Love Island's Dr Alex George has opened up about the "horror" of his brother Llŷr's death.
The reality star was devastated when he broke the news his brother Llŷr took his own life aged 20 in July this year.
Now the A&E hero says he will never get over his younger sibling's death.
In an outpouring of grief, he shared his innermost thoughts with Frankie Bridge on a new episode of Open Mind podcast.
The emergency ward doctor admitted he was still in the "numb phase" now; the natural stage following the waves of horror, shock and a breakdown in the immediate weeks after the tragedy.
He said: "It’s been a tough few months, he passed on the 23rd of June so not that long ago. I’m probably still very much in a numb phase.
"I went through the horror, shock, breakdown in the first few weeks. It was out of the blue entirely. As an older brother, it’s tough to have a younger sibling do that. He had a place in medical school, he was due to start this year.
"I’ll never get over it, I think it will take me a long time to accept it. It was very much out of the blue. I think he was anxious about his exam results but we certainly didn’t think he felt like that."
It's been an incredibly difficult few months for the television star after his brother's death.
Early in July, the NHS doctor split up from his girlfriend Amelia Bath after they had been living apart due to him working on the frontline.
They had been romancing since December 2018 before ending their relationship earlier this year.
However, Dr Alex has extended his support to his fans at this difficult time during the coronavirus pandemic.
The reality star has been answering people's questions and anxieties during radio interviews and Instagram Q&As while he's not fighting on the frontline.
Recently, he announced he was going to be leaving his job at Lewisham's A&E department where he worked devotedly for five years.
Dr Alex has plans to train as a GP following his experience in the emergency department.
The TV star had overnight fame after starring on Love Island and doesn't go unrecognised by patients at work.
*If you're struggling and need to talk, the Samaritans operate a free helpline open 24/7 on 116 123. Alternatively, you can email jo@samaritans.org or visit their site to find your local branch
