out-of-your-seats effort. City are beginning to play now.
29 min: Silva dances down the left, reaching the byline, then cutting back before playing Clichy in down the flank with a clever reverse pass. Every drop of blood in Clichy’s body rushes to his noggin, and the ball’s lashed wildly behind. City had players in the middle there, and they’re all waving their arms in frustration.
GOAL! Manchester City 1-0 WBA (Bony 27)
... there’s a stramash in the middle of the box. West Brom clear to the right wing, but the ball’s recycled into the middle, where Kompany slides a pass forward towards the box. On the edge of the area, Fernando helps it on, the ball looping down the inside-left, clipping Baird, and falling to Bony, who can’t miss from six yards. His finish is delightful, nevertheless, a powerful sidefoot into the top left.
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26 min: Aguero teases Morrison down the inside-right flank, before cutting inside and lashing a low shot goalwards. Deflection. Corner. From which ...
24 min: City are beginning to look dangerous. First Aguero is sprung clear into the area down the left, but he’s flagged offside, correctly, half a yard off. Then Silva cuts in from the left and blams an effort towards the top right. Myhill parries brilliantly, and the loose ball is mopped up.
21 min: City are totally on top of West Brom, the visitors camped in the box. Fernando, in the middle, slips the ball to the left of the D, where Lampard has a clatter. It’s blocked pretty much at source.
19 min: Lovely rat-a-tat passing triangles involving Aguero and Silva down the inside left. City reach the area, and the ball’s slipped into the centre for Lampard, who has space to shoot, pretty much on the penalty spot. That one’s shanked wildly to the right of goal, a most uncharacteristic effort. Lampard screams to the skies. City are already showing signs of frustration, but they probably need to calm down, because look at the possession stat from the last five minutes: City have enjoyed 92% to West Brom’s 8%! You don’t see that very often.
16 min: Aguero pitching-wedges a delicious ball down the inside-right channel to release Navas into the area. He’s got time and space, but it’s a tight angle for a shot, so he cuts it back into a thicket of powder blue: Bony, Aguero and Silva. It’s the latter who gets a snap shot away from ten yards, but it’s not particularly snappy, and loops into the arms of Myhill.
14 min: And Aguero tries his best, scuttling down the middle of the park, then drifting to the right, before lashing an effort goalwards. Not particularly powerful, nor accurate, but it lifts the crowd. A little. It’s a tense atmosphere.
12 min: The atmosphere’s fairly muted. City’s support are understandably deflated. The team need to pick them up, they owe them a little something.
9 min: Justice for Jeff. Both sets of fans join in the applause.
8 min: Zabaleta slides a pass inside from the right. Silva takes a touch, drops a shoulder as he glides inside, and has a whack from the right-hand edge of the D. Deflected. Corner. And from that, Bony’s shot from the edge of the area is blocked by Fletcher, and Silva has another dig, but that one’s well wide of the goal.
7 min: It’s attack versus defence already. West Brom are camped in their own area, obviously of a mind to shore things up first and foremost, while they clear their heads. City are pinging it around left, right and centre, but can’t find a chink in the West Brom armour. Not yet. Plenty of time to go, of course. Plenty of this to come.
5 min: On the touchline, Tony Pulis stands with his hands in his pockets, performing a silent seethe. His side do deserve to be down to ten men, of course. But what a nonsense.
3 min: Lampard blooters the resulting free kick into the wall. There goes that chance. So anyway, this sending off. McAuley clattered into Bony after Dawson had impeded the striker. But Bony had already fallen before regrouping and going again, and there was a whistle. McAuley’s challenge came after that, and in any case, if that was the foul West Brom were penalised for, it’d have been a penalty, for that coming together occurred in the area. That’s a rare old balls up, and no mistake.
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Red card! McAuley off!
1 min 29 sec: They might have to change their tack now. Bony bursts down the inside-left channel. He’s ready to break into the box, but is bundled over just outside of it by Dawson. The referee has no choice but to brandish the red card. However he’s sent the wrong man off! McAuley is shown the red! What a complete farce!
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And we’re off! West Brom get the ball rolling. It’s not long before Berahino is breaking down the left flank. Nothing comes of the run, but it’s a sign that West Brom have turned up to play.
The teams are out! City, in their famous powder blue, and West Brom, in their not-so-classic white with navy pinstripe number, take to a sun-flecked City of Manchester Stadium pitch. Right Here, Right Now by Brighton & Hove Albion’s Norman Cook booms from the PA. If only there was a popular musician who banged on about Manchester City all the time, huh. We’ll be off in a minute!
Frank Lampard starts! The erstwhile Chelsea pensioner gets in City’s first XI for the first time in more than two months, as Manuel Pellegrini rings the changes. Six, he’s made. Wilfried Bony, Pablo Zabaleta, Eliaquim Mangala, Fernando and Gael Clichy also return, with Yaya Toure missing through injury and Samir Nasri dropped. Meanwhile for the visitors, Boaz Myhill replaces the injured (and hapless) Ben Foster in goal while Chris Baird and Jonas Olsson come in for the suspended Chris Brunt and Brown Ideye.
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Manchester City: Hart, Zabaleta, Kompany, Mangala, Clichy, Jesus Navas, Fernando, Lampard, Silva, Bony, Aguero.
Subs: Sagna, Milner, Dzeko, Caballero, Fernandinho, Demichelis, Jovetic.
West Bromwich Albion: Myhill, Dawson, McAuley, Lescott, Olsson, Sessegnon, Fletcher, Baird, Gardner, Morrison, Berahino.
Subs: Wisdom, Anichebe, Davidson, Pocognoli, Mulumbu, Nabi, Rose.
Referee: Neil Swarbrick (Lancashire)
And so we reach the end of a torrid week for Manchester City. Defeat last weekend at Burnley, followed by evisceration in Barcelona. Joe Hart was their only player to leave Camp Nou in moral credit; it was a rout in all but scoreline. But City need to pick themselves up, and quick, so they’d best look at it this way: any team not as accomplished as the English champions would most likely have found themselves on the receiving end of an actual rout. And, hey, what if that Sergio Aguero penalty had gone in? Oh me, oh my. It’s a thin line between success and opprobrium, all right.
City are walking another thin line this lunchtime. They need to beat West Bromwich Albion if they’re to retain any hope whatsoever of bothering Chelsea in the championship race. If they fail to do so, it’s bye bye title, hello scrap with Arsenal, Manchester United, Liverpool, Southampton and Spurs for a place in next season’s Champions League. This side should be better than that, and they should win today, against a side they’ve beaten six times in a row in the league. Then again, their recent form is appalling: they’ve only won three of the last 12, and there’s a real sense of fin de siècle at City which might not do them any favours in their quest. It’s a thin line they walk, all right.
But while West Brom’s form against City may not augur well for the Baggies, their recent revival under Tony Pulis suggests they’ll be no pushover. They’d lost seven out of ten matches before Pulis arrived; they’ve only been defeated three times in 13 since, and two of those were the direct result of being caught in the eye of Whirlwind Tim, currently ripping through north-east Birmingham. They’re fifth in the Premier League form table, more solid, as you’d expect a Pulis team to be, but attractive in attack too, Saido Berahino the star turn, Brown Ideye restored and revived (though suspended for this one). City can’t afford to take West Brom lightly, especially when they’re feeling this fragile.
Kick off: 12.45pm.
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