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Chicago Sun-Times
Chicago Sun-Times
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Laura Washington

Listen to the Fat Nag and drop that cookie

Sean Gallup/Getty Images

Whether you celebrate Christmas, Hanukkah or Kwanzaa, the holiday season is in full swing. “Auld Lang Syne” is in the air.

In the season to be jolly, we get fat. Whatever and wherever we celebrate, we are chomping and imbibing. The culinary temptations are ubiquitous at dinners, parties, receptions, on the slopes and at the beach.

As you reach for that extra slice of glazed ham, dig into Mama’s mac-and-cheese and sip the spiked eggnog, heed a loving warning from yours truly, The Fat Nag.

My loyal readers know that every now and then, I am compelled to bug, wheedle and beg you to get the fat out.

In 2015, nearly 4 million people worldwide died from diseases related to weight, according to a 2017 study published in the New England Journal of Medicine. Sixty percent of those people were considered obese. The rest were merely overweight.

The condition is tied to heart disease, diabetes, some cancers and other maladies that can lead to death.

The Fat Nag is here to tell you: The holidays could kill us.

A British academic study surveyed “multiple studies of average weight gains during each holiday season,” MarketWatch reported early this year. Researchers found consistent increases in weight, of roughly one or two pounds that we put on between Thanksgiving and New Year.

It’s a slippery slope.

The researchers, from the University of Birmingham and Loughborough University, found that while annual holiday weight gains can be small, “over 10 years they would lead to a 5 to 10 kg [roughly 10 to 20 pounds] increase in body weight, which is sufficient to drive the obesity epidemic.”

I know. You don’t want to hear it. It’s the holidays.

The Nag understands. She’s already put on five dreaded pounds this year.

Dear readers, party on. My holiday gift to you is ways to enjoy the fun and avoid the fat. So:

Eat a meal before you head out to the festivities. If you’re full, you won’t feast.

Choose a small plate at the buffet table. Load it with a healthy selection of fruits and green stuff. Then you’ll have less room when you head back for the cheese balls and sugar cookies.

Socialize far away from the kitchen, or from wherever the goodies are lurking. You’ll be less likely to graze.

Can you chew gum and party at the same time? Pop a gum or mint. The sugarless kind occupies the palate and keeps other edibles away.

If the party is potluck, bring a fruit or vegetable dish. Sharing is caring.

Dance. As the late, great James Brown would command, “Get up Offa That Thing!” Do some stepping and waltzing. Or help with the dishes. It will keep you away from the dessert table and earn you brownie points with your host or hostess.

Leave the leftovers behind. No doggie bags permitted. You know they’re not for Fido.

The Fat Nag sends a healthy and happy Season’s Greetings to you and yours. And hopes that Santa doesn’t get stuck in your chimney.

Send letters to: letters@suntimes.com.

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