Dear Coleen
I’m a guy in my late 20s and a few weeks ago I got back in touch with a girl I dated at school when we were 17.
Things ended when we both went to university, and we hadn’t spoken to each other until recently when I saw she was connected to one of my Facebook friends and I sent her a message.
We’ve talked a lot and the conversations have been quite flirty, then last week we met up for a walk and I instantly fell in love with her all over again!
She’s currently single, although she did live with a partner a couple of years ago. It was so easy being in each other’s company and it’s obvious we just click.
I feel so strongly about her and I’m pretty sure she’s into me, too. I’m sure she’s the one.
I don’t want to risk losing her again – I’m convinced we’re meant for each other and that I’m madly in love.
My problem is, should I tell her how I feel or do you think it’s too soon – would it scare her off or would she respect me for being honest?
I’m not sure what to do for the best right now.
Coleen says
I don’t think you should get down on one knee just yet – you haven’t even had a proper date! You’ve only met up once for a walk.
I do think it would be wise to give it a bit of time before telling her you’re in love with her – for yourself as much as her.
You might be caught up in the thrill of connecting with her again, plus we’ve all been through a very isolating and strange time during the last year of lockdowns.
I’m not suggesting you shouldn’t tell her you really like her and want to see where things go, and I’m not saying your feelings aren’t genuine, but it would be good to get past that initial excitement to see if the relationship has legs.
So my advice would be to carry on dating in whatever way you can manage with the changing Covid restrictions, get to know each other again and just enjoy it.
I think it’ll be clear to you both if it’s going well and then you can move things up a gear.
I love your enthusiasm though, and hopefully you’ll discover she feels a lot for you, too.
