Well that was impressive. Sure, Watford were abysmal, but Liverpool were the finest cheese wire, slicing through their static opponents with ruthless efficiency. That’s them top of the Premier League for the first time since May 2014 - that was the Crystal Palace collapse in the title race, which did technically take them back top of the league. Makes you wonder why they were so upset afterwards, really.
Updated
Full-time: Liverpool 6-1 Watford
Peeeeeeeeeeeeep-peeeeeeeep-peeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep.
90 mins + 1: From the corner, Sturridge plays short, the ball finds its way to the kid Ejaria in the area, he plays a beautiful flick back to Sturridge. The England man has another shot, again it’s saved by Pantilimon, but Wijnaldum is there and has time to control it on the edge of the box before slotting home. That’s his first goal for Liverpool.
GOAL! Liverpool 6-1 Watford (Wijnaldum 90+1)
And there’s another.
Updated
90 mins: The home fans are singing Jurgen Klopp’s name, which he asked them not to do (before the game was won) the other week. They’re probably safe this time, mind.
Meanwhile, Sturridge has another shot from the right, but it’s saved by Pantilimon.
88 mins: My chuffing days, what a save. Sturridge lines a big one up from the edge of the area, to the right, it’s heading for the top corner(ish) and a flying Pantilimon gets a fingernail to it, thus taking the ball away from net and onto crossbar. Firmino’s follow-up is saved by Pantilimon. It’s weird, but Watford’s two goalkeepers today have let in five goals and haven’t done a massive amount wrong.
87 mins: And that’s yer lot for Coutinho - he’s off, and youngster Ovie Ejaria is on for his Premier League debut. For Watford, Pererya is replaced by Zuniga.
86 mins: And there’s another thing, and he should really have scored there. Or at least shot on target. Clyne made good tracks down the right, slid a pass inside from where Coutinho has a good look and takes a shot, but it flies well over.
84 mins: Coutinho does something wrong! Well, well, well. He flicks a pass slightly too long for Firmino, and Pantilimon claims.
81 mins: Henderson powers forwards, then smartly feeds Sturridge on the right side of the box. He cuts in and tries a guided left-footed shot, but that’s too close to Pantilimon. He might have played in Coutinho, free(ish) to his left, but at 5-1 you can’t really blame him for shooting there.
80 mins: Weird one. The free-kick from the right is boomed over to the back post, Wijnaldum heads it back into the area where Sturridge is, but he sort of turns his back on the ball as the looming figure of Pantilimon, erm, looms.
Updated
79 mins: Yellow card for Britos, after he clumsily/cynically barges Can over on the Liverpool right.
78 mins: Sturridge clangs one against the bar, after being fed on the left side of the area, he lets the ball drift across his body and thunks his shot onto the goal frame.
Updated
77 mins: Another chance for Watford, this time from Ighalo who finishes a counter off with a left-footed effort from the right, but that one was fairly easily saved by Karius.
75 mins: More lax defending, this time from Liverpool, as Janmaat is offered as much time as he felt comfortable with to pick his spot, and he selects the bottom corner of the net, guided home with his left foot.
GOAL! Liverpool 5-1 Watford (Janmaat 75)
See, there’s always a bit of grit in the stew with Liverpool.
Updated
74 mins: Great chance for Watford, as Deeney plays a smart reverse pass to Capoue, through on goal, but Karius dashes out, spreads himself and manages to keep the ball out...well, I think with his rump.
73 mins: There’s Henderson again, crossing from the right, but that’s headed clear with Firmino lurking.
71 mins: “Sorry Steven Hughes is wrong and Jim Morrish is right,” says TS Browning, who has almost certainly published three moderately successful volumes of poetry, with a name like that. “Hillary will win the election and then Trump will launch a coup with the help of the FBI and the NRA. Supreme Leader Trump will be safely in the Oval office by Wednesday. Don’t worry about it too much though because it won’t last long. I’m sure the asteroid will wipe us all out before 2017... But hey Liverpool are top so it’s not all bad.”
70 mins: And here’s Danny Sturridge - he dons his gloves and will have a 20-minute run-out in place of the excellent, quite excellent Adam Lallana.
Updated
69 mins: And another! Watford take a corner short on the right, it’s whipped in low to the near-post where Britos gets a touch, but Karius again gets down to his left smartly to push it clear.
68 mins: A chance for Watford, would you believe. A corner is cleared to the edge of the box, where Capoue lines up a shot, it arrows towards the corner but Karius dives nicely and pushes the ball away. Good shot, good save, good football everyone.
64 mins: On Liverpool’s choice of prematurely (although, as it turned out, correctly so) celebratory music Philip Podolsky writes: “One does wish football, as an institution, had a better taste in music... Hollywood, too.”
63 mins: “Regarding Can and Henderson linking up in the box,” writes Matt Loten, “isn’t that just the embodiment of Klopp-ball? Namely, that it’s a version of Total Football-lite, in that the front eight are completely interchangeable in their roles, whilst the two centre-halves stand around looking incompetent. Not that I’m complaining, mind you, this is the most thrilling, free-flowing football I’ve seen in the Premier League since, uh, Chelsea last night.”
62 mins: Sub for each team: Watford remove Behrami in favour of a stable door with a horse nowhere to be see...sorry, ‘Ben Watson’. And for Liverpool, Gini Wijdnaldum is on in place of Mane.
60 mins: Superb composure from Firmino, who looked in on the right but couldn’t quite create the space for a shot, so he checked back, waited for Mane to make his darting run into the middle and slid it into his colleague’s path. Again, a Liverpool forward slips betwixt two defenders and sidefoots home. Could be a (brackets) score, this.
GOAL! Liverpool 5-0 Watford (Mane 60)
Officially graduated to embarrassing territory for Watford now.
Updated
57 mins: Clinical stuff from Liverpool, but again helped out by a relaxed approach to defending from Watford. Lallana crosses low from the left, Firmino is there on the edge of the six-yard box, having wandered between two defenders, and he sidefoots home.
GOAL! Liverpool 4-0 Watford (Firmino 57)
All too easy.
Updated
56 mins: Ach, nasty one from Holebas who sticks some studs on Mane’s ankle. Not actually convinced it was 100% deliberate, more a hanging leg from a sliding challenge, but the yellow card is justified nonetheless.
55 mins: “What’s been so awful about this year Nick? Been a great one,” writes Elliot Wilson. Well I’m glad someone’s happy.
53 mins: Chance for Liverpool, as Henderson makes one of those now-rare runs into the box, he plays in Can (which does lead to the question: who’s minding shop in midfield?), the German doesn’t quite control it, the ball falls back to Henderson whose shot rises, rises, rises.
51 mins: Oooh, nice bit of football from Watford. Amrabat plays a nice ball into Ighalo in the area, he makes a nice lay-off to Janmaat coming in from the right, who shoots nicely, but Karius saves. Nice.
49 mins: “There’s still hope, Mr Morrish,” writes Mark Turner. “Trump doesn’t have Coutinho cutting in from the left wing on his team.”
48 mins: Coutinho lines up another blooter, but after creating a spot of space for the shot, he couldn’t quite get enough whip on it to threaten the goal.
47 mins: Incidentally, that Starship song featured in quite a sweet bit in quietly-decent film The Skeleton Twins.
46 mins: Anyway, we’re off for the second 45. No changes at half-time, apart from perhaps the tinnitus in some Watford defenders at the roasting Mazzarri presumably gave them at half-time.
If there’s one thing we can rely on, it’s Liverpool getting giddily ahead of themselves: they just played this over the PA...
I knew this was coming. But it probably needed to be said, by Steven Hughes, in response to Jim Morrish: “Pedantry corner: No, I think we can safely say that President Obama will be in the Oval Office until 20th January 2017 as there’s always that gap between someone winning the presidency and them being sworn in.
“When black-hearted disgraces take over in the UK, at least we’re thrown right into Dante’s inferno whereas Americans will have an awful 11 weeks or so of anticipation, dread and conducting a left-wing circular firing squad before the tiny-handed maniac even begins his rotting the USA out from the inside, if he wins on Tuesday.”
Jim Morrish has spotted four mangy-looking blokes on horses on the horizon: “Cubs win the World Series. All Blacks lose to Ireland. Liverpool top of the league.
“I think we can safely say President Trump will be in the Oval Office on Wednesday.”
Half-time: Liverpool 3-0 Watford
Peeeeeeeeeeeeep-peeeeeeeep-peeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep.
Quite the performance, that. Admittedly against bright white traffic cones for most of the time, but still.
Updated
45 mins +4: “We’re gonna win 4-3,” goes the customary chant from the away end.
45 mins + 2: Should be four - Lallana plays a delicious reverse pass to Can (again in acres), and his square ball across the six-yard box eludes everyone, Firmino being the closest Liverpool forward to the chance. But let’s give them that one, shall we?
45 mins: Free-kick on the left side of the box for Liverpool, and sneaky little Jimmy Milner tries to sneakily sneak a shot in at the near-post. But wily ol’ Pantillimon knew his game, and used every inch of his 11ft 15 frame to paw it away.
44 mins: Watford have a shot! Capoue fires in from outside the area, and Karius does well to keep hold of it, with Ighalo lurking, waiting to snaffle the rebound.
43 mins: Liverpool have been superb but that was embarrassingly easy for Liverpool: Lallana clips a cross to the far post, but Can had been allowed to amble in completely unmarked, and thus guides a header past Gomes with the utmost ease. Klopp almost slips over when celebrating.
GOAL! Liverpool 3-0 Watford (Can 43)
Liverpool are going top of the league.
Updated
42 mins: ....And that free-kick is punched clear by Karius, it drops to Amrabat but his volley is way off.
41 mins: Pererya flings himself to the turf after a mild 50-50 with Mane. Free-kick to Watford, out on the left touchline.
39 mins: A quieter period: by which I mean Liverpool haven’t had a shot for about five minutes. Point of note: Miles Jacobson, the brains behind Football Manager, is in the crowd, presumably as a guest of Watford.
37 mins: Calling it now: he’s decent.
As it stands (35 minutes gone) Coutinho has a goal or assist every 71 minutes for Liverpool this season.
— Andrew Beasley (@BassTunedToRed) November 6, 2016
35 mins: This is following a similar pattern to the West Brom game from a few weeks ago: Liverpool have been absolutely superb, scoring two goals when they could’ve had more. On that occasion they didn’t add to that brace, and were left with a twitchy last few minutes when their defence inevitably caved in. Thus, to make Scousers everywhere feel a little more relaxed, they’ll need another one or two at some stage.
34 mins: Again, the odd wobble in the Liverpool defence, as Capoue puts pressure on them. But they hold ‘firm’ this time.
32 mins: Bad to worse for Watford: Gomes, who had been keeping the score respectable, appears to have hurt himself in trying to prevent that goal. Could be a twisted ankle or similar, but he’s being helped off and Costel Pantillimon will come on.
Updated
30 mins: Liverpool’s front four really are sensational. They combine with incredible fluidity, passing along the 30-yard mark and it eventually finds Coutinho, who does one of those brilliant touches that’s a first and a second all in one, then he fires home from the edge of the box.
GOAL! Liverpool 2-0 Watford (Coutinho 30)
Well that was superb.
Updated
29 mins: As brilliant as Liverpool look going forwards, they’re still so ropey at the back their supporters are presumably never comfortable. A couple of individual mistakes almost give Deeney a chance to reply instantly, Karius finds himself out of his goal and only some typically smart work from Milner prevents serious trouble.
27 mins: The second-most inevitable thing behind Trump winning on Tuesday and capping this beastly year in the most apt way possible: Liverpool lead. Coutinho plays the corner short, then fizzes in a cross to the near-post that Mane nips in front of his marker to meet, and glances the header past a helpless Gomes.
GOAL! Liverpool 1-0 Watford (Mane 27)
Finally.
Updated
26 mins: Milner plays an excellent one-two with Can on the left of the box, he goes around Amrabat with some ease and only good work from Gomes, coming out, saves a goal.
25 mins: Another shot. That’s eight in about the last ten minutes from then, this time Mane from the edge of the area, but doesn’t get all of it and Gomes makes a relatively straightforward save.
24 mins: Watford create half a chance, a cross that eludes everyone from the right, but then normal service resumes. Lallana plays a beautifully-weighted pass through to Firmino, but for some reason he tries a shot with the outside of his right foot, and it screws wide.
22 mins: More nice Liverpool play and another chance, but this time less clear-cut. They sweep the ball from right to left, Coutinho eventually plays in Milner on the left side of the box, but his shot from a tricky angle was straight at Gomes.
20 mins: And again! My days, how are Liverpool not in the lead? Brilliant play from Liverpool, as a Mane pass finds Coutinho, whose phenomenal first touch takes at least one defender out of the game and provides space for a shot in the area, cutting in from the left, but he goes for the near post rather than the more open far, and it slides just wide.
18 mins: Coutinho hits the bar! A delightful ball from Firmino finds Coutinho on the edge of the six-yard box, but his effort crashes against the horizontal. He was offside, but he still should have put that home.
Updated
16 mins: A cross by Lallana looks for Mane at the far post, but Holebas just gets a foot to it and it loops out for a corner. From that corner, the ball falls to Lucas at the back stick, he has a brilliant chance to score but instead of slotting it to the space just left of Gomes, he hits it straight at his countryman. Gomes did stay big quite impressively, but that should be 1-0.
Updated
15 mins: Lucas steps up and provides some space for Deeney to chase a long ball, and although the striker takes an impressive first touch, he’s edged out by Milner and the attack fizzles.
14 mins: Mane trips Behrami on halfway. Neither team has done anything particularly special thus far, but Watford seem to have carried out their gameplan more effectively.
12 mins: ...which is swung over, Lucas got a glancing header to it but sends the ball just wide.
11 mins: Nasty-looking challenge from Amrabat on Coutinho, but one of those that wasn’t quite as malicious as it seemed. Both players were going for a ball about hip-height, both with their feet, and the Liverpool man just got there first and Amrabat’s studs go into his abdomen. Free kick to Liverpool, though...
9 mins: And perhaps to make Matip feel a little better about life, Younes Kaboul hoys a terrible backpass towards his own goal, Gomes can’t keep it out and that’s a corner. Luckily for Watford, the delivery is too deep and Firmino falls over somewhere in the vague direction of Behrami in an attempt to salvage something from the situation. No dice.
8 mins: Spicy pass back from Matip has Karius dancing like he’s on hot coals, having to concentrate on keeping the ball in rather than his ball out and, rather inevitably, he shanks a clearance out of play. From that throw, Amrabat tries a shot from about 20 yards out, but it’s straight at Karius who has a rather easier time dealing with it.
Updated
7 mins: First chance for Liverpool. Firmino returns a pass to Lallana out on the left, the cross is returned to the Brazilian who sidefoots a shot, but with no great pace or direction and Gomes saves.
6 mins: Game hasn’t really settled yet. Watford are pressing Liverpool very high, but that happens so much these days against teams who play out from the back, it’s hardly worth noting.
4 mins: Important point here, especially when compared with John Barnes’s in that earlier clip. Comfortably twice the material in the newer ones.
Troy Deeney's shorts are so big they need their own postcode.
— Richard Jolly (@RichJolly) November 6, 2016
3 mins: Audacious effort from Britos, somewhere near the halfway line, he tries to lob Karius. We know the jury might be out on the German keeper, but steady on...
1 min: And we’re away. At the second attempt, after kick-off is ordered to be retaken after some naughty encroaching.
The poppy, when laid down on its side, looks like one of those giant paella pans you get in Spanish markets. Here it is, in all its glory.
Updated
The teams are out, as is the biggest poppy outside the 30ft-tall one they have at Kings Cross station. This one looks like a mere six-footer, carried out onto the pitch by some military types.
Updated
It’s finished 1-1 in the North London derby, goals from Kevin Wimmer (an ogger) and Harry Kane (a penalty) squaring things at the Emirates. Re-live it all with Rob Smyth.
Watford’s defence today could be an adventure. As we now know it’s a back four, rather than Kabasele (who remains on the bench), but it’ll be interesting to see how they cope with Liverpool’s fizzing, buzzing front four. Here’s what Simon Burnton wrote in our big bumper bouncing weekend preview:
It took until mid-October for Watford to keep a clean sheet but having managed it for the first time at Middlesbrough three weeks ago they repeated the feat in their next two games, and, excluding stoppage time, Heurelho Gomes is but 120 seconds away from going 300minutes unbeaten. Away from home, only Arsenal and Tottenham have better defensive records. It is an impressive achievement, particularly given that of the four players who regularly contest the three central defensive positions in Walter Mazzarri’s preferred formation only one – Younès Kaboul, a summer arrival from Sunderland for around £3.5m – was signed for a fee, and Gomes was also a free transfer. But the mountainous Austrian centre-half Sebastian Prödl limped out of last week’s victory over Hull, apparently with a muscle injury, and with Craig Cathcart also injured it is likely only two of the four will be available for this, their sternest test of the season so far.
Whether Mazzarri’s response will be to bring in Christian Kabasele, the Belgium international who has played eight first-team minutes since August, or to move to a back four, a defence unchanged throughout their recent solid streak will be fundamentally altered. They face a team who have scored two or more goals in eight of their last nine games and have shown the ability to make even the most secure rearguards become bedraggled. There is, in short, plenty of encouragement for Liverpool, whose only obvious cause of concern would come if Nordin Amrabat, the Moroccan winger who made Hull’s stand-in left-back Sam Clucas appear utterly wretched at Vicarage Road last week, manages to repeat the trick against James Milner, another player unaccustomed to that position, who is expected to return after missing the 4-2 win at Crystal Palace.
This week Paul Wilson spoke to Emre Can, and via having the news broken to him that he wasn’t in the German squad (bit awkward), the midfielder confirmed that he is not Steven Gerrard.
It is very nice to be compared to Steven Gerrard but I know I am not at the same level,” Can says with refreshing candour. “There is a long way to go there. I am trying to score more goals for a start. It is something I want to do. Last weekend I scored my first goal of the season but I had chances against Manchester United and West Brom and didn’t take them. My target is to score more goals, not necessarily be the next Steven Gerrard. Obviously my respect for him is very high but I want to go my own way. I want to be Emre Can, not copy other players.”
Team news
So no surprises from Liverpool, the only changes from last weekend being James Milner and Lucas back in defence, for Moreno and Dejan Lovren, the latter of whom has a virus. For Watford, Daryl Janmaat replaces Sebastian Prodl, and one assumes that means a back four. Another thing to note is that Jerome Sinclair, purchased from Liverpool in the summer, is on the bench, so could in theory make his Watford debut.
Liverpool
Karius; Clyne, Lucas, Matip, Milner; Can, Henderson; Lallana, Mane, Coutinho; Firmino. Subs: Wijnaldum, Sturridge, Klavan, Moreno, Mignolet, Origi, Oviemuno Ejaria.
Watford
Gomes; Janmaat, Kaboul, Britos, Holebas; Amrabat, Behrami, Capoue; Pereyra, Ighalo, Deeney. Subs: Mariappa, Guedioura, Zuniga, Sinclair, Watson, Kabasele, Pantilimon.
Referee: Michael Oliver (Northumberland)
Preamble
Narrative. Modern football loves narrative. There’s plenty of it around, stories around which the actual playing of the game must be framed. It’s not enough simply to enjoy watching a match, but to understand the tales around it too. And to an extent that’s understandable: without ‘narrative’, the North London derby from earlier would just be two teams who didn’t have to travel very far on a Sunday lunchtime. But sometimes it does seem like it can get in the way of what we’re all actually here for.
This game, though. This game seems to be absolutely free of narrative. The only mutual player is Jerome Sinclair, who played but 25 minutes of league football for Liverpool, in two dead games the season before last, and is yet to appear for Watford. The two managers have never faced each other. There have been no particularly controversial recent meetings between the two sides, unless you count Adam Bogdan flinging one into his own net as Liverpool’s last goalkeeping resort last season. There was the time Tommy Mooney scored a winner for Watford at Anfield back in 1999, but only the dorkiest of narrative completists would place much significance on that.
What else have we got? Well, both sides can be delighted that the very epitome of footballing grace and delicacy John Barnes is a significant place in their respective histories, and perhaps we can all just take a moment to enjoy the great man, before we continue.
Good god, that goal against QPR. It’s worth reading Gregg Bakowski’s paean to Barnes from a few years ago, in which he discusses that strike.
Unshackled, his confidence and talent grew. His ability to beat players without appearing to change gear was a gift that only a select few players have ever been able to showcase. And for three years at Liverpool he did so effortlessly. His second goal in the 4-0 defeat of the league leaders QPR in October 1987 was a perfect example. After stealing the ball on the halfway line he picked up pace as he approached the penalty box, with Terry Fenwick and Paul Parker closing, he seamlessly shifted his hulking frame left and right to create a gap between them, before calmly emerging unscathed to slip the ball past David Seaman’s outstretched left hand. “Whenever would-be tacklers came sliding in, I tried to toe the ball past them, ride the challenge and regain balance and the ball on the other side. After I pushed the ball past Fenwick, I landed and brought the ball back with my left foot in one movement. It was difficult to see why I didn’t fall over,” explained Barnes in his autobiography, making the sublime seem simple.
What a player. But anyway. We’ve got a bit distracted from the business at hand. Which is football, to enjoy without distractions. The point is that this is one of the few games - particularly one of the few involving Liverpool - that we can enjoy without bothering ourselves with peripherals. This is pure football. Football for football’s sake.
But let’s just watch that John Barnes compilation again.
Kick-off: 2.15pm GMT
Nick will be here soon.
