Full time: Liverpool 2-0 Tottenham Hotspur
Peep peep! Liverpool end their poor run of form with an emphatic victory. Spurs were abysmal but that shouldn’t detract from a storming start to the match from Liverpool. Sadio Mane scored twice in three minutes to give them a lead they never looked like losing. They were absolutely superb in that first half an hour. Thanks for your company, see you in court.
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90+2 min Mane is brought off so that he can get a deserved ovation, and a big sloppy hug from Jurgen Klopp. Trent Alexander-Arnold replaces him. Mane was electric in the first half and settled the match.
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90 min Walker accidentally drags his studs across the head of Lallana. He’s fine. Four minutes of added time.
88 min Lloris comes miles out of his area and is in no man’s land when Wijnaldum tries to lob him from 50 yards. He makes a mess of that but then Davies and Lloris almost contrive to score an own-goal between them.
86 min Tottenham have had a really bad night. Their defeat confirms - if it was in any doubt - that Chelsea are the champions.
83 min Alderweireld ends a thrilling Liverpool counter-attack with a deliberate and necessary foul on Firmino just outside the box. He’s booked.
82 min Lucas has pulled something and leaves the field to be replaced by Klavan. Spurs bring on Janssen for Son.
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80 min The second half has been a non-event.
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78 min Dier is booked for a foul on Can, the seventh yellow card of the match.
77 min Another change for Spurs: Moussa for Moussa, Sissoko for Dembele. And Liverpool bring on Emre Can for Coutinho.
74 min After a good Liverpool break, Coutinho drives a low shot just wide from inside the D.
71 min The resulting free-kick, swung in beautifully by Milner, finds Matip eight yards out - but he mistimes his attempted header and it loops off his shoulder into the arms of Lloris.
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71 min Told you there would be yellow cards. Winks is the latest to be booked for a sliding tackle on Milner. He did pull out but by then Milner had leapt out of the way and that was enough for the referee to book him.
70 min “Leaping barge from Milner there,” says Anthony Cook. Nah, it was more of an elbow from the top rope.
69 min “Can you tell your correspondent (58 mins) that the reason Klopp picks Lallana is that he happens to be one of the few outfielders who prefers using his left foot,” says Graeme Thorn. “ Seriously, the back foot are all right-footers, the forward line is all right-footers, which leaves Henderson (right-footed), Wijnaldum (I’m not sure) and Lallana, who can use both but prefers his left.”
68 min Milner is booked for a flying shoulder barge on Kane.
68 min A change for Spurs: Harry Winks replaces the unusually ineffective Christian Eriksen.
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66 min The game is going nowhere at the moment. Liverpool lack the pizazz of the first half but they have done their attacking work. Spurs have offered nothing except a hint of aggro. Talking of which, Kane is booked for a filthy lunge at Clyne.
64 min If it stays like this there will be two points separating Spurs in second and Manchester United in sixth. Chelsea have ruined one of the great title races, the swines.
63 min In terms of their long-term development, this is becoming a worry for Spurs. There is so much to love about them but their performances today and at both Manchester clubs have been weirdly poor.
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61 min Alli brazenly shoves Mane over from behind. He’s looking for trouble at the moment.
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60 min “wasnt (sic) a filthy (sic) hack from Matip, a mistimed lunge more like,” writes my personal sub-editor Anthony Cook.
59 min Eriksen is penalised for a foul throw. Lads, it’s Tottenham.
58 min “Klopp knows more about footy than I do,” says Mark Turner. “Klopp keeps picking Lallana in the starting eleven. I have a lot of trouble reconciling those two facts.”
57 min Liverpool have dropped off a bit, both tactically and physically, which will give Spurs a smidgen of hope. It’s about all they deserve for their performance so far.
56 min: DISALLOWED GOAL Eriksen’s free-kick is steered onto the post by the offside Kane, with Dier scoring from the follow-up. There are no complaints and replays show it was the right decision.
56 min Matip is booked for a filthy hack at Eriksen.
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54 min After giving another free-kick, Anthony Taylor exhales with the weary look of a man who knows he’ll be showing a few yellow cards this half.
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52 min Henderson is booked for a foul on Alli which prompts a bit of a shoving match between Wanyama and Lallana.
50 min It’s been an excellent start to the half from Liverpool. Alli is getting frustrated and is lucky to get away with a clear shove on Firmino.
47 min “I don’t want to over-simplify That January, there are always plenty of factors,” says Matt Dony. “But, my word Liverpool missed Mane.”
46 min Peep peep! Spurs begin the second half, kicking from right to left. The main thing that will give them hope is that they were equally bad and 2-0 down at Manchester City before drawing that match.
“The Barry Horne 1994 stuff is all in my head, Rob,” says Gary Naylor, “as fresh as the day he decided to have a go, and the shot hit the back of the net - otherwise I think it would have hit me right in the coupon. Literally, unforgettable stuff.”
That’s so true. We’ve become a society that confuses memory and posterity, but there are some the camera will never capture.
Half-time chit-chat
“This is the worst first half from Spurs I can remember since Poch took over,” says Alistair Donegan. “Ben Davies’ performance is turning my hangover up from a 7 to a 9. Mcmanaman’s inane crowing just nudged it to 9.5.”
“I’m happy with the reaction from Liverpool in this match,” says Joseph Talbot, “but why is it five weeks late?”
A little thing called the human condition. (And the Africa Cup of Nations.)
Half time: Liverpool 2-0 Spurs (Mane 2)
The scoreline flatters one team but it’s not Liverpool. They were exhilarating, Spurs were Dierbolical. See you in 10 minutes for the second half.
43 min “You may wish to pawn your “Saves Galore 1988-89”,” says Gary Naylor, “but I’m keeping my highlights video of Everton’s 1993-94 season, “100 Golden Throw-ins” and the souvenir DVD of our 2005-6 Champions League campaign, “Two Nights in August”.”
Do you keep that 1994 classic Barry Horne Porn in an unmarked video case?
42 min Coutinho swings a corner in from the right. Dier is having a cup of coffee at the far post and Lucas gets above him to head over the bar. He migt have done better.
40 min Spurs look much better going forward now, but Liverpool look like creating a chance with every attack. It’s been a weirdly open half.
37 min Build your income daily! Earning money online has never been faster or easier! Email rob.smyth@theguardian.com.
36 min Liverpool did something interesting on that Spurs free-kick. Coutinho was down on one knee with his body spread to stop Eriksen driving it under the wall. Very cute.
35 min “Hi Rob,” says Peter Oh. “It looks as if Klopp’s pre-match pep talk was a simple: ‘Jungs, es ist Tottenham’.”
34 min Son is fouled right outside the area by Milner. The free-kick is just to the right of centre, perfect for Eriksen to whip it to the far corner. That’s exactly what he does and it flies onto the roof of the net. Mignolet had it covered.
33 min “Hi Rob,” says Peter Oh. “It looks as if Klopp’s pre-match pep talk was a simple: ‘Jungs, es ist Tottenham’.”
32 min Coutinho’s low shot from 12 yards is saved to his right by Lloris. Spurs’ defending has been appalling.
31 min Lloris is lucky when his attempted clearance hits Firmino and rebounds safely.
29 min Davies is having a stinker. He misjudges a pass towards the right, which allows Mane to collect it on the run and move into the area. Dier slides across to make what was probably a goal-saving challenge.
27 min Son is booked for an cynical attempt to stop a Liverpool counter-attack. He tried to kick him in the chest, basically. Luckily for him Firmino just ignored the challenge, which might have been the difference between a yellow card and a red.
26 min Spurs have woken up at last. Alli’s looping header, which might have been sneaking in, is headed over his own bar by Lucas.
25 min The chances keep coming. This time it’s for Spurs. Davies’s brilliant sliderule beats the stretching Matip and puts Son through on goal. He takes his time and then batters a low shot that is saved by the legs of Mignolet. He should have scored.
23 min Mane 2-2 Lloris. This is a brilliant individual contest. Mane picked up the ball on the right of the box and screamed a rising drive towards the near top corner. It might have been hitting the outside of the post, but Lloris took no chances with a flying reaction save.
22 min Mane almost gets a six-minute hat-trick! Walker played a diabolical pass back towards his own goal from just inside the Liverpool half. Mane scorched past the half-asleep Davies to collect the ball before shooting low towards goal, and only a fine save from Lloris denied him.
22 min “Wait, hang on,” says Niall Mullen. “Let me look at the table again.”
20 min As wonderful as Spurs are, they haven’t turned up in some big away games this season: City, United and, so far, Liverpool.
That was a dreadful goal for Spurs to concede. Dier dithered 35 yards from goal and was robbed by Mane. He ran into the area on the left and squared it for Lallana, whose rising shot was beaten away by Lloris. Firmino’s follow-up was also blocked by Lloris, but the ball rebounded behind him for Mane to twist his body and smash it past the two defenders on the line.
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GOAL! Liverpool 2-0 Spurs (Mane 18)
Two in three minutes for Sadio Mane!
It was a lovely goal. After Coutinho robbed Wanyama in midfield, Wijnaldum played a fine through pass to find Mane, who left Davies behind with a superb angled run from the right. He moved into the box, took his time and lifted the ball high into the net.
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GOAL! Liverpool 1-0 Spurs (Mane 16)
Liverpool deserve to be ahead, and now they are!
13 min A brilliant counter-attack with Liverpool - we’ve seen that before in this fixture - ends with a scramble in the penalty area and a sidefooted shot from Coutinho that is crucially blocked by Alderweireld.
12 min “Nice work, Melania Trump, trying to monetize your position, with the selling of shirts,” writes Sam Bailey. “For shame! It’s a crass cheapening of the mbm seat. You are history’s greatest monster. Harrumph harrumph &c &c. Hon Rev Barnaby L. Philsputtle.”
If you were on Journalism 2017 rates, you’d be doing the same. Next week I’ll be pawning my football VHS collection, starting with Saves Galore 1988-89.
11 min Alli nutmegs Henderson during a hitherto rare Spurs attack. It starts a nice move, all across the field, that ends with Eriksen slicing an awkward bouncing ball miles over the bar from just inside the box.
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8 min “There’s only one thing I want as a Liverpool fan,” says Niall Mullen. “That thing we last had when I was 13. Given that the chances of it happening this season are between slim & none, and slim is my codeword for none, then I really don’t care who wins this game. I only hope that there’s some learning to be had to make that thing happen before I retire (die).”
I really thought it’d happen this season. Thing is, think how much better they will be when they start next season with a defence and a goalkeeper. Unless the impatient entitlement of modern football manifests itself in the form of P45, I think they’ll win it under Klopp. It took him a few years to create that brilliant Dortmund team, and he is well on the way with Liverpool.
7 min Liverpool win a corner on the right. Davies at the near post shanks it behind for another corner, which is taken short and ballsed up.
6 min Exclusive Fanzone footage from tonight’s match.
5 min This has been a good start from Liverpool, with some lively play and one beautiful disguised pass from Coutinho that almost put Milner clear. They look right on their game so far.
3 min This new camera angle at Anfield. It’s crap, isn’t it? Won’t somebody think of the couch potatoes when they redesign grounds?
2 min Kane wins an early corner for Spurs. Davies’s inswinger is claimed comfortably by Mignolet. That’s silenced his critics!
1 min It’s a damp, cold night in Liverpool, fresh rain pelting onto the shimmering bald head of referee Anthony Taylor. He blows his whistle to begin the match, and Liverpool kick off from right to left.
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“Hey Rob,” writes the Kevin Smith. “I get that Sakho is now out on loan, but I simply cannot understand how the issues around him have got to this point. How is it better to send him out on loan and play Lucas at centre-back? Sakho-Matip seemed like it would be an excellent partnership, and yet it rather looks like they will never play together, for reasons that don’t seem to necessitate shooting oneself in the foot in this manner. Also, the weather in Ottawa this afternoon is grey like England’s stereotype, but around -15, so I could really use a Liverpool win today...”
It’s all me me me. What about that little 112-year-old lady who heads up the Dzalinda branch of the Tottenham Fan Club? Don’t you think she could use a win?
You doubtless know this afternoon’s scores. But if you want to read all about them, you can get some freshly baked match reports here.
Reasons to love Jurgen Klopp, part 92134123402194234
That BetVictor advert
This thoroughly mature reaction to a perceived crisis.
Team news
Liverpool (4-3-3) Mignolet; Clyne, Matip, Lucas, Milner; Lallana, Henderson, Wijnaldum; Mane, Firmino, Coutinho.
Substitutes: Karius, Moreno, Klavan, Can, Alexander-Arnold, Origi, Sturridge.
Tottenham Hotspur (4-2-3-1) Lloris; Walker, Alderweireld, Dier, Davies; Wanyama, Dembele; Eriksen, Alli, Son; Kane.
Substitutes: Vorm, Trippier, Wimmer, Winks, Sissoko, Nkoudou, Janssen.
Referee Anthony Taylor.
Preamble
Hello. The world is over, the title race is over and skinny jeans are over. But at Guardian Towers we like to accentuate the positive, so how about this race for fourth place? The fight between five sides for three Champions League sport has been defined by a splendid, old-fashioned unpredictability. At one time or another all five teams have been on long unbeaten or winning runs; all have also been in possession of the Premier League Crisis Baton™.
There are 120 possible permutations of those five clubs for the final 2016-17 league table, all equally credible. It’s a game of snakes and ladders. Liverpool, who were second a month ago, have slipped to sixth after Manchester United’s win over Watford. Spurs, fifth at the turn of the year, sit in second.
They are playing beautifully, Liverpool are playing abysmally. In this of all seasons, a Liverpool win is surely on the cards.
Kick off is at 5.30pm.
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