Even by increasingly extravagant gender reveal party standards, Laura Whitmore’s was quite something. The news that her forthcoming baby will be female was broken live on ITV, by nation’s sweetheart Lorraine Kelly. Oopsie!
Although, actually, not quite.
During an interview to promote psychologist… oh no, sorry, TV presenter Laura’s self-help book, No One Can Change Your Life Except For You, Lorraine asked if it included advice she’d want to pass on to her “baby girl.”
Laura looked surprised, hesitated for a second, and then replied, “Yeah, erm, well, to my baby.”
Social media went crazy, accusing Lorraine of spilling the beans without Laura’s permission, which was clearly an outrage. However, all was – not for the first time on social media – not as it first seemed. Lorraine later tweeted that she only mentioned the baby’s sex because Laura herself had announced it in the very book she was there to flog.
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“There’s a new chapter coming into my life, in the form of a baby girl currently growing inside me – and that scares the s**t out of me,” Laura writes.
Laura, Lorraine, and every person on the planet who has forced their family and friends to endure a gender reveal party are forgetting one thing.
No-one cares about the sex of the baby, except its parents. Maybe the grandparents too, at a stretch. But that’s very much it.
Anyone else who turns up to a party to look at a cake or some balloons that will either be pink or blue is only doing so because they didn’t think of an excuse to get out of it quickly enough.
Or, because they hope it will be entertaining, like all the famous ones online, where the couple have five daughters and are hoping for a son, and then have to smile through clenched teeth as they’re covered in pink confetti.
I think there’s a video where the confetti cannon backfires into the dad-to-be’s crotch – that one was worth attending. All the others, total snoozefests thrown by narcissists.
I don’t even understand why anyone would want to know the sex of their baby before it arrives anyway. The surprise, the anticipation, and the big reveal at the end was the only thing that kept me going through my long, miserable pregnancy.
Also much more fun to text everyone dramatically a Rebekah Vardy-style IT’S A……......... BOY!!!! When you know the sex, presumably you choose the name well in advance too, so what do those texts say? Oh, Kevin’s here, by the way.
All in all, this Whitmore/Kelly saga is the showbiz story that wasn’t. Someone didn’t accidentally reveal anything, because it had already been announced, and no-one cared anyway.
I suggest we all move on with our lives, which no-one can change except for us, remember.
