The UK's bird flu "patient zero" has explained how the virus makes him feel, as he isolates at home.
Bird flu does not usually infect humans, but several cases of human infection with bird flu viruses have occurred since 1997.
Alan Gosling, 79, was identified on Thursday as having become infected with a particular strain of avian flu.
READ MORE: Woman forced to leave Liverpool club after humiliating incident in dress
The dad-of-three, from Devon, is believed to have caught the disease from ducks he had adopted.
He began to see some of his flock falling ill in late December - which resulted in all 160 being culled soon after.
Doctors then did tests to see if Alan himself had become infected despite the fact the H5N1 strain had never infected a human before and found he was positive.
The retired train driver is now stuck inside his home alone as he grieves his ducks, with his family growing increasingly concerned.
Alan today said he feels "absolutely fine, but very lonely."
He said: "As far as health is concerned, I'm fine, but I can't stop thinking about the ducks.
"I'm as fit and healthy now as I was donkeys years ago, because looking after the ducks kept me busy and active every day.
"By now, I would be back out with them, except I don't have any because they killed them all.
"I can't believe it. Some of them I had for 12, 13 years since they were tiny chicks and I hand-reared them.
"They all had different stories - and then I had to watch them being killed and I couldn't do anything to help them."
Alan said he now "doesn't now what to do" with himself.
He continued: "People thought I was mad when they heard me shouting them to come back in from the river, but that's how it's always been, until now.
"One of my other hobbies that I will try to get back into is restoring old clocks, but at the moment I can't focus on anything else because my ducks are all I can think about.
"I keep turning it over in my head and when I go to sleep it's what I dream about. Maybe one day I'd like some more ducks, or other birds, but it'll never replace what I lost."
Alan's daughter-in-law Ellesha Gosling, 26, said: "The past couple of weeks have been hell. Alan told us when the birds were killed, it was the 'worst moment of his life'.
"The culling of his beloved ducks has destroyed him - it's broken him. It has been so stressful and an absolute nightmare for us as a family.
"Both myself and my husband have had to take time off work to handle it.
"He has asked questions about his health and we can't answer any questions because we don't know any answers.
"He has told us he is not poorly, but he's really stubborn and we don't think he would tell us if he was. We are very worried.
"Not just because of the flu, but because those ducks were his closest family and he has just lost all of them at once and now he's stuck inside on his own."
On Thursday, the UK Health and Security Agency (HSA) confirmed a case in England, although did not name Alan.
Part of its statement said: "The person acquired the infection from very close, regular contact with a large number of infected birds, which they kept in and around their home over a prolonged period of time.
"The risk to the wider public from avian flu continues to be very low. However, people should not touch sick or dead birds."
The national outbreak of avian flu has led to other parks closing their duck ponds and enclosures in a bid to save their animals from the same fate as Alan’s.
Guidance on the NHS website says "plans are in place" to manage any suspected cases of bird flu.
It also advises people that they cannot become ill from eating fully cooked poultry or eggs, even in areas with an outbreak of bird flu.
Receive newsletters with the latest news, sport and what's on updates from the Liverpool ECHO by signing up here
