Manchester City have signed one of the biggest names in women's football.
Rose Lavelle won the bronze ball award at the 2019 World Cup, scoring three goals during the tournament including the USA's second as they beat the Netherlands 2-0 in the final.
Her signing was announced by City today, but in amongst all the praise lurked the sweat-stained MAGA hat of Football Twitter that is the 'no-one cares' brigade.
These are the men who care so little about women's football that they take time out of their day to tweet about how little they care, and then argue with people about how little they care in the responses.
In order to be this confident about what people do and don't care about, you'd imagine these are people with massive platforms who can speak with authority when it comes to establishing what the internet wants to hear about.
In order to proclaim that 'no-one cares' about a deal involving Manchester City Women (127,031 followers) and World Cup winner Rose Lavelle (176,691 followers) without looking monumentally stupid, you'd have to be a major social media influencer. A shaper of trends. A moulder of thoughts.
If, on the other hand, you were just some wee guy spilling tangy cheese Dorito crumbs onto your keyboard while addressing your 193 followers, it might be worth sitting this one out.
I've given a small sample the benefit of the doubt and contrasted their Twitter followings with that of Lavelle's to double-check that their 'No-one cares' assertions are valid and not just grimly ironic.
Prepare to be in no way shocked.
"No one gives a f***" - @LongSeargent, 14 followers (0.008% of Lavelle's)
"Didn’t ask" - @GreenwoodUtd26, 193 followers (0.1%)
"Couldn’t care less" - @Tr3ntSzn_66, 1,619 followers (0.9%)
"Nobody cares" - @LFCNoah, 8 followers (0.005%)
"Women should be banned from football and from golf courses" - @patmck123, 211 followers (0.1%)
"Who?" - @macennnnn, 81 followers (0.05%)
"Who?" - @bigbosslenni, 152 followers (0.09%)
"F*** woman football" - @CrummyXBL, 13 followers (0.007%)
*Gif of someone yawning* - @kawhi_account, 803 followers (0.5%)
"Not a sport" - @ElReyMamon2, 29 followers (0.02%)
*Picture of Drake saying "I don't have a f*** to give"* - @gan5o, 7 followers (0.004%)
"No-one cares" - @UCLCHAMPION1920, 54 followers (0.03%)
"We don't care" - @Don_Daig, 750 followers (0.4%)
"Nobody cares" - @SirKimmich32, 130 followers (0.07%)
*Gif of Jurassic World star Chris Pratt saying "Who gives a f***********k?"* - @IvoVas, 30 followers (0.02%)
NEXT WEEK: @QAnonSwampDrainer (23 followers) on why 'Actually, no-one gives a f***' about Vice-Presidential candidate Kamala Harris (5,115,059 followers).
