When has signing a petition ever got us anywhere?
The British parliament petitioned Charles I in 1628 and successfully gained his assent to their “Petition of Right” that “forbade the raising of gifts, loans, benevolences and taxes without parliamentary consent ... also arbitrary imprisonment, etc.”
Some 50 years later his successor Charles II, no doubt fed up with all such attempts “to encroach on the royal prerogative”, called these parliamentary upstarts “Petitioners” (later called Whigs), and their opponents, or the king’s supporters, “Abhorrers” (later called Tories).
Richard Orlando, Westmount, Quebec, Canada
• When the petition is to increase politician’s salaries.
David Brandt, Hervey Bay, Queensland, Australia
• In the short term, it might not get us far, but it helps draw attention to whatever cause we are a part of and opens the door for discourse, which is one of the first steps towards change.
R De Braganza, Kilifi, Kenya
• Probably on to one or more Secret Service watch lists. If one could find out it could be a badge of honour or disgrace depending on which list(s) one’s name was on.
Margaret Wyeth, Victoria, British Columbia, Canada
• Signing a petition will often not get us anywhere; not signing will definitely get us nowhere.
Hartmann Doerry, Tübingen, Germany
• It can sometimes create the illusion that, in the face of bureaucracy, we are not entirely powerless.
Lawrie Bradly, Surrey Hills, Victoria, Australia
• If the Google algorithms work well, you will have been clustered with like-minded folks with whom you can organise on the ground thereafter, ie if you are still mobile.
RM Fransson, Wheat Ridge, Colorado, US
• About as often as liking a Facebook entry?
John Benseman, Auckland, New Zealand
• Every time it takes us to a place of self-respect.
Charlie Bamforth, Davis, California, US
• Almost never. I suggest we circulate a petition that we have no more petitions.
David Isaacs, Sydney, Australia
Dandruff on a dinner jacket
Invent an equivalent to the French idiom, “falling like hair on soup”.
The request resembled “asking for steak in a vegan restaurant”.
Philip Stigger, Burnaby, British Columbia, Canada
• Deafening like butterflies dancing on clouds.
Jennifer Rathbone, Toronto, Canada
• Falling like dandruff on a dark dinner jacket.
Terence Rowell, Dartmouth, Nova Scotia, Canada
• You cannot invent better than Eric Cantona: “When the seagulls follow the trawler, they think sardines will be thrown in the sea”.
E Slack, L’Isle Jourdain, France
• I already have in my French-English glossary: J’arrive comme un cheveu sur la soupe – I’m clearly not welcome here.
Nicholas Albrecht, Paris, France
Surf for the best time zones
As we get older seem to sleep less well, often waking in the middle of the night. Why?
If you are male and awakening is accompanied by trips to the washroom, it’s time to check your prostate.
Anthony Walter, Surrey, British Columbia, Canada
• Because that is when the best international radio is on.
Lynne Owen, Sackville, New Brunswick, Canada
Any answers?
What was the first writing on the wall and what will be the last?
John Morralee, Belleville, Ontario, Canada
Which famous person would you like to have dinner with?
Peter Stone, Sydney, Australia
• Send answers and more questions to weekly.nandq@theguardian.com
