On Sept. 15, 2024, Ryan Routh set out to alter the course of world history. He packed his rifle, gathered ammunition, and headed to the Trump International Golf Club in West Palm Beach. There he hid in shrubbery, unpacked his rifle, and aimed it through the fence. His target: Donald Trump.
Trump was moving between holes five and six of the course as Routh steadied his rifle, waiting for the perfect shot. Then gunfire rang out across the course. But not from Routh’s rifle. A Secret Service agent had spotted the would-be assassin and fired several shots in his direction. Routh fled in a vehicle, but was arrested soon afterward.
He was promptly charged with attempted assassination of a presidential candidate, assaulting a federal officer, and possessing a firearm in furtherance of a crime of violence, with a further charge of attempted felony murder added as the traffic closure he caused resulted in an accident that injured a six-year-old girl.
…let them fight
Routh has been imprisoned in the Miami Federal Detention Center ever since, raising eyebrows with a successful request to represent himself at trial. Now, in a peek at what might be coming when that happens, he’s posted an impressively nutso motion demanding trial-by-combat against Trump:
Ryan Routh just filed an unhinged motion, in which he challenges Trump to a fight. "Give me shackles and cuffs and let the old fat man give it his worst."
— Ken Silva (@JD_Cashless) September 2, 2025
Then he asks for strippers before challenging Trump to golf. "He wins he can execute me. I win I get his job." pic.twitter.com/kymSjPtrcd
“I think a beatdown session would be more fun and entertaining for everyone; give me shackles and cuffs and let the old fat man give it his worst.”
And, if Trump isn’t down for that, Routh also challenges him to a round of golf to settle the matter, with the job of president on the line! He requests a putting green for his cell, then requests:
“A round of golf with the racist pig, he wins he can execute me, I win I get his job. (sorry hillbilly Vance)”
A tempting offer, and doubtless excellent entertainment if it were to actually take place. Sure, Routh might be a clearly loopy would-be assassin who seems determined to be punished as hard as he can, but even so, he may yet prove to be a more competent president than that “dumbass” we have in the Oval Office.
Sadly, there’s not a snowball’s chance in hell that this showdown would ever occur, but if it did, imagine the ratings! And, Mr President, this guy ruined that day of golf! Surely it’s time for some payback, Trump style!
