It is a truth universally acknowledged that a single man in possession of a six pack must be in want of a match. In the case of Love Island, these matches are doomed.
Day 2 in the villa and it has become immediately clear that even the arrival of vocal fry made physical, Chloe, is not enough to pull the couples together. Instead, Chloe’s dramatic entrance acted as a catalyst for what can only be described as a feeding frenzy, each of the boys lining up to bemoan a lack of chemistry with their fellow Islanders.
This puts Chloe, a Valley Girl trapped in the body of a Financial Services Marketing Executive, in prime position. She may have already made headlines for revealing an affair with a married co-worker, but a call from HR is the last thing Chloe needs to worry about. The clock is ticking and a choice has to be made. As the girls proclaim a cool disinterest, it looks like Aaron, Jake and Brad are in pole position when it comes to catching this bombshell’s eye. Your honour, the evidence:
- No one has ever been that interested in someone having a degree from the University of Birmingham. Sorry, Aaron!
- By the very nature of Chloe being blonde, Jake is interested.
- In a lie so large it warrants an Ofcom investigation, Chloe referred to Brad as “eloquent”.
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For Liberty and Faye, this may prove stressful. Unbeknownst to Liberty, she has already gone to third base with Jake, an innocent “toe hug” during the night made more haunting considering the lingering spectre of The Foot Fetish, which given its prominence is now the twelfth islander. Faye meanwhile carries the energy of a woman who has never met a man who doesn’t want her. Though Brad’s chat is dead, even Faye knows that it would be reckless to let someone like him slip through her fingers, especially after that pool scene. One can only ask, has a body of chlorinated water ever been so lucky?
In comparison, Shannon is vying for the title of unbothered queen, having pied advances from every boy in the “horny devils” challenge. The jury is out as to whether Shannon is playing it cool or is just wholly unprepared to meet the demands of a show called Love Island.
As we await Chloe’s decision and a teased twist in the format, one couple could be about to blossom. Arguably one of the relaxed couples in the villa, Toby and Kaz have already locked lips twice in the villa and seemingly… have enjoyed it? After an episode lacking in the drama and sizzle we have come to expect, could this be the glowing embers of a budding fire? God knows we need it.
Love Island continues tonight at 9pm on ITV2.
