So there you go. Interesting old evening, without being massively enthralling. Be interesting to see how Mourinho distracts attention from United’s dire performance, anyway.
Thanks for reading, and we shall meet again soon, no doubt.
A few minutes left in Manchester United v Everton. Follow that in detail over here.
Championship full-times
- Aston Villa 1-0 QPR
- Brentford 2-0 Leeds
- Derby 4-2 Fulham
- Ipswich 3-0 Wigan
- Preston North End 5-0 Bristol City
- Rotherham 0-2 Sheffield Wednesday
- Wolves 1-0 Nottingham Forest
Full-time: Watford 2-0 West Brom
Despite going down to ten men after Britos was dismissed, Watford hang on for the points, and they’re up to 10th.
Updated
Full-time: Burnley 1-0 Stoke
Of course the scoreline is a mere detail after Adam’s Iago Aspas tribute...
Oh Charlie, mate. pic.twitter.com/QQF2Gg94Dd
— Mundial Magazine (@MundialMag) April 4, 2017
Man alive...
9hrs 45 minutes since Sunderland scored in league. 1 win in 13. Going down. David Moyes being "fully supported" by club. #safc
— Simon Bird (@SimonBird_) April 4, 2017
A bit of hope for Blackburn, who pull one back against Reading through Elliott Bennett...but that hope is almost instantly extinguished as Garath McCleary puts one into the corner to make it 3-1.
Full-time: Leicester 2-0 Sunderland
David Moyes is going down. Oh well.
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That’ll be that for Ipswich against Wigan - Freddie Sears grabs his second to make it 3-0 to Mick McCarthy’s boys.
Down at the Amex, Che Adams has a consolation for Birmingham - it’s 3-1 to Brighton there.
GOA....no! Disallowed! Zlatan Ibrahimovic heads through Joel Robles and over the line, but the linesman raises his flag. Replays suggest it was the most marginal of marginals. Still, at least there’s Jose’s deflection excuse lined up for after the game.
Consolation for Fulham at Derby - Ayite gets his second of the game to make it 4-2.
Luke Shaw is on for Manchester United. The old ‘slag them off repeatedly in public, keep ‘em keen’ policy from Jose, there.
GOAL! Leicester City 2-0 Sunderland (Vardy 78)
And that will be that, as Vardy absolutely leathers one into the roof of the net. Five victories on the spin for Craig Shakespeare now.
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Leicester knocking on the door for anoth...but Sunderland hit the post! Victor Anichebe digs one out of his feet and hits the upright, the ball breaks to Defoe but he can only launch the ball into the side-netting.
"Slapped in the morning," sing Leicester City fans to David Moyes. Which is pretty strong punnery.
— Daniel Storey (@danielstorey85) April 4, 2017
Some sprinkles added to a couple of cakes in the Championship: Johnny Russell makes it Derby 4-1 Fulham, while Callum Robinson nets and it’s now Preston 5-0 Bristol City.
Red card!
Watford might be 2-0 ahead, but they’re one man down: a second booking for Miguel Britos sees him given his marching orders, although it looked a little harsh.
GOAL! Leicester City 1-0 Sunderland (Slimani 69)
The week gets worse for David Moyes: first he commits an act of loutish sexism, and now his team are losing. Well, losing again. Marc Albrighton swings a right-footed cross over from the left, picking out Slimani who glances a header home.
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Would you look at Preston: Callum Robinson taps home to make it 4-0 to them over Bristol City. All the teams in danger of relegation losing in the Championship.
Goal for Wolves at Molineux, as Wolves counter-attack and Nouha Dicko taps home to give them a 1-0 lead over Nottingham Forest.
Three for Derby, and three for David Nugent, who bags the matchball after he chases down the ball when clean through, his touch is heavy and it runs through to Button, but he charges down the clearance and eventually runs the ball into the net. Derby 3-1 Fulham.
Another for Brighton - a slightly fortunate goal from Hunemeier, his shot deflected heavily into the net, but little lucky about them in general. They’re top of the table, while Birmingham slip, slip, slip further down the table.
GOAL! Burnley 1-0 Stoke (Boyd 58)
Lovely goal from Burnley, as Hendrick drives from deep and slips the pass to Boyd about 12 yards out, and he sweeps a neat finish home.
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Watch Stoke for a while and you get used to Arnautovic’s ‘disappointed face’: he pulls it again there as he directs a slightly tricky header wide.
Preston sashaying towards a win now, as Tom Clarke heads home to make it 3-0 against Bristol City.
Brighton double their lead against Birmingham, with Tomer Hemed nodding in to put them 2-0 ahead, and on their way to the top of the Championship.
GOAL! Watford 2-0 West Brom (Deeney 48)
Yes n’ Deeney! Doesn’t work, really. But Watford are twice as far ahead as they were a few moments ago as he bags his 100th league goal for the club.
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A shot from Sunderland! After a fashion, as Schmeichel saves a comparatively weak effort from Borini.
Another goal at Deepdale, as Aiden McGeady sticks a penalty home to make it Preston 2-0 Bristol City. As things stand Preston will be just five points off the playoffs...
Absolutely magnificent bit of slapstick at Turf Moor: Charlie Adam goes to take a corner, slips over and as he fell to the floor he handled the ball. Free-kick, everyone laughs, Adam looks even more like an angry ham.
Half-time: Manchester United 0-1 Everton
Geez.
Half-time: Watford 1-0 West Brom
Watford ahead, and possibly should have been a man better off too, with James McClean potentially lucky to stay on the pitch after kicking out at Jose Holebas.
Phil Jagielka now has as many PL goals as Zlatan Ibrahimovic and Carlton Palmer.
— Duncan Alexander (@oilysailor) April 4, 2017
Half-time: Leicester 0-0 Sunderland
A bit less zzzzzzzzz, but still....zzzzzzzzzz.
Half-time: Burnley 0-0 Stoke City
Zzzzzzzzzzz.
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Another for Sheffield Wednesday, and another for Steven Fletcher. 2-0 against Rotherham, who are receiving a firm shoeing while they lie on the relegated floor.
Brilliant save at the King Power, as Gray cuts in from the left, he fires in a brilliant right-footed shot from just outside the area, and Pickford flings himself to his left and tips it round the post.
Lively minute or so at Derby: the home side win a penalty, taken by Nugent but saved by Button, and then from the resultant corner the ball falls back to Nugent, and he hooks a brilliant overhead into the corner of the net.
Equaliser for Fulham against Derby, as Floyd Ayite fires home from the edge of the box. 1-1 there at the Ipro.
A bit of action at Leicester, and it’s a reassuring beacon of light in an increasingly dark and uncertain world: Lee Cattermole has been booked for what we’ll call a ‘spicy’ challenge.
GOAL! Manchester United 0-1 Everton (Jagielka 22)
Oh Jose. Details here.
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Leicester v Sunderland has been an absolute barnburner so far.
First-half update. pic.twitter.com/peuRU0c457
— James Sharpe (@TheSharpeEnd) April 4, 2017
Brentford are now 2-0 ahead, the wonderfully named Lasse Vibe stabbing in a rebound to leave Gary Monk’s Leeds in some degree of woe.
Close to a goal at Old Trafford - Jacob Steinberg should have yer details here.
Reading are 1-0 up over Blackburn in the Championship, a classic Yann Kermorgant - who announced this week that he’ll retire at the end of next season - header doing the trick for them there. Meanwhile Ipswich are now 2-0 ahead against Wigan, Freddie Sears doing the necessary there.
Grim fare at Burnley v Stoke thus far, which you might say is predictable. A Stoke counter-attack when Berahino fed Arnautovic, but his touch was horribly heavy and it went through to keeper Tom Heaton.
GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLL at Deepdale. Tom Barkhuizen has stuck the ball in the net for Preston, putting them ahead against Bristol City.
Ipswich - on the sort of possible fringes of the edge of relegation trouble - are 1-0 up against Wigan, David McGoldrick sweeping home from just inside the area. If Wigan lose this one then they’re probably done, if they’re not already done.
More Champo goals: Sheffield Wednesday have taken the lead against Rotherham, and it’s rather controversial, Steven Fletcher being offside when the ball was played through to him, although the right-footed finish was neat.
Meanwhile, Brentford are ahead through Romaine Sawyers against Leeds, converting a rapid counter attack to make it 1-0 to them Bees.
Seb Larsson has just paid tribute to his returning captain Lee Cattermole by absolutely wiping out Riyad Mahrez on the right flank. Mahrez himself whips over the free-kick, Bob Huth heads a looper back across goal but Jordan Pickford just manages to punch it away from ‘neath the bar.
GOAL! Watford 1-0 West Brom (Niang 13)
Ah, now here’s a goal. Watford are ahead through Mbaye Niang - a rocket of a shot into the corner from the edge of the area from the Milan loanee.
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Not a massive amount going on in the Prem so far. Leicester started out quickly against Sunderland, but haven’t broken through thus far.
More Champo goals, goals, goals: Derby have taken the lead against Fulham, with David Nugent dinking a lovely wee one over Cottagers keeper David Button.
And another! Aston Villa are 1-0 up over QPR, and obviously it’s Jonathan Kodjia who has bagged. That’s nine goals in 13 games since he came back from the Africa Cup of Nations. Not bad.
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Early goal in the Champ, and Brighton have quite literally not wasted any time in going ahead against Birmingham, Glenn Murray tucking home Bruno’s cross to make it 1-0 and football’s happiest man, Gianfranco Zola, sad.
“Goochwatch,” begins Woolie Madden, leading to a brief misunderstanding on my part. “Again no place, even on the bench, for America’s Lynden Gooch, Santa Cruz’s answer to Franz Beckenbauer obviously being kept in reserve as a secret weapon for the unlikelihood of Sunderland AFC hitting a spot of bother. The younger of the Black Cats’ reserves, we can only suppose, are being treated to a first-hand demonstration of the kind of skills they might hitherto only have experienced when playing as Roberto Carlos in their FIFA Legends team. More (or not) on the Gooch next week.”
The teams are emerging in our 7.45 kick offs. Handshakes, the whole lot. We’re on.
Here’s JR in Illinois with some US media-based satire: “West Brom have been having such a good season. The best in ages. I was wondering if you think they’ve got a shot at the World Cup if they can beat the Hornets today.”
World Cup might be a stretch. They might have to settle for the Copa America.
This looks like a calamity waiting to happen...
Watch out for the criss-cross pic.twitter.com/23JkkNlQRQ
— Matt Wilson (@mattwilson_star) April 4, 2017
Headlines from those teams: Lee Cattermole makes his first appearance for Sunderland since September, which is far too late for them but nevermind; Zlatan Ibrahimovic is back for Manchester United, but Wayne Rooney is indisposed and Luke Shaw - deemed a worthless layabout by Jose the other day - is on the bench; no idea how that Everton team is actually going to line-up; from the looks of that Burnley team Steven Defour might be playing on the wing.
Any of your own thoughts/contributions to: Nick.Miller@theGuardian.com
Team news
Manchester United v Everton
De Gea; Young, Bailly, Rojo, Blind; Ander Herrera, Carrick, Fellaini; Lingard, Ibrahimovic, Rashford. Subs: Pogba, Martial, Romero, Mkhitaryan, Shaw, Fosu-Mensah, Darmian.
Robles; Holgate, Jagielka, Ashley Williams, Baines; Davies, Barry, Gueye; Mirallas, Lukaku, Barkley. Subs: Valencia, Stekelenburg, Calvert-Lewin, Lookman, Pennington, Kenny, Joe Williams.
Referee: Neil Swarbrick (Lancashire)
Team news
Leicester City v Sunderland
Schmeichel; Simpson, Benalouane, Huth, Fuchs; Mahrez, Ndidi, Drinkwater, Gray; Vardy, Okazaki. Subs: Chilwell, King, Albrighton, Amartey, Slimani, Zieler, Ulloa.
Pickford; Jones, Denayer, Kone, Oviedo; Cattermole, Larsson, Rodwell, Ndong; Borini, Defoe. Subs: Mannone, Djilobodji, Khazri, Manquillo, Gibson, Anichebe, Januzaj.
Referee: Graham Scott (Oxfordshire)
Burnley v Stoke City
Heaton; Lowton, Keane, Mee, Ward; Hendrick, Defour, Barton, Boyd; Vokes, Gray. Subs: Barnes, Brady, Westwood, Tarkowski, Pope, Agyei, Arfield.
Grant; Muniesa, Shawcross, Martins Indi, Pieters; Cameron, Adam, Allen; Diouf, Arnautovic, Berahino. Subs: Whelan, Johnson, Afellay, Imbula, Given, Crouch, Sobhi.
Referee: Kevin Friend (Leicestershire)
Watford v West Bromwich Albion
Gomes; Cathcart, Prödl, Britos, Holebas; Doucouré, Cleverley, Capoue; Niang, Amrabat; Deeney. Subs: Pantilimon, Mariappa, Success, Zúñiga, Janmaat, Okaka, D Pereira.
Foster; Dawson, McAuley, Evans, Nyom; Livermore, Fletcher (c); Brunt, Chadli, McClean; Robson-Kanu. Subs: Myhill; Yacob, Morrison, Rondon, Phillips, M Wilson, Field.
Referee: Paul Tierney (Lancashire)
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Preamble
Well, here we are again. The wheel just keeps on turning, and we just keep on keeping on. There’s football all over the shop, and round these parts we’ll be concentrating on three Premier League games this evening, with a dash of Championship and even the Coppa Italia semi-final second leg (between Roma and Lazio) thrown in too.
Leicester v Sunderland
Oh David. David, David, David. If nothing else, you wouldn’t imagine that Davie Moyes would want to give anyone an excuse to bin him off without having to pay any compo. But then again he presumably didn’t think he was doing anything wrong when he dug into the obvious comedy goldmine that is violence against women for some top banter. He’s apologised to “the girl” now, so everything on that score is just absolutely fine. Which is more than can be said for his football team, who are bottom of the league and heading down, down, down, just like their manager’s grip on his own plot: by the end of this set of Premier League fixtures they could find themselves a stonking 11 points away from safety, with just eight games remaining. They are, it hardly needs saying, toast.
Burnley v Stoke
A few months ago everyone was heartily slapping Sean Dyche on the back, congratulating him on a job well done and what an excellent thing it was that Burnley were safe from harm. Well, erm, unslap him on the back because they could be in some mither. Having not won since a 1-0 against Leicester at the back end of January put them in ninth place, Dyche’s boys are now five points clear of safety - a cushion, for sure, but a rather thin one, like that pillow you’ve got at the back of the cupboard somewhere that’s lost all its feathers, the one you only give to guests you don’t really like that much. The really bad news for Burnley is that at the very moment the arse seems to have fallen out of their season, the three teams immediately below them look rejuvenated: Hull, Swansea and Crystal Palace are all in spiffing form, and heading up as Burnley head down. They could still drop.
Watford v West Brom
“I am worried,” said Walter Mazzarri ahead of this one, which is theoretically a bit of a dead rubber between a team who won’t go down and one who won’t go higher than their current eighth place. Granted, in that context he was talking about the number of injuries Watford have, but he might also be concerned about his own future, with reports emerging that the club’s ownership, not shy of binning a manager despite reasonable results, are considering handing Walter his cards. Will a victory tonight change their minds? Probably not, since their concerns are supposedly based on his playing style and his reluctance to speak English in public. Still, who knows: maybe a rip-roaring showing will do the trick.
Manchester United v Everton
Jacob Steinberg’s got you covered on that one. Live coverage here, but we’ll dip in and out.
The Championship
Ah, the fun division. A nearly full programme for you here, and the ones to keep an eye on are Brighton, who could go within a point of Newcastle at the top should they defeat Birmingham at home, Leeds could go third with success at Brentford, Fulham travel to Derby where a Cottagers win will keep them in the playoffs and more or less stamp out any distant, lingering hopes their hosts have of sneaking in, and fellow top six likelies Reading face Blackburn. At the bottom, the right/wrong combination of results could effectively do for Wigan, currently seven points shy of safety and who play Ipswich, while three of the four immediately above them and thus ‘favourites’ for the remaining drop spot - Forest, Blackburn and Bristol City - are all in action too.
So there you have it. Join us, won’t you...?
Updated
Nick will be here shortly.
